| Add Memory | Add To Friends | |
| Atman (profile) wrote, on 12-24-2004 at 11:58pm | |
| Current mood: creative Music: American Idiot Subject: X-mas Eve |
|
| Ignore my previous entry of 'duh'. My e-mail wasn't functioning very well. This is my second entry this month, but its more of a story. If you like to read stories or you are just bored then go ahead and read this. If you have a short attention span or don't like me talking, or whatever, don't bother. For those of you who feel like it, its a good story. BEFORE YOU READ BELOW Before you read anything I'm about to type below this paragraph, please understand something. I'm not a cruel heartless bastard who doesn't appreciate family. Thats not me. I love my family and would do almost anything for them. Be aware that this is just one of my standard bitchings, but in holiday form. If anyone types anything about me hating my family and not understanding the true meaning of Christmas, I hope you walk outside tomorrow and a giant penis lands on your head, and it cannot be removed. That said. Today I spent practically all day with my cousins. We went to see Lemioney dicketts 'A Series of Crappy Movie' today. Oog. Not a good movie. It gets a S, and anyone in the know knows what I'm talking about. After seeing this movie, we came back to my place where my cousins drove me nuts. Maybe I should not have been trying to teach them about playing 'The Sims'. They are just a LITTLE bad in role playing games, but I figure its better for them to get hooked on this then all that shooter shit where its like "Hey, that object moved! Lets blow it away with this cool rocket launcher! "My cousin who I know stole some games from me was very dissappointed when I wouldn't let him even NEAR any of my things. We got to my Grandma Ginger's house around 6 o clock, and went inside. This might be a good time to clear something up. I don't get good gifts here, as shallow as that sounds, but its ok, its the thought that counts. But, I went in there optimistic thinking, "Maybe they got me something since its senior year." Sure, incredibly gheedy, but I figured I could dream. I walk in, and my Aunt gives me a hug, and my technically cousin chucks me a package of glow sticks. Cousin:Merry Christmas! Me:Oh Snap! Glow...sti...c...ks. Cousin:I was too lazy to wrap them, so I figured I'd give them to you know. Me (Thinking):Its good to know I'm good enough for you to get up off your lazy ass and actually DO something. Me (really):Oh wow! Thanks April! Everyone in school who is cool has one of these! Its good to know you looked at my Christmas list. April:Well, I saw it and it screamed my name. Me (thinking):If you read my list, you would have noticed the little sub note I made at the bottom saying, "if you are thinking about buying me something stupid, save the money and don't get me anything. It won't be as insulting" Me (Really):I'm gonna go get some pop! After that event, the kids and I wrestled and goofed around, until my uncle and other aunt came inside, for they have cows. I noticed the kids were screaming like little ADD kids on pixie sticks, so I brought them into the living room and turned on the TV in an attempt to slow them down. I found some Frosty thing, and turned it to that, but shortly realized, it was gay. Its where Frosty gets married. Come on man, who the hell does that even deal with Christmas? Whats the moral, "Even snowmen can get some?" My little 6 or 7 year old cousin looked up at me and said, "This is absolute shit and an insult to my intelligence." I laughed, gave him the remote and told him to find something. He found that "Teenage Robot" thing, and everyone was watching it, starting to calm down. Then, Dumbass appeared. My retarded...however he's related to me, named Dan. He walks in on the robot thing and says, "Hey, this isn't Christmas related." Takes the remote from Anthony, my cousin, and flips it back to Frosty. Actual dialog from Frosty. Frosty:We want to get married, sir. Minister:I can't marry you, I can only marry human adults. Frosty:Awwww...what'll we do now? Frosty's Bitch:I don't know. Minister:But, if we made a snowman minister, you two COULD get married. At this point, my little cousin was whacking his head against a wall. In pity, I changed the channel once Dan was gone. The kids began to watch again, when Dan re-entered and said, "Well, someone doesn't have any christmas spirit." He flipped it back and kept the remote. Precisely 2 minutes later the kids were already trying to see if they could all dog-pile on top of me. Later, while the kids were eating, I entered into the living room again and saw Dan watching ESPN."Hey," I scolded,"this doesn't appear to be very Christmasy." Dan just laughed, and said,"I don't need to listen to you". Being the bigger man, I walked away. Ok, maybe on my way out I kicked the footrest out from under him, but I still think of myself as the bigger man. Seconds later, Dan got up to go help his wife, and I moved like a python. I quickly changed it to whatever the hell was on the Christmas channel, which was another sequel to something. Another crappy one, anyway. Dan walks in, and promptly squeals,"What the fuck?" I screamed at him while covering one of my cousin's ears, "EARMUFFS!!" Dan glared at me menacingly, and I cooly walked away. He sat his ass back down and switched it back to some special about Dale Earnheart, or whatever. I don't like Nascar at all, so the next part should be obvious. I went back in after he went to get a refill, changed it to the crappy christmas special, and took one of the batteries from the remote, which I now hold in my paw. Sure enough, he sat down, and bitterly complained to me about it, but wouldn't get his fat ass up off the chair to change it. Ah. My uncle came in from the outside, and threw me a pack of cards. "Merry Christmas" he mumbled, and proceeded to the living room, all the time avoiding eye contact. I just nodded at the OPEN pack of cards I received. "Its the thought that counts" I repeated to myself. "And this shows he didn't even goddamn think about it". We began opening gifts. I dread this part, because if you don't know this about me, allow me to tell you. I'm no good at accepting complements, suggestions, or gifts. We passed out all the gifts, and everyone was excited. I looked at my mom. She had about five gifts. My dad? About four. Me? Two. I'm fully aware of how shallow this sounds, but I thought,"Its Christmas, its not about gifts, its about how much you care." I opened up the first one, which was a Santa Claus dressed in Lions colors. I thanked my grandmother who had given it to me. I opened the second, also from my grandmother. It was a Garfield book. I was somewhat excited, I guess, but I said thanks. Everyone else continued to unwrap their gifts as I stared blankly at mine. Then it hit me. Grandma didn't pick ANY of this. My mom just told her what to get, and Grandma obliged. I could tell. Right there it was like someone stuck a knife through me. I went into my grandmother's bed, and stared at the ceiling."I'm going to be gone next year," I thought."And it doesn't bother any of them? They haven't said anything about college, or good luck, or anything. Its my senior year! It doesn't mean anything to them?" I remember when almost all of them had troubled times, and I was there for them, and how I didn't want to lose them. But, me leaving didn't matter? I just stared at the ceiling, feeling uncared for, unimportant, greedy, stupid, and all sorts of other things. "Addison," I heard,"Addison?" I sat up to see my little cousin named Devon, whos about two, maybe three staring at me. "Yes Devon?" I said a little raspy. Devon suddenly climbed on top of the bed and hugged me and said, "Marry Chrismas". I hugged Devon back and whispered Merry Christmas back. I remember shedding a tear or two, as we just sat there for a minute. "Devon," I said,"You have no freakin idea how much this means to me. Thanks." Devon just stared at me bright-eyed, for a second or two, when Dan busted in and cried, "Devon! I've been looking all over for you." He picked Devon up and glared at me. "C'mon, your moms taking pictures and I told her I'd get your lazy ass in there." Devon stared at me on his hostile trip out the room. I sat there for a second or two, and realized there were symbols, metaphors, and all sorts of literary shit that Mr. Stark would get a boner for. I smirked to myself and whispered, "The crow is on the fence". With that, I got up and went to get my pictures taken. |
|
| Post A Comment |
|
Tuwang | 12-25-04 1:10am I'm going to fuck you harder than any one ever has addison... assuming I roll a 14 or better... because my penis does 3d50 damage, with +30 magic missle that is automatically cast twice per round. Ha!, that means I can fuck you thoroughly and not have to clean the room of enemies before I rest... and you said lawful good clerics couldn't do shit. |
Tuwang | Re:, 12-25-04 1:14am and that is the greatest christmas present of all
|
Tuwang | Re: Re:, 12-25-04 1:15am P.S. Once you go Cleric
|
atman | Re: Re: Re:, 12-25-04 11:16pm Sorry, I don't do Clerics. Potions are my clerics, bizatch. I'm more of a meat shield man myself.
|
jim9nin | Re: Re: Re: Re:, 12-30-04 9:06pm Here atman i got you some hedge clippers it does 3d50 damage and comes with a 3x multiplier against penises. And Merry Christmas. Even though it's late. |
jim9nin | Re: Re: Re: Re:, 12-30-04 9:20pm and on another note that last part...really...tugs at your heart strings man. Almost like...no...no...little brudda. *sobs* He can make it on his own. |