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kailster (profile) wrote,
on 12-22-2004 at 12:09am
Current mood: tired
well yet again it's been ages since i've written in here but i'm not gonna take the time to play catch up...so here's what's new

i got home last friday with chris on the train, it wasn't too bad riding home except i had a SHIT load of stuff to carry...yeah...never take a train home from college when you're coming home for a MONTH! lol so i'm back in BC...woohoo...i can't wait to fuckin go back to school! i don't have a life without state it feels like...i mean yeah i got to see my mom and my dogs and i miss them a lot...but then again i feel like a highschooler without a car and a job and any goal in life...but i guess i'm just a college student now with those things anyways...eh well friday night i got to hang with kane, she came over and spent the night, so that was cool to see her and talk. we reminised on the good ol days but knew that they were just that now...good memories of stupid shit we did, and we'll always remember! tiffany came over to my house for a lil while and that was cool to see her...yah things are a lot different and it's kinda akward but...i'm just glad she's happy and doing well. after that me and kane drove to steak and shake, got some milkshakes and fries...it was a good time. then saturday i was SUPPOSED to hang out with chris but didin't really get to do that till sunday and even then we were with his family the whole time...heh i was just glad to see him!

well monday i woke up and got around my cousin hannah was here for a couple nights so i hung out with her and then my mom took her home. i waited around till chris' mom called me and they came and picked me up...chris had got his wisdom teeth pulled out so i went over there and took care of him all yesterday and last night. i was happy to do it though...it gives you that good feeling of helping someome out when they need it the most...especially someone you love, and that's why i did it! i love him! he was really out of it for a while, and got really sick...but i just tried my best to take care of him and keep him somewhat happy. we woke up this morning and went to his eye appt with him...sometimes i feel like we're already married but....i guess that's not a bad thing right? heh ... so after that i was gonna come home and change but i didn't i just stayed there and his mom had this get-together for christmas so a bunch of people were over and we had food and stuff...so it was fun! untill...i got a really bad headache and had to ask chris if he would take me home while crying because i felt so out of place and really really really bad....shit happens to me like that a lot...when i feel out of place around people i don't know that well...i get really uneasy. but he brought me home and now i'm sitting here...wondering if chris hates me...yeah i know he doesn't but i just feel so bad...i dunno...he was eating a cookie and i was asking him where his keys were and he had some sprinkles on his lip and meagan just brushed them off and just acted like it was nothing...and it wasn't anything big...but grrr...ah! i'm such a bad person! i hate myself for that but...i can't help it. i think chris told her what happened the weekend he came home and i didn't and they hung out and i got really upset about it...but oh well...she hates me she hates me right? eh...not like everyone else doesn't.

i talked to mair the other day for a lil bit...god i miss her a lot...i miss MSU i miss going to classes and not worrying about shit...i miss not being upset and having something to actually be stressed out and upset about...like school...i can't wait to go back...

i guess i'm gonna go attempt to sleep..maybe i'll write for a while...but...till next time...g'night and happy holidays to everyone!
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