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aushpog (profile) wrote,
on 3-19-2006 at 3:13pm
Current mood: crazy
Music: the fray = cable car (over my head)
Subject: NUTSINESS.
this weekend at all-state was great. the music was wonderful, but the best part was being a dork with all the cool people i "roll with, yo." ok, so that joke is worn out, but i'll bring it back. along with gnawing on kneecaps and stuff. but anyway, i love people, and they're hilarious, and it was awesome to hang out with them and get to know them because they're all so GREAT. i love to laugh, and i needed it.

on another note, i was thinking of something random today. i realized that i have always wanted things i can never have. i have always liked the unreachable guy since forever, always wanted the unreachable feeling. why is that? when a great thing was in front of me, i didn't want it. i still don't want it. i still want that unreachable thing, the thing on the top shelf in a room where there are no chairs. and when climbing the shelf is simply not an option.

and while we're on that shelf analogy, i've been putting god on the shelf. it's bad and i'm tired of doing that, tired of squeezing him in where there's extra space. how come life is like that? when the most important thing on my list is just a compromise and everything else dictates not only my schedule but who i am? of course, who i am in the most shallow sense.

god, give me your desires.
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