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rek (profile) wrote,
on 5-3-2004 at 11:18pm
let me be, standing guard. your hands over your face. i know you don't like to see it, i know you don't like to feel it. and here i am falling asleep trying to keep awake falling asleep... is this war? dream, daydream? counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums.
counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums.

forget we have an existence/ ./and just be. go back to sleep. there are no questions there.
this war. this is. is this?
curled up in fetal position, awaking in a sweat, still.. clutching the knife. rek, protect me. your paranoia may just save me. and this.
is actually happening.
constance knows. there is always truth in denial. i deny that it is true. the clocks obey her; occurances happen over and over; time is circular flux.

when will i be safe? when she is real. but i know that cannot be. remember, denial is truth. scoffing, i like to scoff, this doesn't happen like you're imagining it. someone have some sense here. rosewen? no; too caught up in the petty. keesha? is not aware of anything but her happiness. how am i pushing through? mantra's strength bleeding into mine. and this is how we always know each other.
daishou, war goddess, weapons in your hands and always by your side. keep me [no, keep REK] from making rash actions. help me strategize. help me keep myself together and in constant state of defense, defense, not offense. they won't know i am capable of it until it is too late; until they make their move. this arron in the back of your mind? oh, you know you wish you could know what he knows. if anything.

let's go back to sleep. let's let calmness [constance] creep back into control.
[she is. the mask. of rek.] only removed in sleep. covering subconsciousness; dreamscaper's drawing you out like poison [devils] and horace will have his time someday.

let's just. go BACK. to SLEEP.
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