::
2008 1 March :: 7.40 pm
:: Mood: crushed
OH MY FUCKING GOD.
Okay, it's official. My family life is over. I can't stand any of them, get me out of here before I blow.
Mom is flying to Reno this month to marry OD. She wants me to come with her. I am going to die.
I told her the only way that'll happen is if I can bring a friend. But I'll be frank, it's either Nick or Kelsey, and Kelsey is the one I'd rather have out there with me. I think I'm going to have a panic attack. Seriously.
There is like a 3% chance of me being able to stomach this whole scene. Even if I do I'm going to have to move out. The only reason I stayed here was because I was convinced that she'd outgrow him. But no, she'd regressed to match him.
What am I going to do?
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 28 February :: 11.58 am
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: "Pull the String" by Sexual Frustration
She's got clepto! (hold onto your underware)
If I were irish I would be more awesome. But I'm not, so I have to learn french. Because I'm half french, and it's a prettier language than german. No-one like a german lover. Except that one kid, but he's gay now. D:
"Hold on tight! It's a rollarcoster ride we're on..."
Today has been so freaking boring. Other than Kevin is back. Oh, and he's a retard. XD No, I kid I kid.
Um um um um um ummmm I dunno. I never say anything epic in here. I should. Unfortunately I don't think about slinkies. Because I'm not 5 years old and still breastfeeding.
Oh, need some ice for that burn?
-Nee
1 ~~~~~ |
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 27 February :: 11.55 am
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: "Into the Ocean" Blue october
I gave my heart to you, but it's in two (I can't find the other half!)
"Let the hurricane set in motion..." "Let the rain come down."
I'm listening to Blue October's song "Into the Ocean". I feel like my chest is crushing my lungs. This song makes me smell Jon's skin and I hate it. I hate the way that my body reacts to his image, and I hate that I remember that day in his car driving home after I'd pinned him on the couch and sung him to sleep so I wouldn't have to go home as soon. I hate that I can feel the sun on my skin as I slid my arm around his shoulder. I hate that he handed me that beautiful ring to prove to me that he'd always love me and that he wanted to marry me. I hate that I started crying, and I hate that I put the ring on the wrong hand because I was so emotional. I hate that he promised to lend me Blue October's CD, even if it was Izzie's. I hate that when I hear "Hate me Today" I remember that it was his song to Izzie.
I hate that all I ended up being was a notch in his bedpost. I hate that after that night we got pulled over after buying condintioner for my sex hair, I thought that I had my life in check. I hate that he's the one I compair all of my lovers to.
I hate that I'm thinking of all this, after I spent so much time thinking I was over it. I thought that I was over it, I swear. - sigh -
Oh god, I'm going to cry. "1000 Words" from FFX2 is playing. This one always gets me. Nevermind, I switched it. "SOS" by Jonas Brothers.
Anyway, AO needs to get here. I want to get that over with so I can see where my lovelife will bring me. Oh yeah, and I want to party hardy. :D
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 24 February :: 11.47 pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: "Lover Lay Down" by Dave Mathiews Band
Kiss me... won't you kiss me now?
EDIT: LUL WUT?
Anyway I got my room pretty clean. It's actually awesomesause.I even paced in it, which is epic. Mind you it wasn't big enough to make me TOO happy, but I still did some and it's a first.
Oya, mah leggiez hurt. Lulz.
I need more tacks. My posters are lacking support. They need that support, lest they fall.
Kale is cute. He's all like "OMG LOOKIT MEEEEEEEE EEEEE EEEEE EEEE EEE E E E E E E!" and so on. Mummy wants him to have a friend so we might go get him a buddeh this week. She's obsessed with Elephant Rats so it might be one of those. I dunno. I do know, however that I want to build an extention to the cage so that there's more to do. As fun as climbing, jumping, and hanging upside-down most likely is... I want there to be more running room. :3
God he's adorable. And fat. I feed him too much.
School is such a drag.The only reason that I regret not killing myself years ago is that I have to go to school while alive. :<
Oh well, at least I have people who loooooove me. XD
-Nee
PS: Oh fuck yes. I fixed my iPod. I am a goddess.
1 ~~~~~ |
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 22 February :: 3.39 pm
:: Mood: creative
29 blank
I stayed home sick again today, but I feel better now that I'm all caught up on my rest. I had all sorts of interesting dreams, two of which I wish I could go back into... One I don't remember that much, but I still remembered the emotion in it. It was all post apocolyptic and ruins, and I was wearing a beautiful black and white dress. It was a princess cut with a flared skirt, layered in silk and cotton. It was georgeous. I remember putting it on in my room at the apartment, but somehow things get hazy on how I got to this huge hotel. When I'm climbing the stairs I see all of these people curled up and stairing at me like I'm the bane of their existance but still they're reaching to me for help. I get scared and I run up the stairs to the top. The room that I end up in is in shambles and I wrinckle my nose. People rush in and we all run from a fire.
In the other one I see a girl. I don't think it's me, and I don't assume her identity. She sprawls on a flight of short stairs, and leans over to look up the alley that the stairs follow. All of a sudden there is a man and he lays on top of her, she thinks "rat" and lets him lay there. They have a normal conversation anout the war that is ravaging their city and he tries to enter her. It doesn't work and he devotes his attention to speaking. They finish their conversation and he leaves while she's getting up. The scene is calm and very surreal, but suddenly it all get cracked and it goes back to the beginig if the conversation, but this time I can't see them, only their shadows as they talk. Again it goes back to the begining when they part, and I'm in the girl's POV when it ends. Finally the dream continues and the girl walks up the steps to a large lake. I leave her POV, but stay very close to her shoulder as she steps onto a small boat and rows to a tall wall where two more women are standing looking down at her. One woman grins and leaves, and the other pulls out a sword. Suddenly the girl and I are on the wall too, fighting the other woman. She attempts to push the girl off the wall, but the girl latches on to the woman and brings her down into the boat as they fall. I notice that the new woman has blonde hair with pink streaks. The blonde seems to have a total turn around in attitude as she hugs the girl from behind and begins to cry out of fear. I finally notice that the original girl has semi-long blue-purple hair in dark tones. I think she's pretty. They both row back to shore and step off the boat. The man from before walks up and takes them into a building. I have the sudden thought that the blonde looks abit like Kelsey and hope that I look like the darker haired girl. I don't look like her so I look at the man. He's turned into an upright walking rat. I woke up then.
So yeah... figured I'd share.
I'm going to go see Crystal today and watch a movie in theaters. :3
Ciao~
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 21 February :: 3.27 pm
:: Mood: embarrassed
:: Music: "I'm like a lawyer the way I'm always trying to get you off" by Fall out Boy !
Icklenee is losing this battle?
"If I woke up next to you... If I woke up next to you..."
Just got home from the doctor. Appearantly I have a "common" cold. Which is bullshit, as I can barely breath past my gargantuine uvula of death and siffocation. Yuck? Since when do I get sick like this? It's so totally not like me. D:
Been working on my room kinda. I found this awesome unopened pack of blank CDs so mom is skittering around the house looking for CDs to copy. It's pretty cool to me. :3
Meanwhile the doctor's office is being a cunt and taking FOREVER to send my meds down to the pharmacy. It makes me wanna kick a bitch. CUNT PUNT!~ (That's for Nick and Kelsey XD )
~Nee
"The road outside my house is paved with good intentions..." "So hum hallyluya!"
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 20 February :: 11.42 am
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: "Sell me Candy" by Rhinnha
Nee is a quoting Nee.
"I believe in pink, I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner.
I believe in kissing, kissing a lot.
I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong.
I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls.
I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles. "
- Audrey Hepburn
------------------------------------
I feel like I should say somthing high hearted and witty. I won't because I do too much of that anyway. You know?
I want to do somthing life changing. Seriously. I don't want to be cliche` and cure cancer or eliminate world hunger. I want it to change my world. My problem is that I'm already changing so much that the world I'm in is already so new and different. New people and new things to think about.
It's the setting. I want a new one. If I were to leave today, I wonder where I'd go.
To the movies most likely.
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 19 February :: 5.16 pm
:: Mood: creative
Itchi, nee nee nee nee nee nee nee nee nee nee...san?
So in the end I didn't pull any funny business. Of course Peter sauntered over with his skeevy leather coat and ugly haircut RIGHT as I was feeding Kale his weekly treat. Mmmm, carrots. Anyway, I had to balance his PS2 with one hand and make sure Kale didn't hop off of me with the other. In the End Kale was well behaved, and even growled at Peter.
Good boy Kale.
He got a second carrot for that one.
I'm in a fair mood today. It's awesome. Keven and I were talking today and we realized somthing. I'm totally awesome, and he loves to give me cookies and poptarts! Okay, so he just likes to give me Poptarts because I'm whiney and cute, but still! XD Meanwhile, I like to read.
Yeah, didn't see that one coming. :P
Mission of the week: Clean up my room?
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 18 February :: 11.47 pm
:: Mood: cold
Letting Peter get to me, again?
BunNee [SB!] said: Mmmm, call girls are cool. We earn an honest living gracing the poor losers who can't get what they need from normal women.
ChibiSakurachan said: It's okay though, because we're just that nice.
BunNee [SB!] said: Plus face it, we're the girls that every rich teenager sits around the house smoking pot and drinking in the name of.
BunNee [SB!] said: :3
ChibiSakurachan said: Damned pretty! We are the dreams of Waspoids!
BunNee [SB!] said: Oh shit, we need to stop reading Gossip Girl and get laid. XD
ChibiSakurachan said: No kidding. :<
-------------------------------------------------------
Peter has been really getting to me. I admit this because well... it's true. He's called me a callgirl, which is cute because she knows I think they're cool. Oh well, can't expect him to remember little things like that. Cassie remembers, obviosuly. XD
It'd suck if I was at Promo-committee when he's supposed to pick up his PS2. Lawl, remembering little things like a club that we're both in would be silly, no?
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 18 February :: 2.08 am
:: Mood: accomplished
Talking to Peter about his PS2.
technowonder Wrote: Bring it Tusday if you forget it on Monday.
[Orichalcum] Wrote: I'm not your delivery girl. Come get it yourself, you get the same policy that every dumb ex of mine gets: Want it back, get it back. I hate men who don't fight for what they want.
technowonder Wrote: I dont fight what isnt worth fighting for, if its in your locker then tell me and il come to pick it up. Wow dense girls are every where.
[Orichalcum] Wrote: Well well, if you don't feel like fighting for your poperty then I would be happy to lift the burden from your obviously heavey shoulders. I wouldn't mind, really. What part of I'm not your delivery girl anymore do we not understand? It's not in my locker. You want it, you come and get it from my house. Just make sure you call in an appointment, I'm such a busy girl as of late.
technowonder Wrote: I happen to like my PS2 alot, that was not what I was refering to. Il get it on Tusday at 5 pm after school. Be there or Il have your mother get it. There is no way that I'm letting it stay with some one like you. Tusday at 5. I cant belive that you are so conceded even as the bitch you are. Your just like the rest of them. I should thank you for saving me from your hellish grasp.
[Orichalcum] Wrote: Alright then, you'll have it at 5, just don't be late. I leave for nightschool at 5:15 so that I can go the long way to school for a walk with my iPod. Jogging is the only thing worth going back to school for.
I'm the biggest bitch in the world, mate.
But at least I'm able to piss without my mommy's premission.
technowonder said: You can also fuck and get pregnate with out her premission too. Man what a shitty future you have. It actually makes me laugh.
--------------------------------
This would be so much less ammusing if I had gotten any since September. :D
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 16 February :: 2.20 am
:: Mood: amused
"You, woman! Let me see your pink thing!"
Yay for Valentine's day making things less complicated.
Thomas is back to hating women and being jealous of my male friends so he's stopped talking to me.
Gealan (gey-face) decided that I'm an ugly person, so he's focused his energies on ANOTHER girl (poor thing). This is amusing to me, other than me wanting to hug his new target.
And Nick still likes me as far as I know. At least he hasn't insulted me in any way. I like him more and more. XD We'll see what happens.
Anyway, I feel fat so I'mma go sleepie. XD See everyone at the Forever Fantasy dance!
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 14 February :: 9.29 am
:: Mood: crazy
Do the mash- potato!
Oh jesus I am a tired Nee.
But a happy I am.
Crystal got Gaelan and I to go with her to get her lippy pierced, it was fun. She was all nervous, but she tried to hide it from us, and we were all like “GO CISSY!” and she got it done. She loves it. I’m glad.
Then we went to China Buffet and ate our hearts out. I found a little octopus and played with him all the way until we were about to leave. XD His name was Octopar and he was a destroyer of icecream cups everywhere. Sadly he drown in Gaelan’s soup. D:
The we went to my house and watched Hairspray which was epic. Crys and I danced and sang while Gaelan laughed at us wobbling in high heels. They actually didn’t end up leaving my apartment and eventually drove me to school. Oh yeah, we forgot to sleep. Whoops.
So I’m so ultra tired. Gosh school is sucking, and I have more tonight. Oh well, I’ll hang out with Nick tomorrow and forget that I was going to pass out today.
Yay short memory!
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 12 February :: 9.05 am
:: Mood: amused
Much ado about love songs and sappy cards.
Another update from your friendly neiborhood Nee. :3
So this week is creepily busy. Weird that the Valentine's day I choose to not have a boyfriend would be the one that men are all trying for flutter their feathers in my face in hopes for a mate. Okay fine, it's logical, but it's weird for me. I've never been so wanted. Friends all want my attentions too, how interesting. At anyrate, I'm secretly liking the attention that I'm getting. I went with Nick to hang out with his sister yesterday and he admitted his crush on me (with chocolates no less) and I just kinda blushed at him. I've had a crush on him since we met, though it didn't grow into my current interest until Peter fucked me over. Nick's really swell. We have a lot in common, which makes me wonder if we're too alike to stay friends? I mean... Crystal and I are often the same and we always end up fighting (not lately. We're being good girls to each other, it's a relief...) and I'd hate for that to happen between me and Nick. He's a good friend if nothing else!
As cute as that may sound, I have a small date tomorrow with my friend Gealen, with Crystal tagging along. Mind you I don't really want it to be a date, but he's practically splooging with excitement for the little get together. I like the interest, I'm a little cocky bitch but things are just too complicated. I don't WANT a boyfriend right now, if I did I would go out with Nick because well, first dibs and all. Gealen's cute and all but he's not my type. Ironic that I'm thinking about turning down an Irish man. I hear they're great in bed. D:
Then there's Thomas. Oh goodness Tomcat you're a funny guy. He's the one that Beau was convinced of my cheating on him with. This is so totally unfunny because (OMG!) Tomcat lives in KENTUCKY. I like him, but it's not the kind of like that would make me interested in a long distance fling. But as I said before, I LOOOOOOVE this attention I'm getting.
This is all so complicated that I really shouldn't be laughing about it all, but hell. I'm a humor-full girl. Shyah.
AO is coming up, isn't it? Oh goodie. What should I wear?
Okay now I'm just doing random thoughts. D:
ANYWAY: I have night school tonight and on Thursday which is sad because I had to turn down another offer from a boy named James for a date. Mind you I don't really like this guy at all, but I still hate turning people down. D: Plus it'd be nice to hang out on "Singles Appreciation Day" with some friends. Oh well, you win some you lose some.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 10 February :: 3.51 pm
:: Mood: chipper
"Seeeeeervent boooy Niiiiiick~"
Yawnyawnyawn.
Ho-hum. Nee is a tired Nee. Been talking to Gaelan for awhile after waking up at like 1:30ish. I ended up helping Nick's family throw a party for his sister-face Kera yesterday so I'm pooped.
I was hanging with Nick on Friday, played me some Norath when we wandered downstairs for drinks. I see Nick's mommy (Eedi?) fluttering around being all stressed out. She explains that she's behind on the party preperations and there is little time or help or her to finish things. I pipe up and offer to set up, since I take orders well and try my best. She's all like "Omigosh yes!" but Nick is like "Uuuuugh, I don't want to drive out to Nee's house in the freaking morning D: " (Because the party was the next day). So mommy Eedi tells me to stay the night so baby Nick wouldn't get all butthurt and so I could help out. So I do stay the night. Long story short I helped out extra much because mommy got hurt and so I was essential. Yay I was important.
Kera's party was pwnsome, even of Nick's friend Laura was waaaaaaay rude to me. I mean obviously because I'm helping with the party I HAVE to be dating Nick /sarcasim. Everyone is assuming this. What the fuck people? Do we all assume I'm a slutface? I just broke up with Peter for god's sake. Jeeeeebz.
Otherwise I came home, gamed until like 8 in the morning then slept in. But I said that already. D:
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 7 February :: 11.55 pm
:: Mood: distressed
Pink pink pink pink pink?
So I just woke up crying from a serious nightmare. It was... oh jesus it was a scary one. I'm covered in a cold sweat, jesus. I am so flustered right now... I kinda want to talk to someone for comfort but no-one's responding to my IMs. T-T
Gah, the shakes.
How freaking troublesome.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 7 February :: 4.48 pm
:: Mood: exhausted
You're a terrible shot and you have a small penis!
Today was... anti-climactic.
I broke up with Peter in the most violent rude way possible. That way, I have pissed him off enough that I won't dare run back sniffling again. I swear if I was as rude to men as I am to women I would never have to deal with my exs ever.
I'm going to go stuff me face now.
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 7 February :: 12.17 am
:: Mood: cranky
Not now, he's busy.
Okay, that's fucking it. Do I just send out that asshole vibe? Seriously? Do I open myself up for asshole and bitches and fucking FUCKS?
I'm in school, waiting for Peter and putting my coat away. He shows up and just kinda stands there not making a move. We wander off together hand in hand, my looking out at the windows full of snow loving the snow, Peter just kinda speeding ahead as usual. Whatever. We wander back to B hall and he makes some stupid comment about trashing some stupid dollar project his teacher put up. I freak out because everytime we walk down this hall he HAS to make a comment on the fucking thing. I tell him "Oh my god, it's a fucking assignment, deal will it. Everyone in the class had theirs put up!" and look at him with annoyence. He's always talking about it, trying to get my attention at his work, and it's stupid to use self insult to do it.
Fast forward to break. I'm in 202 chilling, and decide that I'm hungry. I'm still annoyed at Peter because he's acting cold at me so I skitter over for a quick kiss so I can go off by myself to get a thingie in the caffiteria. He refuses me. He tells me to try again later.
So I twitch and swallow a large ammount of "FUCK YOU!" and go off to eat. Luch comes around and he ignores me for the whole period. I ask for a kiss at the end and I get a no-eye-contact "Not right now. I'm busy." So I walk out, again swallowing an even bigger ammount of "FUCK YOU! I'M NOT GOING TO BE TREATED LIKE SHIT OVER YOUR FUCKING ART!". Classes go as usual and after school comes. I'm pretty much pissed beyond words by now.
I see Peter coming at me. He opens my mouth and I shove my hand in his face and say "NO!" and continue walking. It was the ONLY thing that kept me from breaking up with him then and there. I'm still angry at him. SO SO SO angry at him. I don't know what I'm going to do yet. I know I made a stink over him not being with me, but now I'm regretting it. I was sick.
Perhaps that was all it was. I needed someone to take care of me. He can't so it though, not at all. He can't even enter my house.
What a hassle.
-Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 3 February :: 9.59 pm
:: Mood: calm
Wet T-shirt contest?
My weekend was pretty busy. How amazing.
Friday was a Fandi meeting, and I went and saw Crystal and met her friend Nick. Meeting was long and kinda boring ( but it was prolly just me being tired that made it seem long ) but afterwards Crystal and I conned Nick into a ride home. Jeenna came as well and we went to McDonalds and gabbed (All four of us + one of Crystal's brothers) for awhile. Somehow we decided to go molest WalMart so we galavanted over and messed around for afew hours. Took Jeenna home, and C + N + Me ended up at Crystal's house where we all talk about random things. N eventually left and Crystal and I slept for awhile.
Saturday was me finding a way home, then calling Kelsey to drag her to another Fandi meeting so that I could have her as my minion. The meeting went well, but I stood around too much and got sore in the knees. Afterwards Nick wanted us all to hang out again, but we all argued about the snow and things got mixed up. Regardless I conned Nick into taking Kelsey and myself back to my house. When we got there we all watched some Anime and played some Norath because Nick was freaked about the icy roads. Crystal was going to pop in at some point, but home stuff made her have to give me a raincheck on the hangout time, which is okay. I totally understand this one. ( - hugs Crystal if she's reading - )
Sunday was boring. Kelsey and I slept in and kinda dawdled around for awhile. Super bowl stuff was going on so I wandered off to a get together so I wouldn't get all lonely and such. It was fun. Even if I don't care even a litle bit about football.
Now I'm tired. So I'm going to go sleepy time.
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 31 January :: 11.11 pm
:: Mood: content
:: Music: "Confessions of a Futon Revolutionist" by The Weakerthans
"...the wall you painted purple..."
Eeeeeer, hectic week. XD
Monday: Got back together with Peter.
Tuesday: Had a Promoclub meeting, then made out with Peter behind the baseball feild. It was fun, and spontainious.
Wednesday: Had a SNOW DAY~ It was pimp. Peter and I went to see "August Rush" and I smiled so hard through the whole movie that my face hurts.
Thursday: Nothing note worthy. XD
Um, tomarrow is a new day. And I'll take it as it comes.
Wow that was corney.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 26 January :: 3.31 pm
:: Mood: mellow
Wanna play cops and robbers?
So appearantly my frever broke last night and this allowed me to recover and a disgusting rate in order to be able to actually get up and go do things today. Not alot of things, mind you.
I showered for the first time in -almost- a week (tomarrow would be a week).
I got dressed in somthing that wasn't Pajamas (it's been since Tuesday)
I ate shit. (Been doing this since thursday, but YANNO)
Cleaned Kale's cage and changed his water.
Got raving made at a bitch cunt who wouldn't walk across my hall to the stairs because I was in the bathroom looking at my forehead with the door open because she "Didn't want to get anything, because she's not like me."
Oh yeah. And appearantly I spilled my guts to Peter last night. Well hell, this might not end well either.
Now excuse me while I go play with my SIMS and dry my hair.
~Nee
PS: Thomas is a cutie-face.
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 24 January :: 5.42 pm
:: Mood: exhausted
Ick ick ick ick ick ick.
So I got a cold.
That turned into the Flu.
Which evolved into pneumonia.
Which fucking sucks. I hate not seeing people. D:<
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 20 January :: 11.26 pm
:: Mood: drained
He wanted Crystal all along.
So in the end, I ended up sick.
Like... throat hurting, ears acheing, nose running, phlem coughing, lungs filled with yuck, skin pointed with needles - Sick.
But, I hung with Crystal, Played RO, Saw Ana, PWNED DDR, Failed in a really girly way at Pump it Up, saw Cody and his jolly band of hooligans, got snow in my shoes, and admitted to being a pervert.
So it was worth waiting to come home, therefore making me ten times sicker in the end.
Oh god headache. I'm outta here.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 19 January :: 3.15 am
:: Mood: calm
Pink Tow-trucks.
So-ho. Guess who's sitting in MY bed tonight.
Oh, you'll never guess.
Go ahead and try. I promise I'll tell you if you're right.
...
...
...
Oh? Not quite ready for it? Okay, I'll tell you.
It's Crystal. Like, Crystal Ince. Yup. Beat that.
Othernews, the Fandi Valintine's event is coming up, and I've got flyers. Yo, Imma hand those out soon. Yay.
I need to call Kelsey today. Yay. I'm tired. Oh well. After Crystal leaves.
Talking with her is making me miss things. Lots of things. Lots of things that I don't do anymore. Ironicly enough... none of those things were actually done with Crystal... but it's okay because that's not so bad.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 17 January :: 6.53 pm
:: Mood: drained
Post Secrets
I'm so... depressed.
In school today we had to write and illistrate a Post Secret Postcard. It was all yanno... annonomys. But still it got me thinking about all sorts of secrets, and lord do I have alot of them. Well, it all resulted in me being pretty upset... >_>
I couldn't seem to calm down enough to seem cheerful after class actually ended... and people saw me upset... how torublesome. I didn't want anyone to see me crying, I just wanted to run to my locker and get out so I could go home and calm down.
But Peter saw me crying. Most of all I didn't want him to see me crying. Which of course made me cry harder... and then he hugged me.
And my skin crawled because I knew that if I moved even an inch I would throw my arms around him and not let him go. How.. troublsome. I miss him.
Here's a Secret:
I've been having dreams about Peter. Alot of them. And Panic Attacks. Alot of them.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 13 January :: 4.10 pm
:: Mood: cold
A Sunday Quicky
Go sledding
Make a Snow Angel (DONE)
Have a Snowball fight (DONE)
WIN! a Snowball fight (DONE)
Fall on my ass
Slide across the street while still standing
Buy a Hat...
Drink Hot Coco (DONE)
Build a Snowman (DONE)
____________________________________________
I bought my AO tickets over the weekend, as did Kelsey. There was a mix-up and we had to run around to get her's fixed, but things went okay.
Went to see Brian the other night. It was ammusing. I protected Kelsey's virtue from an avalanche of falling dude, and found out that my breathing problem is still up and kicking. I got depressed at the end, and had a blow up at Kelsey... but we talked about it.
Now I'm very... disgruntled. It seems to be the new hit thing to BLOW NEE OFF. Oh yay, Kelsey didn't come back to keep her promise today. Nope. I told her three times yesterday what time it was gunna go down, and even messaged her with the time. SHE TOLD ME TO MESSEGE HER with the time. So I did. What'd she do? Not bother to check her messages. Go her.
Fuck me.
The usual.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
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2008 8 January :: 10.17 pm
:: Mood: annoyed
Another one for the history books.
Dear Boise School District,
What the fuck are you thinking? Do you realize that you are the only district NOT having a school day? Do you realize how DANGEROUS you're being? Do you want people to die on those roads that you're not too worried about? Everyone is having a snow day, except us. We have the icyest roads. There is more frozen slush than anywhere else.
When I'm sitting in class with my arms crossed, frowning at your dumbass mistakes and holding my breath is people that I know are fighting to get to your stupid desision of a school, I'm going to be cursing with passion. If anyone I know dies or gets hurt, you will pay. If there are some many people leaving school or not even coming, you will pay. I made a choice to stay in school so I wouldn't ruin my life like Beau. If you ruin my life with your dangerous decision to make us brave the weather... you will pay.
Love,
Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
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2008 8 January :: 5.47 pm
:: Mood: nostalgic
:: Music: "Bark at the Moon" by Strung Out
Nee's Winter To-Do list.
Go sledding
Make a Snow Angel (DONE)
Have a Snowball fight
WIN! a Snowball fight
Fall on my ass
Slide across the street while still standing
Buy a Hat...
Drink Hot Coco
Build a Snowman (DONE)
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It's been snowing almost non-stop all day, and most of yesterday. This means that I am almost constantly cheerfull as I walk home and sigh while staring out the window. I adore the snow, no matter how I complain about being cold. Oddly enough being single in winter is less depressing than I thought it would me.
Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm still sad about how things happened, but it's my fault that Peter and I are broken up, and I think that my cheery mask is best for everyone (see? I can pretend too!)
I've been doing little things around my room to get more orginized. It's silly most of the time. Like... I re-arranged my foampost-board so that my pictures aren't touching my old ticket stubs and so forth. Also I put my bedside shelves back in order and threw away some papers that were sitting around my desk. I fixed my printer too. Need to orginize my video shelf and get around to my closet (other known as the hell zone...) and hang up some clothes. Mind you those are all very little things, but oh well. It'll all be better little by little.
Keeping busy is good for me.
I really want to eat at Red Robin tonight, I wonder if I should call someone to go with me. Hmn, choices choices.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
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2008 7 January :: 1.08 am
:: Mood: depressed
Fuck you, Orochimaru.
I saw Hinata fight. She was pwnsome.
Watching Naruto made me realize some things. (As Anime tends to do at three in the moring)
First: I hate Naruto as a show. Naruto as a character is kinda annoying, but I deal with that.
Second: I hate Naruto because it's all about setting goals in life and working with all your might to achive them.
Third: I have no goals.
Fourth: I've been putting off the fact that I don't want to go to fucking collage. Not even the smallest bit. I've kinda been winging it at this point because face it kids. I've lives four more years then I was supposed to. This journal is proof of that.
Fifth: I take things for granted, like the sharp and cutting pain that shoots through my lower back when I cry. I realized that it's because I don't get to sob often. I live in apartments with thin walls, so I've always just kinda figured it'd be rude if I bothered my neibors with my sadness. So I cry without sound. This is just habit now, and even in places that I should be able to cry I end up just letting tears flow without much other movement. I think that I tense up so much in my back that the muscles get tired before I even start. That's a pain. Or the thinger in my foot. It's the most painfull thing I've ever felt, but I always forget that it's there because I've had it for like a year and feeling it when I walk is also kinda second nature. That also is a pain in the ass.
Sixth: I am so totally not wanting to go back to school. It's for a terrible reason. I don't want to explain to Ana and Trey why I broke up with Peter. I think I'll just look whistfull and say it's between the two of us. If he wants to talk to them, he can. But it's not in my sanity levels to deal with it.
Seventh: I'm going to miss Peter's PS2. ToT;;; That's selfish but true.
Oh well. I make all sorts of revelations these days.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
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2008 6 January :: 8.54 pm
:: Mood: chipper
Fwipple-deezle.
I got around to dying my hair. It turned Blue.
Blacky Blue.
Which is cool. I like it alot. :3
I go back to school tomarrow. Whoopie-whee.
I'm in a good mood right now. Wow.
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
::
2008 6 January :: 12.30 pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: "Black Wave" by the Shins.
Post Cards from my Room
Woke up today and had an intense need to snuggle. Found that this emotion was easily pushed aside due to total hate over everyone that isn't Ana, Kelsey, Trey, Robbie, or Peter.
What improvment.
Spent the evening texting Kelsey and watching Naruto because I'll be damned if I don't see Hinata fight in one freaking episode. I'm on seson four... still no luck.
I ate too much and felt sick, and still feel sick. I have a beerbelly to hobble back to school with. Oh grandious torture.
Getting my hair dyed black again today, so I don't feel like a creepy discolored dog. My eyebrows will be less noticable and that will make everyone around me be more happy because then my mood will impove and rainbows will fly out of my butt to head dead cats on the sides of roads.
It's true. Just watch.
Oh yeah. Also, Rubido had a brain tumor so we had to put him down. That's depressing too. +sigh+
~Nee
(Comment) Baaaaaaaaahhhhh! |
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