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My loveletter to nobody..

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:: 2005 28 May :: 5.28 pm
:: Mood: contemplative
:: Music: Within you - David Bowie

"How you turn my world
You precious thing.
You starve and near exhaust me.

Everything I've done,
I've done for you.
I move the stars for no one.

You've run so long.
You've run so far.
Your eyes can be so cruel,
Just as I can be so cruel,
Oh, I do believe in you.
Yes I do.

Live without your sunlight.
Love without your heartbeat.
I... I...
Can't.. live.. within.. you..."

Oh, how I love the Labyrinth.

Today I went out with my sister for awhile. Then I came back home.. and now I'm listening to music, and doodling.
Yeah, very uneventful.
But tomorrow will definitley be the opposite, as I'm going camping with Carl.
I'll probably be bringing my camera along, so I'll most likely have pictures when I return.

I think that is all, I'll update either tomorrow, or when I get back..It depends on what time I decide to wake in the morning.



:: 2005 27 May :: 11.38 am
:: Mood: hungry

To Carl:
I once again forgot that you don't get service out at your mom's.. and I do not have your mom's number. I was wondering if you'd like to do something this weekend. Soo, call me once you read this.


:: 2005 24 May :: 9.17 pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Savage Garden

I didn't really get the chance to update about my weekend, I'll just name a few things..
- Went to Alicia's
- Took photo's downtown Holland
- Had an awesome italian soda
- Walked around for a bit
- Hung around Alicia's house

Yep, I didn't feel like going into detail.. buut, I'm sure you get the gist of it.

I was listening to music with Sye, and man, I'm getting hooked to Savage Garden.. they're pretty awesome. I haven't heard a lot of them, only bits from when my sister would listen to them, and then the radio hits.. but I didn't know I'd like 'em as much as I do.
Thank you Sye, for reintroducing me to them. : )






:: 2005 23 May :: 3.11 pm
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: Zeromancer - Send me an angel

I'm sick of you taking your anger out on me.
I'm sick of you being selfish.
I'm sick of your excuses.
I'm sick. of. you.

"All you care about is your goddamn computer, and your stupid pictures! Fuck you!"

No.
Fuck you.

I've had enough of this.
All you do is think about yourself, you don't care about any other.
I've asked you to take me to the doctor for my headaches. What do you do?
"Oh, it's nothing."
You try to make things better with purchasing me things.
Enlighten me, how is that going to make things better?

Please, look up the word "mother" in the dictionary.
You shouldn't have the honour of being called by that name.


- - - Edit- - - 5:48 pm

I apologise for all of you having to read about how my mom angers me, but she just crossed the line yesterday, and I needed to take it out somewhere. I figured this was the best choice.

I'll update tomorrow.


:: 2005 16 May :: 7.21 pm
:: Mood: cold
:: Music: Darude - Sandstorm

Today was.. alright.
Nothing worthy of posting about, happened during school.
But after school today, Carl and I were talking about how I am incredibly intimidating, you know, when I turn around, throw my gum on the ground, puff my self up, and then slowly turn back around.. you cannot tell me that is not intimidating, you just can't. Hah.
Well, yeah awhile back when there was still snow on the ground, there were kids throwing ice chunks.. and they decided to throw one above my head and it smashed, and fell all over me.. well, I threw my gum on some kid standing next to me, puffed myself up and turned around real slowly.. all of the kids stopped dead in their tracks, and stared at me.. well, then they noticed it was me. This is how Carl put it..
*they all stop*
"Ohh, it's alright, it's just Hillary..we don't have to worry about her."
Then they go back about their business of throwing ice.
They did too, that's the sad part.
But c'mon.. you have to say that's at least a little intimidating.

But on to other things..

I went to my cousin's lacrosse game tonight, I suppose it was alright, besides the fact that I was freezing, and still am. *shivers*
Hm. I don't think I've much else to say right now.


:: 2005 13 May :: 5.50 pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: Old School Hollywood - System of a Down

System's new stuff is awesome, I suggest you all listen to it.
I've just downloaded two new songs.. the one I'm currently listening to, "Old School Hollywood", and also, "Sad Statue", both are incredible.
Counting down the days 'til their album comes out, which would now be 4.


There isn't much to say.. I'm just glad it's the weekend.
I'll be taking some new pictures tonight, ask if you'd like to see them.


:: 2005 13 May :: 2.40 pm

Toby's Birthday!
Happy Birthday Toby!


:: 2005 45 May :: 5.33 pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: Burning - Darude

I was exhausted last night, and still am today.. I think I know what I'm doing tomorrow, as there is a half day.. Sleeping! That sounds wonderful.
Ahh, I love Darude.. well, most techno, actually. Yeah, go ahead, mock me for loving techno.. as I know most of you are "too cool" for it.

Anyway, I had to write a 500 word essay yesterday, on "why I should not leave my homework at home".. Well, the reason was because I didn't think to turn this diagram in on time, and my teacher said it was the only way I could turn it in.. and I cannot afford to not turn it in. *shrugs*

In German class I watched a movie on the Autobahn, I thought that was pretty neat. Oh and Sye, I saw the same model car on it, that you just got! :) I also thought that was pretty cool.

Other than that.. there's nothing.
I'm tired, and off to lie around.


:: 2005 9 May :: 3.34 pm
:: Mood: angry

It seems that people have things to say to me?

Well, everybody, if you've got something to say I would rather you come to me and say it.

I make new friends, just to get talked about later.
I get talked about by people whom I've never spoken to.
Deceitful, contradicting, hypocritical whore?
That's the best one yet.


- - - Edit - - - 8:46 pm

Well, I'm not as angry as I was earlier.
So, while I'm in a decent mood I figured I'd update..
Today has been full of nothing really, well, nothing woohu-worthy I should say. So I suppose I could just ramble on about my day..
- Went to school, finished a homework assignment during lunch.. if I wouldn't have done that I would have gotten killed. Seriously.

- Came home, got online and talked to Sye and Leesh. By the way, I think you all should read Sye's woohu.
Alicia and I are definitley hardcore, with her cargo jeans, and our multiple guns.

- And as for the rest of the night I shall be finishing my homework, and taking a shower.
Oh and, I'm going to actually try and go to bed on time tonight, so I won't be late to first hour for about the 100th time this year.






:: 2005 8 May :: 8.11 pm
:: Mood: exhausted
:: Music: Disarm - Smashing Pumpkins

My weekend was awesome.

On Friday, Alicia's dad picked me up.. and we headed back to her place for a bit, then we went to the fireworks early to talk with people and such. The fireworks were cool, as they always are.. right after they finished it started to rain, so Alicia and I danced in it. Then Jesus walked us home. (and to clarify that, Jesus is one of Alicia's friends.)
On Saturday, we got up pretty late. After finally getting ready for the day, we went out to Meijers.. where we wandered around, and Alicia nearly broke my nose. After Meijers, we went out to chinese. We then went back downtown only to walk back to the park and sit by the fountain, although it was still a good time.. Alicia, I don't even want to post about the damn purple dinosaur. *cringes*
Today, we got up.. then went to Alicia's grandmas for a bit, back to Alicia's then my brother picked me up, for I had to go to a get together, as it's Mothers Day.
Annd that was my weekend.

Sye - I missed you this weekend.. a lot. I owe you a lot of talking-time, I'm planning to be online tomorrow, most of the night. :)
I love you.

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