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|strawberrychapstick (profile) wrote, |
on 6-20-2003 at 12:17am
|Current mood: groggy
Music: that song from the new kit kat commercials:
|'want to hear an amusing annecdote?' i ask a friend shortly after i arrive back home from a rollerblading venture wednesday afternoon. 'um, ok', they respond, obviously unawar of the horrible story that lay in front of them. 'well,' i begin, 'it all started innocently enough, i just wanted to go rollerblading, u kno, for a little excercise. little did i kno what was in store for me. i was just goin along for a while, and then, reaching about the halfway point on my second lap (around my community, which is a big circle) i decide its getting cloudy and should take the shortcut home, going through the club house area near the front of my comunity. i turn the corner, only to realize i am flying face down towards a dirty puddle(and i had been goin PRETTY FAST before, so this was like high speed flying). the sprinkler was on, and there was no traction- my skates had slipped right out from under me and i was hurtling, horizontally, through the air. ok, so if its bad enough that im 1) wet, 2) as far away from home as i could possibly be while still in my community, and 3)it was about to storm, i realize that i have scraped up the entire right side of my body: no joint on that side had skin on it (it was pretty greusome). o wait, and to top it all off, there were little wet dirty things sticking all over me, courtesty of the gross puddle i just landed in. ok, so i realize theres nothing i can do (i have no cellphone so my mom cant come rescue me) so i get up and start towards the clubhouse bathroom, hoping to get some papertowels or something to wipe myself off (on the way i passed this lady in a mercedes, just waiting with it on in a parking spot, applying lipstick, not even noticing me pass by even though i just wiped out two feet away from her car while yellling, "SHIT" and was clearly injured and in need of some assistance) so i make it there only finding that BOTH the bathrooms were locked (yes i checked the mens, ok?) so i go over to the shower next to the pool, take off my skates (which were my moms old ones- i grew out of mine a while ago) and try splashing some water from the litttle faucet on the bottom on my gross legs etc. at this point i still wasnt even outwardly angry or frustrated, i hadnt even said anything since teh exclamation at the puddle, and the group of kids (they were actually more like teens) in the pool were kinda glancing over at me, wondering why i was wet, while fully clothed, and lying on the pool chair with a look of defeat on my face, tending my wounded... wounds! so anyways, after a while (i realized i wasnt getting any drier sitting there cuz it was cloudy and about to storm) i just put back on my skates and start off for home, thinking about that time when i was eight and i had capsized my little pink bike trying to do a wheelie on a speed bump and my dad just said, "u just gotta get back on the horse, alexa, theres no other way" and while cautiously going down teh path through the numerous sprinklers (they were mocking me!it was a conspiracy i tell you!) i feel a snap! i look down and realize my skate just broke into two peices. OK? AS IF THINGS WERENT BAD ENOUGH ALREADY, I MEAN, COME ON! CUT ME A LITTLE SLACK HERE, WORLD! JEEZ! but again, nothing i can do, so i try skating with a broken skate and broken spirits but after about 6 seconds i realize it was not working, so i get down on someone's front lawn, take off both skates and my lime green socks, and start back home: WET, DIRTY, BLOODY, and SKATELESS. so i arrive, finally, barefoot at home, throw the skates at my garage comtemptuously, while audibly cursing them, and slam the door: hoping to draw an audience i can relate my sap story too. which is approximately the time i told this all to the aforementioned friend who, in response could just say, "jeez".
ok? ya so the next time u feel like a little black cloud is following you around, just think this lovely little anecdote... :-/