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ladymcgrady (profile) wrote,
on 7-7-2005 at 10:06pm
Current mood: sad
Subject: Crappiest Week Ever :(
This week should have been so good but it sucked :( the good thing wuz all my office times were later so i could have gone out at night but of course stuff happened that caused bobby not to sleep so he wuz tired and then the one day i'm home early from work he has to work all day :( it just never works out for me...and i've just been slipping into depression lately too and i dunno y, bobby thinks i have issues but he has no idea :-\ i'm just not myself lately, the desire to move out is growing, i'm tired of people, i just wanna be by myself, come home from work to babe and just not have to deal with anyone...excluding bobby cuz of course i want him in my life, he IS my life, i dunno what i'd do without him...but now it seems like he's upset with me cuz he knows when i abbreviate our i love u's i'm upset or angry so when he does it to me he has to know that i'm wondering whatz up, he just seemed off when i talked to him, itz probably cuz he's still tired...i hope...i dunno, i take things to heart that i shouldnt, and i dunno, i'm starting to freak cuz i'm seeing my possibly only chance to go to ocean city slip away :( i just want it to happen so badly but it probably wont...i dunno, i just dunno...i wish he'd come back online to talk to me but at the same time i try to tell myself that maybe i shouldnt alwayz visit him at work or have to talk to him before work, but then every time i tell myself that some time apart would be good i just miss him so much, maybe i will go away to school, i wanna go back, i wanna go dorm somewhere, i'm missing out on the whole college experience and i kinda feel like a loser when people ask where i went to school and i say LCCC, everyone else is naming big name schools and then there's me, miss community college, i know itz silly but i still feel kinda ashamed :-\ well i dunno where i wuz going with this but i'm done now.
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