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crazydimbohead (profile) wrote,
on 2-26-2004 at 8:32pm
Current mood: stressed
Music: Audioslave - I Am The Highway ..&.. Metallica - Master Of Puppets ..&.. NIN - Closer
Subject: boo.
i have a headache...
i think im gonna type up my poems in here so you guys can read them if you want... 2 of them are poems, 1 of them is a song i wrote.....
***

"Maybe"

I have to fight myself
To get the truth
Pictures of you on my shelf
How many times can I lie to you

You mean nothing to me
And I mean everything to you
Should I stay and lie
Or , should I leave and cry?

Maybe I love you..
Maybe I donít
You love me
Or so you say..

If I told you the truth
Could you handle it?
Maybe it would be better
Or, maybe it wouldnít

You mean nothing to me
And I mean everything to you
Should I stay and lie
Or, should I leave and cry?

Maybe I love you..
Maybe I donít
You love me
Or so you say..

I need to leave and get away
From all the things
I need to know if I love you
I shouldnít lie no more

Its hurting me more than you know
Maybe I need to tell you the truth
I want to start over
I donít want to lie no more

You mean nothing to me
And I mean everything to you
Should I stay and lie
Or, should I leave and cry

Maybe I love you..
Maybe I donít
You love me
Or so you say..

I donít want to lie
I donít want to cry
I donít want to lie
I donít want to cry
NO MORE!

I want to love you
As much as you love me..
Maybe I should have told you
The truth all along..

Maybe I love you..
Maybe I donít
You love me
Or so you say..

***
That one is my song.. i wrote it like the second week in January... I wrote it while i was in fourth hour, i was bored. Me and KaCey were together at the time, and i didnt mean it towards him.. i just wrote it, without thinking...
***

"Cry" date created 12-11-03

I lay here and cry myself to sleep
Even after two months..
It just hows how much my love was!
I miss him so much
I dont only miss him
I miss everything about him
His wonderful smile
His beautiful eyes
The touch of his hand
Why did he have to leave?
No, better yet, why did he leave like he did?
I didnt get to say good-bye,
Now i have to live with that..
I still remember everything..
And i mean every little thing..
like the time he told me he was rereading my ontes i had wrote him..
And how beautiful my eyes were
Why did our first kiss have to be our last?
I told him i loved him..
I truely felt that way, and still do..
I have a feeling he has forgot about me..
Hes everywhere, but the one place he needs to be,
He isn't with me..
I cry not only because i miss him..
But because i didnt get to tell him how i truely felt..
The last time i saw him,
I left like i would've got to see him the next day..
I regret it.. now i know why he hugged me tighter that day..
I remember running towards him as fast as i could..
The look on his face, like he was surprized, was perfect..
He was perfect..
Everytime i make a wish, i wish that i would be able to see him again..
So i can tell him how i truely feel..
Everythime i was with him i felt great!
He made me feel like i ment something to someone..
He made me feel special..
He was always saying how i was different from all the other girls in a good way..
My heart had a heavy feeling evertime i was with him..
He was the first and only guy i have ever cried about..
That day his sister told me he was gone..
My heart fell apart
It felt like i was dieing,
My heart had a horrible pain..
I miss him very much..
When you love someone..
Tell them..
Tell them, before they move away just like Scott did..
Or you will regret it and cry yourself asleep everynight..

***
this is the one about this guy that i thought i was in love with.. but all i have to say right now about him is fuck him...... i hate him now... im so glad i met kacey... kacey is so much better than that #$&#@# yeah... I Love KaCey now... i have NO feelings for whats his face, Scott..........
***

"Do You Feel This Way Too?"

I can't tell you how I feel
When I'm around you
You make my heart still
Do you feel this way too?

I can't tell you how I see
When I'm around you
You're so beautiful to me
Do you feel this way too?

I can't tell you how I hear
When I'm around you
You sound so dear
Do you feel this way too?

I can't tell you how I love
When I'm around you
I soar like a dove
Do you feel this way too?

I can't tell you how I live without you
Everytime you come near
I feel so blue
So tell me, do you feel this way too?

***
that one is the one that I AM FAMOUS for... i hate it though... yeah... i am so famous for it... lol... 30 out of over 1000 got pick to be put on a cd... well i got picked, and i was put in a few books, and i keep getting invited to all these Poetry Convention things for famous poets... and they want me to read mine... i dont know.. its insane!.... lol oh well... that poem sucked! [i think anyways]
***

okay... anyways... that was boring...... im proud of my song..... i dont know...... someone mean will probably take them and publish them and take credit for them... then i will have to kick some ass! guess what? i love kacey... lol... everyone knows that... today i wrote all over his arms... mwahaha.. VICTORY IS MINE! chickenpickle! oh man today at lunch me, kayla, and kacey all went to braums and i was acting funnie... i put gravy in my mouth then spit it out and it made a funnie noise.. it was just... well.. funnie.... lol... yeah..... im bored. Ņ?Ņ?
i hate my mother. she is such a bitch... i really hate her. anyways, change subject cuz i dont wanna talk about that dumb @$#@....................... blah... donno what to say... fuck! now im pissed off.... damn it... i hate being like this.................... i wanna run away and get away from everything and everyone right now... im not gonna say what i usually say, because i dont wanna die...... but i do wanna get away from everything and everyone right at the moment... and for awhile..... i have been getting so stressed out here the past few days.... its unbelievable... CONEHEADS! ronnie just said that... lol.................... Until The Day I Die is now me and KaCey's song... really it is about us... cuz we sometimes feel like we hate eachother... and something else, kacey said it better.... i am cold!.... burrrrr its cold in hurrrr... lol... i wrote "heather was hurrrr today" on kaceys arm and he got mad.... lol........ cuz i put "hurrrr" i wrote alllll over his arms today.......... its was funnie..... im gonna take a HOT bath after while... maybe it will let me relaxe and not be so stressed out....
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