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|chuchitaaa (profile) wrote, |
on 7-19-2013 at 10:02pm
|Current mood: stressed
Music: sometimes we pray too long.
Subject: ... being alone with my thoughts.. is dangerous.
|one thing i noticed about myself - if i am alone with my thoughts for too long .. i WILL sabotage whatever good thing is in my life . sad but true. & now i am on bed rest . the baby is too low & so is the placenta. been having pains & bleeding.. so rest & pray is all i can do.. my husband & i have continued to have our faith in God and each other and are trying to make this work. it's not going to be easy.. be ANY means. i have a lot of trust issues i have to get over. & he has a lot of things to work on. but , things have been good. i met his brother from Germany & step sister. more of his family and such. but our living situation is still all fucked up. & he doesn't seem interested in trying to change it. he SAYS he is. he tells me everyday how much he misses me & loves me. but, i don't think we are going to be living together until next year. which i am extremely upset about. & idk where his head is about it. i'm trying to avoid ANOTHER argument. but this is really just.. ugh. =/ so i think i'm just going to listen to music, lay here with my dog (Lola) & watch the baby kick. lol.
-- speaking of which , we can't seem to agree on a baby name either. every time we do. one of us changes our minds. lol