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wiredshut (profile) wrote,
on 10-6-2005 at 5:04pm
Current mood: blank
Music: none
Subject: mumma.
hi. just checking in i guess, the stupid school internets down so im in the libary again- cant wait til i get my computer. not really muck to say but ill probably waffle as usual. my ema's started so im going to the clothes show live this year which should be fun. checked my bank account again yesterday though and the weirdest thing- i suddenly had another 40! where on earth did it come from? oh well im not complaning. the doctors that had been visiting mum everyday since the last suicide attempt have suggested that she go into a mental hospital for a week. so shes gone to the new one in lowestoft, apparantly theres only about 5 others in there. she was quite keen on going except for leaving me home alone so me and non had to convince her that i was no longer a child. she rang up last night and it was horrible she said that you have to use cards to get through any door (mums terrible with technology) and that there were no windows. she said she wanted to come home. i advised her to stick it out. hopefully the doctors can sort out her medication once and for all. shes finding it so hard to cope at the moment that the house is a tad cluttered (not as much as it has been in the past) and so me and non have desided to have a good clean out and sort everything out for when she gets back. i ought to get home and feed the animals and put the washing in the machine so ill go in a sec. its lovely having the house to myself. the quiet. sometimes it gets lonely but then i play music or sing or something. plus the animals are there. its weird, i love the solitude at night but most people as so as their parents are away would instantly think- party! but all i can think of is- cooking! or independance. apparantly as mum was taken away (i was at school) she was going on to non how i was still a baby and she must take care of me ect ect. i never really realise how she suffocates me- im used to it. non isnt though and thinks its really weird. oh well. i had better go now. see you.
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