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|Holiday (profile) wrote, |
on 2-21-2002 at 5:59pm
|Current mood: confused & hurt
Music: Duncan Sheik- Barely Breathing
|oh, i just wanna cry! I've cried almost everyday this past week! Why can't stuff just be good! why!!! i'm about to cry! arghhh! I hate crying at school but did it anyways right in the hall on the way to 4th hour. Good thing Rebecca was there for me cuz I didn't have anybody else. :<
man, this is terrible. I don't think that i should post it on here though. Hardly anyone knows how I feel, those who think they do end up not. The only one who really truly knows how I feel is Ryan and I thank God we're friends because he's such a great kid! :)
My heart hurts.
Man oh man oh man...
I'm just so confused! A TON of stuff happened this Florida trip, some good, most bad. But I still tried to have fun.
I don't think I'll ever be happy for a long time. :<
I can't wait till I talk to him tonight. (I'm sure most of you reading this know who by now)
But I can't talk to him without crying, he has no idea. He doesn't care but I guess we'll find out for sure tonight. We are extremely good friends though, still, after 4 whole months. But, it's not what I wanted but still better than nothing. I was gonna go to his house and confront him about things today, but I didn't think he'd be home.
Even his BEST friend agrees that what he's doing is wrong. I only hope he'll miss me, but that's the trouble anyways because I know that as long as he wants to still be good friends, he won't.
Well, I'm gonna go and think about things.i'll probably be back. hopefully happy, not even close.