ertailapis's Journal

ertailapis's Journal

:: 2003 31 December :: 1.43 am
:: Mood: indifferent

I need to start working out with my sword again. This cold weather has kept me inside, and it's slowly driving me mad... I can feel it. Took another color quiz, and it's right below this, if you want to see it. Not the worst results I've had, but they certainly aren't the best either.

Somethings have been grating on my nerves lately, though this isn't anything new. Maybe because alot of my other problems and/or conflicts have been resolved, this one was thrown into stark contrast with the rest of my life as of now.

Huh. Didn't mean to get that introspective here. Oh well, until later.

:: 2003 31 December :: 2.42 am

Your Existing Situation
Imaginative and sensitive; seeking an outlet for these qualities--especially in the company of someone equally sensitive. Interest and enthusiasm are readily aroused by the unusual or the adventurous.

Your Stress Sources
Feels that life has far more to offer and that there are still important things to be achieved--that life must be experienced to the fullest. As a result, he pursues his objectives with a fierce intensity that will not let go of things. Becomes deeply involved and runs the risk of being unable to view things with sufficient objectivity, or calmly enough; is therefore in danger of becoming agitated and of exhausting his nervous energy. Cannot leave things alone and feels he can only be at peace when he has finally reached his goal.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Able to achieve satisfaction through sexual activity but is inclined to be emotionally withdrawn, which prevents him from becoming deeply involved.
Circumstances are restrictive and hampering, forcing him to forgo all joys and pleasures for the time being.

Your Desired Objective
Seeks the determination and elasticity of will necessary to establish himself and to make himself independent despite the difficulties of his situation. Wants to overcome opposition and achieve recognition.

Your Actual Problem
Afraid that he may be prevented from achieving the things he wants and therefore demands that others should recognize his right to them.

:: 2003 29 December :: 5.28 pm

+ THE GENERAL INFORMATIONAL JUMBLE +
Full name [last names can be left out]:: Eric
Nicknames:: None
Date of birth:: April 10, 1988
Place of birth:: Metarie, LA
Current location [as in your home]:: In front of the computer.
Other places [general areas] you've lived in:: New Orleans, Algiers, My grandparents house, and this one.
Parent names and ages:: Glen: 43, Kathy: 37
Sibling names and ages:: Ethan: 4
Zodiac sign:: Aries
Chinese animal sign:: Dragon
Birth stone:: Diamond
Birth flower:: Umm
Birth colour:: I don't know, actually.
Birth number [add mon+day+yr until you arrive at a single digit:]: 4
+ KNOWING ONE'S FAVORITES +
Type of food:: I like different stuff. No one favorite.
Specific food dish:: Pizza
Colour:: Green
Weather:: Cold, preferably windy
Country:: Ireland
City:: Chicago
Store:: JC Penny's
Random object:: Book
Television show:: Cowboy Bebop
Movie:: Return of the King
Thing to say:: Anything that's vulgar and/or ambiguous
Moment in history:: Don't really have one.
Holiday or event:: I don't have a favorite holiday.
Memory:: Umm... I don't know. They're all ok.
+ SIMPLE WORD ASSOCIATIONS +
...love...: sex
//...dream...//: truth
...fake...: false
//...monkey...//: stick
...food...: mmm
//...school...//: shit
...California...: ehh
//...New York...//: city
...hair...: long
//...Dell...//: mine
...hug...: run
//...college...//: school
...family...: alright
//...alcohol...//: drink
+ ANSWERING QUESTIONS +
[What is your definition of love?]: I don't really have one I can put into words. It just is, and you know when you're in it.
[Are you fearful of being loved or loving someone? Why or why not?]: No, not really. It's something that comes to everyone, eventually. You just have to be perceptive enough to notice it.
[What is your general outlook on life?]: You're here to learn, so get out and experience stuff.
[What do you think about politics?]: Politicians suck ass, but they are a necessary evil. You just have to choose the lesser of two. (I.E. vote Democrat)
[If you were president, what would you do?]: Destroy the Congress, close our borders to all outside trade and make us self-sufficent.
[What did you want to be when you were 5-years old?]: A scientist.
[How about at 15-years old?]: A writer.
[What about now?]: A writer.
[Why has it, or hasn't it, changed?]: Because I've clearly defined what I want to do and where to go in my life, I think.
[What sort of people annoy you?]: The ones that are only out for themselves, and try to figure out how any given situation could benefit them the most.
[What sort of things do people do that give you hope?]: Support others, try to help, even if it doesn't directly benefit them, things like that.
[What do you think of America right now?]: I think that George Dubya Bush is driving is into the ground.
[How about France?]: They're fine. They stand up for what's right, unlike the stupid ass American citizens.
[How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood?]: 93 cords of pine.

"Getting to know you..." brought to you by BZOINK!

:: 2003 28 December :: 9.49 pm
:: Mood: wealthy
:: Music: "Another Brick in the Wall, Pt. 2" - Pink Floyd

Well, today wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Goldie got to bring her boyfriend to dinner, and I didn't really hear anyone say anything about it. I think they're actually beginning to accept him.

Food was ok, though nothing special. The pie I had for dessert was pretty good, even though it was leftover from earlier.

But enough about the food. Let's get on to everyone's favorite topic: PRESENTS!!

Got a great shirt from my nanny. It says: "My imaginary friend says you have serious problems." I got money from my aunt La-la. (Leilani for those of you that don't know.) And stuff from grandma. Mainly junkfood (Yay!) but I did get that $100 from her on giftmas day, so I s'pose that's why.

All in all, a pretty good day. Now Tuesday will be really fun...

:: 2003 28 December :: 11.27 am
:: Mood: content
:: Music: "Rock the Casbah (Techno Remix)" - Brokedown Palace

Well, I had a decent giftmas. My parents kinda surprised me and got me a guitar like I wanted. They also got me the books I wanted, so all in all, I'm pretty content right now.

Have to go to grandma's house later today, which is a mixed bag, really. I get to see my cousin Garrick that I want to see, but with that comes to annoying aunts that nit-pick and gossip about members of our own family. Can someone explain to me the facination with talking about people behind their backs?

:: 2003 22 December :: 5.42 pm

You represent... loneliness.
Always alone and always sad about it... unlike
angst, you don't have to look for a reason to
be miserable. You want to be in the company of
people but aren't sure how to act when you're
with them. Sometimes you have to make an
effort. You can't always wait for others to
come to you.

What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

Huh. That was unexpected.

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:: 2003 22 December :: 12.34 am
:: Mood: sleepy
:: Music: None

*Yaaaaaaaaaaaawn*

I'm tired, which strikes me as weird, since it's only 11:30 or so. Normally I'm up to around 1:30 or so. Am I coming down with something, or am I just not used to my night owl pattern? The world will never know.

Well, yesterday Goldie, Janel, and me went and saw Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. Three words: Best. Movie. EVER. I loved the scene where Legolas takes down the entire war elephant, crew and all. And the trunk surfing was just pure genius. Kudos, Mr. Jackson.

All in all, this little stint of vacation has started well enough, which is something I'm very happy to say. I want to avoid a repeat of Thanksgiving at all costs.

I've been looking in the mirror for so long.
That I've come to believe my souls on the other side.
Oh the little pieces falling, shatter.
Shards of me,
To sharp to put back together.
To small to matter,
But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces.
If I try to touch her,
And I bleed,
I bleed,
And I breathe,
I breathe no more.

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:: 2003 20 December :: 2.21 am

[x] Part 1 -- The Basics [x]
What's your name? ::: Eric LeBlanc
Birthplace ::: Metarie, LA
Age ::: 15
Age you act ::: 0-59, depending on the moment.
Current location ::: Parked in a chair in front of the computer.
Eye color ::: Green
Hair color ::: Brown
Right, lefty or ambidextrous? ::: Ambidextrous
Zodiac sign? ::: Aries
Height? ::: 5'7"
[x] Part 2 -- Describe... [x]
Your heritage/nationality ::: Western European.
Your hair ::: Does what I want it to.
Your fears ::: Are many.
Your perfect room ::: Has dark colors, like twilight, with a night sky painted on the cieling, along with little twinkling stars, and a skylight over my bed so I can see the real stars from my bed.
What you practically do in a day ::: Go to school, get on the computer, occasionally do homework.
[x] Part 3 -- What is/are... [x]
Words you overuse ::: Damn
Phrases you overuse ::: "Aww shit" "Damn straight" "Fuck off" "Moving right along..."
Your first thought when you wake up ::: "Need... more... sleep..."
Your greatest accomplishment ::: I don't know, really.
Something you want to do ::: Write professionally.
[x] Part 4 -- This or that [x]
Pepsi or Coke ::: Coke
McDonald's or Burger Kings ::: Either
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera ::: Neither
Chocolate or vanilla ::: Either
Adidas or Nike ::: Adidas
Black or white ::: Green
Bills or Coins ((Think $$$)) ::: Bills
Burgers or hot dogs ::: Hot dogs
Egypt or France ::: France
Rock or rap ::: Rock
[x] Part 5 -- Do you...[x]
Smoke ::: Nope
Cuss ::: All the time
Sing well ::: Sorta
Sing in the shower ::: Not usually
Talk to yourself --a lot-- ::: Oh yes...
Believe in yourself ::: Sometimes
Like taking these longass surveys? ::: When the mood strikes me.
Play an instrument ::: To an extent
Want to go to college? ::: Yes
Want to get married? ::: Maybe
Want to have children? ::: Not really
Think you're a health freak? ::: No way in hell.
Get along with your parents ::: For the most part
Get along with your siblings? ::: Occasionally
Think you're popular ::: I hold no illusions about my popularity.
[x] Part 6 -- In the past month have you..[x]
Gone out of state ::: Yes
Drank alchohal ::: Yes
Smoke ::: No
Get high ::: No
Done any drugs ::: Does Tylenol #4 count?
Eaten an entire box of oreos ::: Yes
Been on stage ::: No
Gone skinny dipping ::: *furtively glances around* Who told you about that?
Been dumped ::: No
Dyed your hair ::: Yes
Stolen anything ::: Yes
[x] Part 7 -- Your friends! =D [x]
Craziest ::: Me, I think.
Loudest ::: Janel
Most shy ::: Anhthu (although the display I saw earlier today begs to differ)
Blondest ::: Rachel
Smartest ::: I don't know.
Kindest ::: Vincent
Best personality ::: Michelle
Most talented ::: *chuckles* Define "talented".
Best singer ::: Don't know. Haven't heard anyone yet.
Most ghetto ::: Soreyon
Drama Queen ((or King XP)) ::: Jade
Pain in the ass ::: See above
The one you just want to strangle to death ((Homer Simpson style))::: See above
Funniest ::: We all kind of do it together.
Best person for advice ::: Tamyra
Dependable ::: Most of my friends
Trustworthy ::: Vincent, Moe, Janel
Druggie ::: Kevin
Most likely to end up in jail ::: Tie: Kevin/Jade
Person you've known the longest ::: Moe
[x] Part 8 -- The Last... [x]
Last dream ::: I don't remember the details
Last nightmare ::: Was a few weeks ago
Car ride ::: Coming home from school today
Last time you cried ::: I was playing through Final Fantasy X last month
Last movie seen ::: Pirates of the Caribbean, at grandma's house
Last movie rented ::: I buy, I don't rent.
Last book read ::: The Scarlet Letter
Last word said ::: "Dammit"
Last curse word said ::: "Shit"
Last time you laugh ::: Playing Neverwinter
Last phone call ::: Calling grandma.
Last CD played ::: "Minstrel in the Gallery" - Jethro Tull
Last song you listened to ::: "Cold Wind to Valhalla"
Last annoyance ::: My cat clawing at my back
Last IM ::: My cousin Goldie
Last weird encounter :::
Today, when Cody had a random hug moment and made me drop to the floor.
Last person you hugged ::: I hugged, or hugged me?
Last person you yelled at ::: My little brother, I think.
Last time you wore a skirt ::: ...I'm a guy.
Last time you've been evil ::: Every day of my life at some time or another.
Sarcastic? ::: Umm, three seconds ago.
Last time you fought with your parents ::: A few months ago.
Last time you wished upon a star ::: Umm, last summer.
Played Truth or Dare ::: Again, last summer.
Spent quality time alone ::: This afternoon.
[x] Part 9 -- I swear this is the last one! -- Randomness [x]
Are you talking to someone on AIM ::: Yes.
Do you feel lonely ::: Sometimes.
Ever TP'd someone's house ::: Once.
How about egging someone's house ::: Never.
Do you not like dislike not like me? ::: What?
Ain't Eminem and 50 Cent just fine? ::: Hell no.
Yo Momma ::: Is putting my brother to sleep.
Ever been so hungry you felt like you could eat the person next to you? ::: Uh huh.
What do you think of George Bush? ::: Don't make me go off on a rampage...
Any secret fetishes? ::: Lots.
Do you like to wear chains? O_o ::: Occasionally.
How many languages do you speak? ::: 3
Damn.. are your fingers tired? Cause mine sure are! ::: No, I get lots of practice...
Glad this is over? ((Say yes and I'll stalk you XP)) ::: Yes, and I'll stalk you XP

Bored? ((Over 100 questions)) brought to you by BZOINK!

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:: 2003 14 December :: 6.08 pm

You are a fencer.
You fight honerably, you try not to kill your
oponents, but only disarm them, to force them
to surrender. Once in a duel, you will go all
out, and kill your oponent. You use a rapier.

What type of Swordsman are you?
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:: 2003 12 December :: 11.22 pm

Basic Crap
Name: Eric
Birthday: April 10th, 1988
Nationality: American
Zodiac Sign: Aries; Dragon in the Chinese Zodiac
Who did these things last
Called You: My cousin Garrick
Made you cry: The game FFX
Yelled at you: Umm... I don't remember. I intentionally forget.
Have you ever
Been to California: Nope.
Been to Hawaii: Nope.
Danced Naked: Yes
Took Naked photos: Yes, but I was three
Had A preminition: Yep, and you spelled it wrong. It's "premonition."
stalked someone: No
milked a cow: Uh huh
Which would you prefer
cats or dogs: Cats
Walmart or target: Walmart
god or satan: Neither
good or evil: Good
Last _____
song you heard: "Live What You've Learned" - Linkin Park
song you sung: "Best I Ever Had" - Vertical Horizon
movie you watched: Pirates of the Carribean
oh really ? was it good?: Yes, very.
last noise you heard: My foot tapping the wall
last smell you smelled: Hot chocolate from the kitchen
last thing you ate: A hunk of french bread
Favorites
band: Evanescence
movie: The LotR movies
song: "Imaginary" - Evanescence
color: Green
food: Pizza
fruit: Grapes
candy: Pixie Stix
store: J.C. Penny's
sport: To watch: Football, To play: Tennis
sport team: None
actor: Johnny Depp
actoress: Don't have one
Last few
famous guy or girl you would fuck: Amy Lee from Evanescence
food you would eat for the rest of your life: Hmm... I don't know.
bye: Bye bye!

long survey brought to you by BZOINK!

:: 2003 12 December :: 10.45 pm
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: None

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!! THE WEEEEEEEEEEEEKENNNNNNNNNNND!!

Ok, I really should lay off the sugar, but still, I'm really damn happy that it's the weekend. I couldn't take another day of school if my life depended on it. I'd swear that all the teachers get together and conspire to drop all their projects on the same week, if not day. The only thing that doesn't let me believe that is the fact that most of my teachers do it because they don't talk to each other.

Oh well, enough about school. HOLIDAYS!! Only one more week until "winter break" as I like to call it. ...oh yessss... two weeks of V-A-C-A-TION!! (Yes, I realize that I didn't space the "-tion" out. If you don't know why, it was entirely lost on you.) I NEED this vacation. If I have to go another day more than absolutly necessary with Jade in my class, I swear I'll- nevermind. You heard nothing.

So, that's about it for now. Nothing else I can think of, though I'm sure I missed something along the way. So, be on the look-out for more entries in the coming weeks, as I'll have more opportunities to update.

:: 2003 7 December :: 12.51 am
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: None

Why do I care? Why can't I be some callous bastard, devoid of any and all semblence of feeling and emotion? ...sometimes I hate caring about people. It just tears me up inside. You want what's best for them, but at the same time, you want them to be happy, and unfortunatly, the two hardly ever correspond with each other.

And once again, I ask the question: Why do I care?

...I guess this is why:

How evil are you?

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:: 2003 5 December :: 8.41 pm
:: Mood: strange
:: Music: The sitar part of "Deep River" by Utada Hikaru

Yeah, I think my mood describes everything. Lately, I've been feeling just... weird. Don't know how to describe it; it just is, and the events last night kinda just compound upon things too, so I'm really not sure what to feel at the moment... damn, I really need to make up my mind and get to know what the hell is really going on in my extremly twisted little mind.

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:: 2003 3 December :: 8.22 pm

Current Mood:: Mediochre
Current Clothes:: Jeans and a black t-shirt
Current Taste:: cheese and grease with a hint of pepperoni
Current Smell:: orange
Current Song:: "Hello"
Current Book:: "The Best of the Realms: An Anthology"
Current Crush:: She knows who she is.
Current Worry:: Everything.
Current Website:: www.bolt.com
Current Thought:: "What is my social studies project going to be?"
Current Want:: Peace of mind.
Current Question:: WHY?!
Currently Doing:: No one at the moment.
Currently Talking To:: Moe and Janel

reddies's Untitled brought to you by BZOINK!

:: 2003 30 November :: 1.45 am
:: Mood: pained
:: Music: "Taking Over Me" - Evanescence

*sigh* Oh, how I hate that quiz and its nearly-infalliable results. My head hurts, my heart hurts... hell, even my mind hurts. It's an interesting- if painful - experience. There's just too much going on right now... I feel like I'm overwhelmed. Between friends, reletives, and my own problems, I think I'll end up doing something rash that I'll regret. *sigh*

If anyone has advice, it's welcome. IM me or leave a comment. Do whatever.

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