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Serenity (profile) wrote,
on 6-10-2004 at 5:42pm
Subject: 10/27/03 - 1/16/04
10/27
"You're a crackhead." - Peter (last name unknown)

"*sings* I could wear my sunglasses at night." - Ron Wheaton

"What does the phrase 'big juicy scoop' remind you of?" - Jake Watson

10/28
"Someone told me I looked like their grandma's couch." - Amanda (last name unknown)

"Jennifer Lopez is so hot." - Emily Rowe

10/29
"What's a homo?" - Mr. Reed

"I was spooning with my dog before I came to school." - Stephanie Lewis

10/30
"I wanna steal your lip." - Neilee Metzger

"I wanna poke your cleavage." - Kate

"Nice to know I have gopher qualities." - Kate

"Oh shit, I shot Marvin in the face." - Jay Ruster

"Now I can drink fluids out of things without putting my mouth on... things." - Ron Wheaton

"When you least expect it, I'll be there, sniffing your hair." - Emily Rowe

"They don't play gore anymore, do they?" - Mrs. Olsen
"Yeah." - Tyler Metzger
"Oh they do? Good." - Mrs. Olsen

"The world burns around us, not in us." - Joe Castine

10/31
"Shh, I'm sharin' my life here." - Mrs. Olsen

11/1
"My grandma has butterballs." - Stephanie Lewis

"Kate, I just got spanked." - Stephanie Lewis

11/3
"I'm such a sweaty mop." - Justine Gunneson

11/4
"Ya wanna dance old man?" - Emily Rowe

"I have muscle, it's just covered." - Ron Wheaton

11/5
"It's like when you stick your finger in your belly button for like, an hour, and it smells really bad." - Emily Rowe

"I grope everyone equally." - Kate

"My pee's gonna flow in a minute." - Stephanie Lewis

"I love corn. Especially when it's on my ass." - Joe Castine

"Look at that beaner juice." - Joe Castine

"They start out swearing, then get naked, then they're killing people." - Mrs. Olsen

"If you all pass out, I'm not giving you mouth-to-mouth." - Mrs. Olsen

11/6
"Good ol' pornography." - Zach Ebenstein

11/10
"A turkey-human! With squirral hands!" - Neilee Metzger

"What's mellophobia a fear of?" - Mr. Reed
"...melons?" - Kate

"Phyllis has milky hair." - Stephanie Lewis

"What's with the stupid 'A' on his shirt?" - Kate
"It's his shirt, dear. You said her." - Neilee Metzger
"Nuhuh. He said she." - Ron Wheaton

11/13
"We can dance, we can dance, everyone can look at your pants." - Emily Rowe

11/14
"Every word she says I want to slap back in her face and make her choke on it." - Stephanie Lewis

"You may be slick, but I'm quick." - Jacqui DeFouw

11/18
"If it has a penis and he's hot, I like him." - Neilee Metzger

11/19
"Mr. Carr's a fruit loop." - Stephanie Lewis

"I can't get my shirt off, I think Mike's gonna have to do it." - Stephanie Lewis

11/20
"Why are you dating tall guys with small penises? Nobody likes sex until they have it. It seems all bad till you do it. See this is my thoery on sex. If everybody was makin' love everyone would be happy. See this is why all those kids come to school with guns and shit, they're not getting laid! If they were gettin' some they'd be happy, they'd be good. Look at the 60's: everybody was making love and smoking weed. Everybody was happy living in their vans with 15 people. Everyone was good. Cause everyone was getting laid." - Emily Rowe

"I think it's stupid when boys call girls gay. Guys love watchin' girls make-out, so how is calling some girl gay a bad comment to her? I think being gay is beautiful." - Emily Rowe

"Toucan Sam, the fruit loop man." - Emily Rowe

"If you're ever in my house, you can't lick the walls." - Fournier

"He told me to go lick a dead deer before." - Jake Shain

"It tasted like runny eggs with chunks in it." - Bill Korb

"I've seen old people porn." - Stephanie Lewis

"See, like Emily said, if we were all gettin' laid, we'd be good." - Kate
"Yeah, that's why Ashley's so angry all the time." - Stephanie Lewis
"Who do I wanna get laid by, huh?" - Ashley
"Me. I'm the love master, yo. Just like Kate; Kate's a beast." - Stephanie Lewis

"Cripples make the best lovers." - Stephanie Lewis

"Morons need more-Ron." - Ron Wheaton

11/21
"Hand him some chicken and be like, 'wanna get married?'" - Emily Rowe

11/24
"Silly Kate, trix are for kids." - Emily Rowe

"Pink will never be in." - Joe Castine

"It has no flavor, no taste. Oh wait... that's the same thing." - Jacqui DeFouw

"I don't know too many people who have been fucked up the ear." - Rob Shively

11/25
"If you give me candy, you can seduce me. It's what you really want in the end." - Emily Rowe

"They're kinda hard to eat because they're so furry." - Mrs. Crowley

"Take their dildo, set it on fire, and make 'em eat it." - Amanda Covey

"She looks great and she's good with a gun; what more do you want?" - Mrs. Olsen

11/30
"When I get to heaven, I won't have to sit on toilet seats that people peed on." - Lorrie Shelton

12/1
"I didn't ask what species you are, I asked who you were." - Emily Rowe

12/2
"Think of a volcano as the anus of the Earth." - Fournier

"She was trying to do this lesbian religious belly dance for Courtney." - Stephanie Lewis

"Do you go ass diving for Joyce's ass potatoes?" - Stephanie Lewis

"I think Ashley should get hit by a car." - Stephanie Lewis
"Thanks." - Ashley
"I'll be driving the car." - Kate

"If nut had a taste, it'd taste like rye bread." - Jay Ruster

"Don't make me spit sandwich all over your face." - Joe Castine

12/3
"Her cock is bruised." - Stephanie Lewis

"They've been talking to hobos." - Mrs. Olsen

12/4
"In 50 years, you'll just be a name on a tombstone somewhere." - Mrs. Olsen

"They're throwing seeds, how is that risque?" - Amanda Bigney
"You'd be surprised where risque can happen." - Mrs. Olsen

"All those black people doin' their thing out there." - Mrs. Olsen

12/5
"My goal in life is to have sex on a moving roller coaster." - Courtney Rae

12/10
"That means 'I lick myself.'" - Mrs. Crowley

"I was president of the geek club. I was proud." - Fournier

"She'll rip a little ass for ya, if you want. You can bite a piece o' that out of the air." - Stephanie Lewis

"We don't beat people, we whip them." - Ron Wheaton

"Most of the streetwalkers I've seen wear jeans. I see 'em down on division. My husband has a lot of rentals in the ghetto." - Mrs. Olsen

"Somehow we got off on hookers." - Mrs. Olsen

12/11
"Fat cats are pleasing to me." - Mrs. Crowley

"I hate democracy." - Corey Chase

"I like to think of it as 'love makes the world go 'round.'" - Fournier

12/12
"That was diet pepsi and trail mix; my recipe for vomit." - Stephanie Lewis

"I'm a pig fucker." - Jay Ruster

"How do you knock yourself up?" - Ron Wheaton

12/15
"I didn't just draw it, it's real corn. I stole it from the field by the Cedar View. I'm a rebel." - Allyn Longcore

12/16
"Love makes death brief." - Mrs. Crowley (quoting a movie)

12/17
"I had to take my butt ball out." - Ron Wheaton

"Have you ever seen my PE shirt?" - Neilee Metzger
"The slutty one with the holes in the nipples?" - Ron Wheaton
"...no." - Neilee
"Oh yeah, that's mine." - Ron

12/18
"You kissed me on the boob." - Stephanie Lewis

12/20
"I think it's all in your plan to try to get me to die." - Lorrie Shelton

12/22
"God, if I cut my wrist open, she'd yell at me for bleeding on the floor." - Jay Ruster
"I shit you not." - Jay

1/5
"What's the plural word for penis?" - Stephanie Lewis
"Penises?" - Kate
"Penai." - Stephanie Lewis

1/6
"I'm gonna suck on some boobs." - Alex Grecheski

"I'm gonna slap Kate with my stick." - Stephanie Lewis

"Just remember, I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you." - Mrs. Olsen

"Yeah, I have radioactive spit." - Ron Wheaton

1/9
"Lick my ass. god." - Courtney Rae

"She's gonna make us rape her." - Courtney Rae

"They're pressing charges because it's not the first time he brought body parts to show-and-tell." - Mrs. Crowley

"Two of them go down on all fours, then the others jump on their butt." - Sam Hamilton

"Look at that pus-sack." - Stephanie Lewis

"I was hoping I'd fall on the floor so she'd start tearing my clothes off." - Some kid in the hallway

"No, I wanna eat your boob." - Joe Castine

"I realized yesterday I have a phobia of getting shot by a black guy." - Jay Ruster

1/13
"I'm about to crap my pants up here." - Mrs. Crowley

"What if the only way to get rid of chronic bronchitis was by pulling their tube out by their mouth and sucking out the mucus?"
- Stephanie Lewis

"I just stabbed myself in the milk bubble." - Stephanie Lewis

1/14
"I dreamt that Mike gave me head last night." - Stephanie Lewis

"Thirsty? Do you want to suckle my zipple?" - Joe Castine

1/16
"Sneak out, open the gates, and kill the city!" - Mrs. Olsen

"I doubt my husband could kill me. Though he says he could." - Mrs. Olsen

"Where do aids come from?" - Tyler Metzger
"Monkeys." - Mrs. Olsen
"Where do we get them?" - Tyler
"Sex. Sex with monkeys." - Mrs. Olsen
"See! They were having sex with their monkey buddies down in Africa and that's where aids came from." - Tyler

"I'm bored and horny... and hungry. These things are close to unbearable when only one is happening, but all three... it's a trio of terror."
- Ron Wheaton
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