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|highlyevolved (profile) wrote, |
on 4-4-2006 at 7:49pm
|Music: the beatles :: hello, goodbye
Subject: a lazy tuesday night
|I've written I think, less than 50 entries over the past year. Which is pretty pathetic, because a lot has been going on in my life. Maybe because I know nobody reads this except me I don't put in the effort to entertain people? Anyway, iTunes is highly addictive. I've bought 24 songs randomly, including the 90s classic "Barbie Girl", which I've realized is a totally disgusting song. Crazy Danish people and there double entrendres. I wish I could speak French or that the life that I live in my mind was real. I'm awesome at imagining things to be a lot better than they are. I kind of feel like the reason I'm going to prom is to make up for my lack of participation over the past four years. I'm really sad high school is going to be over because I can't make up for the time I lost, the mistakes I made. I'm also upset about how distant I feel from everyone, this isn't how I imagined things being at all. The closeness I felt with some people is not there at all. It's like I know them, but it's just kind of a run of the mill 'how is your day' type of stuff. Nothing honest or intimate. And it kinda sucks. It doesn't kind of suck, actually. It really hurts. And I'm hurt and nobody knows. Huzzah.