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holdme (profile) wrote,
on 1-12-2006 at 6:05pm
Subject: Hold on
now. You two.

Do you know how much I miss you?
You were everything. I didn't think about you as much as I should have. And I lost you. We had everything in common. I don't know why I was so selfish. I don't know you now. It hurts so much.
I miss our card games. Speed, Egyptain, War... they ment more than it seems like.
I miss our chess. I'd basically force you to... then you got good... and I was horrible! -.-
I miss puyopuyo.
I miss our sleepovers. It was never weird sleeping in the same bed.
I miss our talks. We could cover everything in the universe by dinner time... how can this be? How did I stop this? How can I start it again?
I miss you more than anything. Except for the next one.

As for you... I really really care. You had been with me forever it seemed... I couldn't remember a time when we weren't friends. When you come back... we won't be. I cried to Ryan last night about you.
I miss our talks. Sexual innuendo, however crude or rude, we could always laugh together.
I miss our DDR. You were always better than me. But I loved you because you helped me made me get better.
I miss our sleepovers. "Retard it" "Pringles top" "I'm sorry, but your fingers are tooooooo faaaat, for a special dialing wand, please press one." Remember the one where you had been playing SIMs the entire day previous? Then you yelled in your sleep in sim lingual... I was afraid you were going to murder me.
I miss our board games. You always played LIFE with me no matter how much you were sick of it.
I miss our card games. You slapped with your nails and won every time. Never a poor sport.
I miss your air. I miss just... being around you. You always asked what was the matter~it seemed like you really cared.
I miss you more than anything. Except for the previous one.

I don't think I'm as much work as I used to be.
Loosing these two ladies were the mistakes of my life.
I've cried gallons over them~good and bad~irrational and rational.
I just... overreacted. I can't tell you how much I'm sorry. I can't explain how much I've grown up. I can't express all of my regret.
It was all about me.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry...

I love you both,
Lauren
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