:: 2010 3 March :: 7.35 pm
:: Mood: enthralled

To be in love.
I am almost positive that I have no idea what love actually feels like anymore.
It's not Jon's fault, it's my own.

People think it should be so easy to move on. It's not.
People think I should fight to get Jon back if I love him so much. I won't.

Isn't love supposed to be wanting that person to be happy, and to have an easy life? I thought so, so I let him go. This Ashley woman is easy. She is all the things he wants right now. She is manipulated, and ugly, no-one would have her but him. She wanted someone to say those things, and he will. For afew months, for afew years. He'll be all the things that I love about him, and he'll move on leaving a trail of hearts behind him. She will support him, and she will let him have his child lust. I'm sure she doesn't even have the pride to keep him in check, to make sure he's loyal.

He will get all the things he's ever wanted.
Everything but me.
I'm such a small thing though, it's fine. All of these things he traded for me. They are good. He will tell everyone he's happy.

Beau told me once: "I had to make people think I was happy. I didn't have you, it was all that kept me together."
Like Beau, Jon who loves me will run away because I am too loving and too overwhelming. Who can say it's right that I am so used to this?

Who knows?

<3

:: 2010 16 January :: 1.45 am
:: Mood: bouncy

Choo choo!
Hey guys! Here's a public one to promote my bad writing. XD
I have started a writing journal for all of my brain dump needs. :D

Omg look at my ghetto fab button. XD Anyway yes, feel free to go read it, or avoid it like the plague! Whatever!

<3

:: 2009 25 November :: 11.51 am
:: Mood: cheerful

FRIENDS ONLY
This Journal is PRIVATE, and if only readable if I add you to my friendslist. I wouldn't mind adding anyone who comments this post, or friends me.

-AM

<3