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|c-ramon-otero (profile) wrote, |
on 5-1-2009 at 10:23am
|I know everyone has problems. We all do. I know this.
I let my problems control my life. My past. I've let it ruin me. For far too long.
I was let it depress me and scare me. I've been at a stand still for ages.
I've always thought that actual happiness was out of my reach. I would try but fail.
And something that's never happened before. I snapped.
I was angry. At myself. My past. My life. It wasn't sadness. It was fury. Rage at myself.
For being so weak. And someone I actually care about saw that. And for that I'm sorry.
I decided that I had to leave the past behind me. But I started to think, "I am this way cause my past, so I can't change who I am." And I grew depressed. Like really.
For the first time in years, I just thought of ending it.
But, I got advice for a black guy and you know, it was actually good.
I'm ready. I'm ready to fix myself. And to fix what I've done.