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|kit_Katt (profile) wrote, |
on 3-18-2003 at 9:45pm
|Current mood: Frustrated with a hint of confusion, in a bouncy s
Music: I hope you dance-LeeAnn Wolmack
Subject: I wish I knew....
|I am happy.
Yeah, I can honestly say that. But there is still something in the back of my mind, nagging. I hate naggings. Because I usally know Who's nagging, and He doesn't leave me alone.
"But Lord, what can I say to her? She doesn't even want me anymore."
"Trust me." He says back.
"How can I approach it, she ignored me before."
"Trust me." He replies.
Grrr, I try, I tried, but I still don't know what to say. Everything seems wrong, accusing. Should I just email her that past entry? No, then it would seem like I am just digging up the past, but then, it did have a lot of good points in it, but then, Nick just thought I was kicking him when he was down. *Sigh* Why do I always have to feel like I have to change things? Why do I feel like I can't tell her that I almost cried when I hugged Jackie on Friday night because I was so happy to see her? Why am I so afraid Connie will be upset with me if I tell her that I can't be her best friend anymore because it stresses me to greatly? That I feel I can't be a Christian around her? Why can't she listen, instead of doing her own way, all the time?
"Trust Me." God says. And I will, but I am not Connie's jester anymore. I'm sorry, I really am. *turns and walks away with tears in eyes*.
I wish I was a Jesus Girl.
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Kate sweetie you are a Jesus girl! I know you are! My faith has wavered so much that you look like a Roman god compared to me! I'm sorry, I know what it's like to leave a friend. A really good friend too. I've done it more than once. Keep them in your prayers and heart and remember that God loves them just as much as you and wants them to be happy, and wants you to be happy, so He'll do what he can to get you to be happy together.
Thank you, Shinigami, 03-19-03 6:28am
Thank you so much Jackie. I'm glad that I never let go of you. ^_^ Thank you for staying with me, through everything, and believing in me, even when I didn't believe in you. Thank you for staying strong.
Re: Thank you, Shinigami, 03-19-03 3:18pm
No need to thank me, just be my friend and a friend to Connie. That's all I ever ask. Well, most of the time. ^_^;
Kate.. I've noticed that you don't really wanna hang around me as much.. so I've been trying to... respect that or honor that and leave you alone. I figure you have Brianna and she'll be a better friend to you than me. *shrugs* Even tho it brings tears to my eyes.. I've known this was comming.....But Kate... I still love you and will always wish you the best and wish you happiness.