DO THIS BEFORE READING MORE: Add "Jessa" to your list of intrests. Why, you ask? Because Jessa is the Coolest person in the Universe, if you don't think so You Suck!!! Love you Jessa.


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:: 2006 2 February :: 9.25 pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: Whatever Bucky is listening too...

I am a horrible person!
So yeah... i haven't updated in ages (as you can see). Xanga sucked me in....I feel like such a traitor.

LIfe has been crazy.

School, Guys, Partys, Finding a new Job, everything. I don't even know where to start so I guess I'll just tell everyone to go to if you wanna know what I've been up too.

and I'll try to update here more often....


1 Opened Door | Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 23 October :: 10.43 pm

You're Element is Earth. You like plants and
flowers and have a very natural looking beauty
so you really don't need make up. You are a
very innocent and maybe naive person but it's
only the jerks in this world that take
advantage of you because you are a jewel in
this world of rocks. You have many friends and
they all enjoy you as much as you do them. You
are skilled with your hands and would be able
to last in a more remote home.

What's Your Element(girls)? (PICTURES)
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Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 23 October :: 10.37 pm


?? Which Alcoholic Drink Are You ??
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Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 18 October :: 5.22 pm

What is your inner-hair color?


You are intelligent and beautful. You are Nature! Down to earth and caring, you are good at giving advice.

Personality Test Results

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Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 10 October :: 9.52 pm

I need to make better choices...

I've officially decided that I'm not going to make anymore stupid choices. No more sex, no more weed, a cutback in drinking, etc. I need to clean up my act and stop being stupid and find real happiness.

My friends are starting to worry about me so I know what I'm doing to myself is affecting them and that's not cool with me. I'm the problem solver, not the problem creator.

I don't think I'm going to hang out with Buck as much. Might cutback on going to Java Jack's, it's getting way crowded in there anyways. I'm deffinately going to try breaking away from Bobby also. That will be hard until December but I can do it.

Jack I'm not going to be able to get away from, and I don't want to. He's awesome. I'm just going to be smarter when I'm around him from now on. I'm going to have Drew and Chrissy make sure of that.

I have discovered that my friends really do care about me with everything I've been doing lately though. That truly does help make me happier and want to stop hurting them with my choices.

I just wish I completely understood why I made the choices I did. Drinking is fine, all my friends join me with that one so I'm not really worried about it. The weed with Jack was a "gotta try it once" kind of moment, probably won't happen again. The unprotected sex with guys I don't really know much about on the other hand is what could be the most dangerous for me, and that's the main reason of everyone's worry. I promised Connie that I would stop. I'm going to do my hardest to live up to that promise.

Today is the starting of a better me... I hope.

God help me with this.

Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 10 October :: 9.38 pm

Do this now!
Add the word 'jessa' to your woohu interests.

Do it.... because Jessa is the coolest person in the universe!
And everyone should love her!

2 Opened Doors | Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 5 October :: 12.28 am

Currently Listening: Stuff from Java Jack's... Fricken Awesome Shit!

Deffinately hungout with Buck all afternoon. It was pretty fun. I think we kinda finally broke our communication issues. And some of his friends are starting to know me a little and I'm feeling more accepted by them. Yay for me.

Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 2 October :: 8.55 pm

I had a fucking awesome weekend!
Friday night Drew left me for Jack...Asshole! Lol. But I hung out with Chrissy, Brandon, Connie, Jeff, Ryan and Brian. I got drunk off my ass. The craziest thing was when Brian called the house at 1:30am and needed us to come pick him up from Belmont. That was funny as hell. He's just damn lucky I was able to understand what the hell he was saying after 10+ beers and some Smirnoff Screwdrivers and that Chrissy was still sober enough to drive. Saturday I was in town all day for Red Flannel stuff. I sunburnt my face...oh well at least it wasn't snowing this year! Saturday night I went couples bowling with Brian, Drew,and Katie. It freaked Brian out when I had to bowl between his legs! It was funny as hell. I love that Brian is 21... While bowling we split 2 pitchers of beer. He was crunked! My first impression of Katie wasn't all that great. Her friends are even worse (more stuck up) I think, but I'm not going to stop Drew from anything. I'll just tell him that I told him so... I can be such a bitch sometimes!

I deffinately decided I want to hangout with Brian more often. I just have to make sure I don't end up with a crush on him because I don't need that many issues in my life right now.

Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 26 September :: 10.56 pm

Well I can feel the stress for the week building already. Multiple projects to work on for design, the first exam in Turf, a math test and complete chaos in my english class because no one knows what the hell is going on. YAY! And now Bobby doesn't think he'll be coming to Cedar this weekend...grr and arrg at him!

Yeah Allen deffinately just tore into me about needing to stop all the casual/friends with benefits sex that I have because he doesn't want to see me get hurt. I know he's probably right, but there is no way I can just completely cut ties with Bobby right now. It's going to be hard enough to do that in December when he leaves....

2 Opened Doors | Choose my Destiny

:: 2005 14 September :: 11.00 pm
:: Mood: depressed

So yeah... I haven't updated in a while...I should do that.
Life is ____________.

Lately I'm not really sure how to fill in the blank.

I'm back at Ferris. I'm glad to be out of Cedar most of the time. I miss some of my friends, yet there are others that I really don't miss at all. Sad I know, but when they don't even care to ask why I'm not happy with them, why should I believe I'm their "Best Friend" and give them my time? ....Does that make me sound like I'm 14 again?...

School has been slightly stressful thus far. Three weeks in and I'm behind on homework, and already not wanting to get up for class. I deffinately need to figure that issue out before it becomes a huge problem.

I am meeting a lot more new people so far this year. Which is nice, I need to expand my circle of friends beyond Cedar and a few other small unknown places in Michigan.

Speaking of small unknown places... My friend Bobby (aka my casual sex guy from our senior year and this summer) from Ithaca, is leaving for basic training for the Navy on Tuesday, Sept. 20th. He's having a going away party Saturday, I can't wait to see him, but leaving will be hard. I'm really going to miss him. I've gotten used to talking to him at least a couple times a week lately and now I won't be able to talk to him for 9 weeks, then he'll be gone another 4 years.... Damn the government and their ways of getting people to do things for them with the promise of money for college....

Anyway, back to new friends. I'm actually spending time with my suitemate, we shared a bathroom last semester and hardly talked to each other. My roomate has a couple people that come over to our room a couple times a week so I'm becoming friends with them, and I've met up with some people that I haven't seen in 5 or 6 years and have been hangingout with them. Maybe if I play my cards right I could end up with a boyfriend out of the deal...

I'm deffinately sick of being single, yeah casual sex works for the moment but it's not what I really want or need anymore. I want a real relationship and to stop putting myself into situations that just end up hurting me.

Well I think I'm done with my update for now. The chance that anyone who actually reads this will care about much of it will be pretty small anyways. So yeah..

Life is _________. Still happening.

2 Opened Doors | Choose my Destiny | Random Journal