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BR0KENxSTAR (profile) wrote,
on 5-21-2004 at 8:15pm
Current mood: undecided
Music: The Offspring
Subject: Now i stand here, betrayed and broken.
hm yeah i've been off of the computer for this week beacause i had two Ds on my progress report. Psh...

Monday- Eh, nothing too special. One of my blander, non-exciting days of the week.

Tuesday- This was one of my depressed, saddish days. On Friday Armando said he was giving Juilia until Monday and then he was "cutting her off." Well here we are on Tuesday he was still with her. At lunch he has his hand flipped over on the desk so no one could read it, but i had seen it already. It sais Armando <3 Julia. So yeah i was all sad and shit, just pretty much sitting there thinking all lunch. Then i was walking to 6th period with Joana and he was over with Julia and her huge group of loud annoying friends. They were like "C'mon i wanna see you guys hug and kiss. You dont even act like you're going out." He knew i had just walked by and i looked back trying not to be obvious to see if he would kiss her. Then she was like "Im gonna be late for class" and started walking down to her class. He waited for a second and then followed her. He walked he bascially all the way to class and, well, i could still see them. He kissed her and i just about brang me to tears. All 6th period all i wanted to do was break down and cry. It sucks seeing the guy you're in love with kissing someone else. Bleh...

Mr. Orton and Mr. Davis are on administrative leave for letting the kids use the computers in their class and they watched the beheading on Nick Berg in Iraq. I guess a couple of the kids went home and told their parents they had seen it in their class and their parents called and complained to Mr. Perry. So now the teachers are basically fired....how messed up is that? It was their TAs who showed it anyways.

Wednesday- It was okayish until about 6th period, then things started looking up. Jimi told Julia in second period about Armando and i on Friday. She didn't believe her. So then i guess Fez and Monique were talking about us loud in front of one of Julia's friends and i guess she went and told Julia. So then at lunch i was walking with Jo and Jimi out to the soccer feild and one of Julia's friends comes up to me and goes, "Hey, can i talk to you? You better stay away from her man, because you dont know who you're messing with. We'll kick your ass." lmao i just laughed in her face. I found it quite hilarious that "her man" is the one coming to me, dumb bitch. XD and also the fact that Julia didn't have to balls to come up to me and tell me that herself, she had to send one of her stupid little friends. XD so yeah then we walked out the the feild and Joana took Branden's jacket and she goes "C'mon Manda, get Armando's jacket. We're going under-cover." lol so i took his jacket and put it on. Man, was it big but damn it was warm and it smelled so good. Well, probably not good to other people, but it smelled like Armando. So to me it was the best XD. I wore it all 6th period and man, i think i smelled it like everyother second. So then i was walking with JO to the bathroom and i put my hands in the pockets and there was a letter in there. Being the curious, coughnoseycough, person i am...I read it. I was from Julia. It said something like "I want to know why you broke up with me. If it was because of Ben i kinda thought you let that go. I tryed to make our realationship work and i have been talking to you and hanging out with you more. I wanted to be with you for as long as possible...yada, yada, yada." Hunny, you just got dumped. XD. So yeah i had written him a letter the night before and it basically told him how i felt so i decided to leave it in this pocket. I gave him his jacket back. Man, lol i so wanted to steal it. I probably would have slept with it. lol it smelled oh so good. Oh yeah so i walked out to the car and i looked back at him and the first thing he did was put jacket on and put his hand in the pocket. Then i saw him look back at me. lol he found it. Then later that night we were talking and he goes "Oh yeah, i broke up with Julia today." I asked him why and he said, "Well ya know how i told you we were having problems on Friday or whenever well thats why. And she found out about us on Friday. She wanted to take me back no matter what, but i didn't want to go out with her anymore." Then he was kinda quiet and goes, "And, i did it for you. I wanted to prove that what happened on Friday was serious." You should have seen the smile on my face. :D lol i was so happy. Then he said, "I noticed the look on your face Tuesday at lunch. It wasn't happy. And your poem/letter you gave me today. Did i really makey you that sad?" I told him "yeah, sorta." and he said, "Aww, that sucks. I'll make yup for it though." :D So im guessing thats a good thing. He said he told Julia to leave me alone. Im not scared of her or he little friends but i really dont feel like dealing with their bullshit right now. So yeah...

Friday- [will be added later tonight.]

<3 Amanda

Deep inside secret's burning
I Should have known all the while what's true
I went along, to fool myself
Can't go on, I can't escape it

All along
I think I really knew
It was there in the words unspoken
All along
Still believed in you
Now I stand here betrayed and broken

Close my eyes from the burning
All along all the while it's true
Take it on, or turn your back
Either way, you can't escape it

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