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playachika (profile) wrote,
on 9-18-2004 at 8:11am
Current mood: scared
Music: my happy ending
well hello! i just woke u p and its sooo early in the morning...
last night i went to the football game.28-26 baby! i took lyndsey with me. we had alot of fun! i called greg and told him to go... but he didnt call back.. i was upset.. he said he did.. but i guess it didn't go through? i dont kno, i just wanted to see him and iwas really close to his house and everything...i dont know.. god i want to just kiss him and make everything all better.
there was a peprally yesterday.. it was pretty lame. i was by pedro sean marie n matt. it was like.. i dunno, alot diff then being a freshman but also at the same time still lame! lol.. i honestly was such a bitch to michael yesterday.. i mean i feel bad but in the long run.. i dont. he hurt me worse than anyone has yeah i was just a bitch to him..
hes liek.. "why are you being so bitchy?"
and i said.. "because i hate you" and walked away.! thats sooo not me, but yah kno, when someone says you enjoy something terrible, he needs to die.
that was the highlight of my day when he said that haha!
know what i realized? i havnt gotten drunk in sooooooo long. im so proud of myself.
im going to TRY to be good but everytime i see greg, i just want to make him happy. i mean yeah we did it like 5 times but i always dont like having sex... its like.. i dont know, id rather just hang out. but imean its good tho...that we do it... i just wanna hang out more.. but whatever happens happens right?
ataulyl what i want is a kiss.. thats all i want right now.. is a kiss... a kiss to get me through a week of smiling... so i know hes there and hes not doing anything with anyone else. i know hes not. thank god i can trust him. lol...i like him alot.. maybe im just a stupid sophomore.. but i like him alot. he gives me butterflys. :]
okay now onto why it says my mood is scared.
i had a REALLY bad nightmare.. thtas also why im up so damn early lol.
ok.. i dont even know how it started, but i went on a walk and i was talking on my phone, but then i looked back and there was alot of cars all of a sudden by the entrance to my neighbor hood and a lil neighbor girl that looked like a lil girl from my church, was riding her plastic bike across bass rd. with all these cars all alone! so i got off the phone, ran and got her and brought her back to my hosue? my house why? i dont kno.. but anyway.. when iw as getting ready to take her home i said "i wish it could go fast".. and there was a blue car i recignizedbacking up into my driveway. of course i got freaked out because in the dream it was like 130 am! and then i froze with the lil baby and they popped the truck and it was supposed to be paul popping out but for some reason it was sean simmons and he was comming towards me and said .. "was that fast enough".. i was froze so i screamed and then he started to take me and somehow Casey from renaissance, his friend, came out of the car... and like then we started yelling. i was so scared. then one of them through something and it ended up looking like blood spilled by the front door. my mom opened the door and i ran in and i forgot my dog and the baby and her dog i guess lol and then my mom opened the door back up and all 3 ran inside. i went back out and yelled "how the hell could you do that infront of a baby!" then i leaned up against the house and startd crying... and i woke up crying...
that was my weird night. i had 9 phn calls i missed an dmy phn wa son loud and i was in such a deep sleep it was crazzzy.
well i think im done rambling!
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