<marquee>...And then she slit her throat on stained glass<marquee>

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...And then she slit her throat on stained glass

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:: 2004 21 November :: 5.45am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: Bizarre Love Triangle//Depeche Mode

know what makes them happy? the things that make you sad
This is a dream
Indescribable beats.

I doubt this will ever be read :P. I won't bother to see how ridiculous my last post here was, yet.

Nothing will stop me.
I love.

I can understand you, all of you. I simply like finding happiness, solace, and creation... it's better. It really is, sometimes. A lot.

We can smile together, I promise. The rifts are still there, yes, but some of them curve and laugh at you...

Passion. The end.

6 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 15 October :: 11.25am
:: Mood: woot
:: Music: dun dun dun

doom!
hello journal :D

Dun dun dun, another one bites the dust.

'Cause he's going the distance, he's going the speed...

Only because I know no one will read this.

:: 2004 19 August :: 11.35am
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Coma White//Manson

today, today, to run away
Simple poetry. Wording of today's thoughts.

"I'm And Idiot."
I'm going to run away from you
But only for today.
You wait so little,
But you're true
At least the words you say.
I wish you weren't so honest
No, I don't wish that at all
I wish you hadn't lost yourself
Inside the free-for-all.
You know I'll beat them any day
You know I'm sugar sweet.
And spice for you,
We'll see this through.
So don't forget to meet.
One more line
The aftermath
I'm stuck here till I'm done.
Remember running in the night,
And don't forget our fun.

:: 2004 9 August :: 6.13pm
:: Mood: doomed
:: Music: doom!

more doom.
This journal has so been abandoned.
And off they went.

:: 2004 17 July :: 7.32pm
:: Mood: Odd
:: Music: The music stopped playing for us

create it like an alien artist
"If only, if only,"
the woodpecker sighs,
"The bark on the tree was just a little bit softer."
While the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely,
He cries to the moo-oo-oon,
"If only, if only."

Oh, that's so beautiful. I read it in a book of poetry years and years and years ago.
I love it, I love the violet wasteland.
:) Mah darling.

:: 2004 15 June :: 3.11pm
:: Mood: wistful
:: Music: Mad World-Gary Jules

fire flashing forward faraway following fire
Little black-and-white butterfly. Smile like you don't care. Twirl around and sit by the window, watching the rain. Write poetry and read books. Paint the walls with your perfection. Walk into a room, and just look at them stare. Smile at every single one of them.
But you don't need to hold the one you long for? No, feeling hollow is not too hard. Bury yourself in sparkle and shine, flowers and sunsets. It's ok to not take the last chance. Your longing can be thrown away. Butterfly.

:: 2004 3 June :: 1.59pm
:: Mood: thoughtful
:: Music: Blue-A Perfect Circle

such a perfect color for you
Sun is shining, catching rays. Squee.
I think I have an art lesson with Shelley today :]. Joy.

I'm writing another story. It's called "The Poet and The Summer Girl." So far, that is. Eee.

I used to dislike APC. Now I don't. Strange.. typical. Glarp.
Love.

4 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 1 June :: 4.20pm

Which Grunge Band Are You?

3 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 1 June :: 2.29pm
:: Music: Magdalena-APC

One kiss, one taste of you my black madonna
Like this. Angel.

:: 2004 31 May :: 3.01pm
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: Are You Afraid of A Blade-Eminem

outsider
outsider
outsider

2 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 23 May :: 9.18pm
:: Mood: dizzy
:: Music: Down in A Hole-Alice in Chains

Sand rains down and here I sit, holding rare flowers...
This is very beautiful song. I listen to it all the time, and it makes me feel like I'm among angels.

I went down to Tuscany's and got stuff and a coke. Then I sat outside and people-watched, and wrote the story of my death. It wasn't morbid, and I think only people "from the outside" (I guess) could find it disturbing. Lol.
I had fun. Go cafes, cameras, and notebooks.

Lol, that idea came up on friday. [lj] The rest of the pics are in my photobucket and at my new lil artistic site. eee.

3 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 23 May :: 6.09pm
:: Mood: bored

rip away at healing scars
[sameness]
Had a wonderful little afternoon fight with them. Exhausting. I'm not studying for finals. -.-.

Took a few fun piccys this morning...
Molly's self-proclaimed gay feet :D

Molly :]

Nick and Miriam

wee o.o

Does Ben like me?

:: 2004 21 May :: 6.46pm
:: Mood: Blah
:: Music: Pig Charmer-Jerry Cantrell

fragments
New photo/art/writing page.

Here's the fast fiction I've been working hard at.. it's rough to me, I really need an opinion and/or editing.

Breakup
Our screaming fight ended abruptly with a few of his icy, numbing words. I became aware of the blank expression on my face a few minutes later, but it seemed like I had been standing in our icy silence for hours. I could feel him peering through me, taking me apart.

I came over and examined his fascinating features, and wiped a few limp, black curls from his forehead. The rays of light covered his face in color, and his frozen ocean eyes pierced through me in such an unnatural way. I softly kissed his delicate lips one last time.

I picked up the head and smashed it into the stained glass window.
--

2 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 19 May :: 6.08pm
:: Mood: contemplative
:: Music: Crossroads-Cream

just to be saying them...
Ay... things are mundane.
So average.

*sigh*
I'm going to write a story. Haven't done that for years.

3 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 16 May :: 8.45pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: Over Now//AIC

going over it over and over until you've lost your way
Here.
A watercolor I did with Lauren a few months ago.

:: 2004 12 May :: 10.15pm
:: Mood: cold

Hurt me
Here I am
Rape me
Let me live
Memory
Rip away
Stinging
Here to stay
Numbness
Hate to feel
Always
Never real
Living
Never true
Whisper
I hate you.
Lying
Killing light
Horror
Hate tonight
Dying
In your eyes
Defeat
Never rise

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 7 May :: 6.34pm
:: Mood: fine
:: Music: Brother//Alice in Chains

"goodbye"
I am... ready to go out with my friends. To that place... something I won't ever do again. I'm relieved. I'm over all the clique-ness... can't wait for summer.
Next week will kick ass.
The week after will kill x.x.
--
Tomorrow is six flags! I'm very excited. It's always fun :D.
--
Magz' house now with the bubble gang... lol.

Hrm.
More INTERESTING updates later. Ta!

:: 2004 4 May :: 6.48pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: what the hell have I/alice in chains

Your paradise illusion-- Keep it close, don't fall apart

:: 2004 2 May :: 9.10pm
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: Over Now-Alice in Chains

In a land where apologies don't exist, you can never make mistakes.

:: 2004 1 May :: 7.05pm
:: Mood: Giggly//hyper
:: Music: APC songs ~.~

Woop woop
My hair! Has been dyed. It's darkest brown, and it glints black. woop woop =) I do love it. My parents WILL murder me, though. HAHAHA. They aren't going to be back till tomorrow night *.*

People, people!
XD
http://www.houstonjusticenotwar.org/articles/terrorist_attack/
If you don't go there... you're missing out. Muchly.

I got motion sickness from reading in a chair yesterday. XD.

Off to the movies with my free pass [score] today, avec brandi et laurel. Aussi, le sleep-over a chez brandi. Tres choutte!

Woop.
My ears hurt =/ But, otherwise.. wonderful, white-cold weather and peacefulness.

Pictures of my newly dyed yed later.

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 30 April :: 9.20pm
:: Mood: nauseated
:: Music: Crossroads-Cream

the way it sturred me up
Ooook.... a bunch of updates here.

At the bookstore, I was reading girl, interrupted... (which by the way, is the second book I read today following "echo") I kept getting these weird hallucinations that my body was pulsing or I was jumping or something.. even though I was sitting in my chair. Then the pages started quivering and I couldn't tell if I was imagining it or not.
So weird.

I don't need to go into details in two different journals.

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 29 April :: 5.25pm
:: Mood: average
:: Music: People Hate Me-Murderdolls

Colorblind
[people hate me//murderdolls]
...
And people hate me, cause I'm better than you
And people hate me, and that's the motherfucking truth
People hate me, and you can all fuck off
I'm perfect, pissed off, beautiful, I'm god
[/lyrics]
--

They are so distant, they don't know true hate...
--
They are so naive, they don't know true tears
--
.:You.made.me.real:.

And if I could I would take your hell and enjoy it...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I'm in a fine mood, everyone... how strange of me! Heh.. woot. My new lj layout is pretty awesome.

Have you ever met someone who's felt so much pain that it makes you feel innocent... and guilty?
--

Damn the outline
--

seriously, I had an averagely good day. I just listened to my ipod in every class. And slept.
I love finishing the fucking standardized test in twenty minutes, while the time given is three hours. Mmhmm =].
--

Can't wait.

:: 2004 28 April :: 5.40pm
:: Mood: Apathetic
:: Music: Down In A Hole//Alice in Chains

Longing for
OK!
=]
MY PARENTS ARE GOING OUT OF TOWN THIS WEEKEND!

Party at Julia's. Hell yes. FREEDOM!

The plan...
Friday>> Arbor with Brandi and Kae, bookstore, buying hair dye
Saturday>>Jackie's at Lake Travis, people coming over to my house and us doing whatever we want wherever.. oh yes. Dying my hair. >=]
Sunday>>Maybe the thing with the place; guitar lesson, movie

Kristen, you might like this...

Lol. I just cut that out because I don't want to offend anyone. Talk to me later.

Here's another clip though...
Adam Carolla: "How tall are you?"
Caller: "Uhh.. 5'12", almost 6 foot"

=D...

THEY'RE GOING OUT OF TOWN!!!!
=).
I still want --- muchly. Muchly. I need to think of something.

<3juliya<3

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 27 April :: 6.59pm
:: Mood: Aggravated
:: Music: People Hate Me-Murderdolls

Mmm. I'm sick of updating and emailing ^^; should've started with this.
Xanga>rainstarfire
lj>starbritepixie

TAKS and people who are just plain stupid not leaving me alone today =).
THEY are going out of town this weekend!
...YES!

Saw a chick flick last night with Arie. It was alright. I never get to pick the movie anyone ever goes to.. so whatever. =];

I wonder why your's are horizontal and mine are vertical... *goes of dazed looking to ponder*

love.

:: 2004 25 April :: 9.54pm
:: Mood: determined
:: Music: Slit My Wrist-Murderdolls

I kept a promise o.o
Wee.
I'm so glad there's one promise I can say I didn't break. I don't really make promises, in general, but... mmhmm..
Makes me think.
I really like Murderdolls. *-*
My fave song of theirs remains "I Take Drugs." LOL. Kick ass.

The words won't come out the right way
It's the same again today
My only wish is that you'd stay
Never stray, never stray
Be my truth

Ay. Decisions, decisions. I can't wait till I get my fucking allowance... 5 days till I have a plan. ::grins:: Twill be awesome.
TWILL!
hehe...
Love.

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 25 April :: 7.54pm
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: angry chair- alice in chains

If I'm left behind, I don't know what I'll do.
It burns.

2 Seductions | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 24 April :: 9.23pm
:: Mood: My head hurts
:: Music: Led Zeppelin

My head hurts x.x
My head hurts.
Ay, now you know! Heh. Gahh.. I need for my head to stop hurting x.x...
Watching Almost Famous. o.0
survey
Abortion?: Yes.
Death Penalty?: It's terrible, uncivilized, and just fucking wrong.
Prostitution?: Sure? If you want to.
Alcohol?: Be careful. Age restriction should be 18.
Marijuana?: Sure. Be careful.
Other drugs?: o.0 I wouldn't inject anything into myself, though. be careful.
Gay marriage?: Yup.
Illegal immigrants?: Yes.
Smoking?: Eh. If you want to.
Drunk driving?: It sucks.
Cloning?: For People? If the clone's gunna have a normal life like a uh.. non-clone o.o.
Racism?: Wrong.
Premarital sex?: Why not? =)
Religion?: Should be respected. But, no one should ever try to convince someone to believe something or tell them something is wrong because their religion says.. *sigh*
The war in Iraq?: Bullshit.
Bush?: Lying fuck up.
Downloading music?: I download. So shoot me.
The legal drinking age?: 18.
Porn?: ...don't care
Suicide?: I can't keep up with everyone's suicide attempts.... *sigh*

:: 2004 24 April :: 6.46pm
:: Mood: Apathetic

Porcelian Masks
Ay.
Last night was horrid, then wonderful, and eventually looped back to even worse. Mm. As well as this morning. =P I can't figure it out.. maybe I have a dependancy. o.0 or not.

Finished "Ecstasia." Awesome book.
Same thing as lj.. this poem by Francesca Lia Block is really great, though. =D

Wish
If I were a needle
I'd put love into your veins
If I were a needle
I'd take away the pain
If I were a wish
I'd grant myself to you
If I were a dream
I'd make myself come true

If I had a wish
I'd make the dying end
If I had a wish
It would be childhood here again
If I had a wish
Love would be safe and pure

I have a wish
It's for a cure.

=)). It's been raining on and off since last night... awesome.
--
It's awful how I meant those words...

:: 2004 23 April :: 11.17pm
:: Mood: carefree
:: Music: Them Bones-Alice in Chains

Breezy breeze
Lotsa new piccys! Check em out. =)))
Kristen is so gorgy *-* ::dizzy::
I just love this, Kris.

Felt shitty, then went to Arbor with Brandi and Kae. Had fun. =).
Brandi bought a hamster, I changed my mind and bought ice cream at amy's, [amy's is fucking awesome] went to the bookstore, hung in the park. We were a sight to see, people.. LOL.

Ay, did you know that the fake food in pottery barn is REAL?! Omfg.. I tried some and it was really good. I wish I'd gotten more. *-*

No waiting...
I'll be safe soon. *-*

*sigh*
Reading: Ecstasia. Awesome. Francesca Lia Block is definitely amazing.

1 Seduction | Seduce Me ...

:: 2004 23 April :: 8.24am
:: Mood: okay
:: Music: Dirt-Alice in Chains

rise the stars
Bookstore today.
Brandi n I may be getting pets today ^.^ Cuz we're so weird. And we're writing a duck story. XD someday.
I feel safe.
You know, crazy people can be pretty smart, just evil. Lol. @.@
I haven't been on aim for a while.
I've been overly tired for about a week. Can't do anything but lie around, literally... and I actually sleep. my tummy hurts x.x

well anyway =) <333

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