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| Twitchy (profile) wrote, on 11-7-2004 at 11:10am | |
| Current mood: ugh Music: something by Green Day |
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| sunday's are the hangovers of the week so give me a bathrobe and lose my razor and call he ready just thinking a little and cyler's kinda right ... life's changed alot ... I knew if but I didn't like to think of it that much take a look at you most recent yournal entry and then back at your first and tell me what do you see? feel free to post on this, tell me what you do see I see a guy who was really really lost ... a guy no one really cared about, a guy who'd had a hell of a year before that, and who was basically living in a mental breakdown, an agnostic who barely took care of himself, really just living to pass the time, not doing anything but leeching on to something small in life, a mildly intelligent person constantly in pain .... I was miserable ... then there were a few days really that defined my life ... February 14th, thank god for that day, I remember coming up here and thinking it had been a long year and knowing that I was falling apart, and then I got a big flash of realization, before that, January 31st I believe ... hated myself for that, then there was March ... and spring break after that, (alot of these references you don't understand or think sound small, but they worked to wake me up) ... things went on but in the end I'm still depressed and I still have a guilt complex, I still float around dissassociated sometimes and I still feel alot of anxiety ... but what didn't manage to kill me did make me stronger, I think I'm a batter person for it ... I learneed alot more from alot of exestential exposure, I saw alot ... in life, the better and the worse sides, I found a neiche, basically I think if I could get over that, if we could all get oevr the past few years of life, just makes us better, stronger, or t least that's what happened to me ... life still has downs, and alot of em, but it's got a few ups now ... it feels wrong to admit things are a little better, but I look back at the clique that started this, all spread around ... well ... things are different ... so tell me ... what's changed for you, look at your first and last entry |
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independenttruckergrl | 11-07-04 12:14pm I see.
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Chocolatemilk | 11-07-04 7:57pm I saw you today!! AHh!!!
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