|Add Memory | Add To Friends|
|onceagainistandalone (profile) wrote, |
on 4-10-2005 at 1:01am
|i can't sleep.
i can't stop thinking about like..everything.
i was in a daydream all day...and now when i try to sleep i just end up staring at whatever is directly in front of me. then i get uncomfertable, roll around about. repeat.
i really feel that i made a wrong decision in coming here.
not just because i lost my job or anything..whoop dee doo..thats number 5 in the past 8 months.
its like..i don't know..i stopped writing, stopped reading books, i don't play my guitar as much. its like i don't have heart anymore to do the things i love.
now i just smoke pot and watch tv, and it makes me very unhappy.
and don't fucking say im not trying. everytime i pick up that pen nothing comes and everytime i pick up that guitar i get so frustrated i just wanna break it cause im just stuck.
stuck in this fucking state this room this chair.
not like i thought it would be, definatley not worth everything i left.
i realize now that all my updates say basically the same thing.
matthew james hinton