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|lovelykittykat16 (profile) wrote, |
on 10-20-2005 at 11:58am
|Current mood: guilty
Music: Stacie Orrico - Stuck
Subject: God, kill me please...
|Im sick of hating and loving Him. i want him to be happy and yet i want myself happy but i cant make us both happy. i dont want him angry with me but he is. I told him i dont wish to speak with him ever again but i dont know if thats true. i want to be his friend and someday more. i still tell people to this day i am going to live with him, im going to have him as mine again but thats not always true, i dont know the future, i just wish i could predict it. Well i wish to keep him unnamed, Even though i know almost everyone knows who im talking about. So if you leave a comment, Dont say his name please. Ill always love you, I know you dislike me right now but im sorri, i am me, noone can rule my life, it hurt me for you to still care because i love you so much...it hurts all day long. i just wish you could understand it, not talking to you makes it worse cuz i know just hearing Hello from you helps me through the day, to believe one day we will be again. i dont drink very often, Which last time i drank i had one Smirn off lol, not even enough to get Buzzed, I looked at it and shook my head in Disbelief, now i might drink with my brother Brian but thats because lol he has wanted me to since i was like 13. So ya....I love you always....Goodbye....|