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fluttering beats in the dark

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:: 2019 28 September :: 11.00 pm

it is such a secret place, the land of tears

are you reaching out

:: 2019 26 September :: 2.29 pm
:: Mood: crushed

we won't let you slip away....
but we did.

good bye friend. I wish you could have stayed longer.

are you reaching out

:: 2019 16 September :: 11.05 pm

I hate those God damned electric scooters being used in pitch black by drunk assholes dressed in shades of grey

I have been worried sick about hitting one and then one plows into me! and scoots off into the distance. ugh.

are you reaching out

:: 2019 6 September :: 8.56 am

Prozac has me like

are you reaching out

:: 2019 3 September :: 7.29 am

we are arriving at the final warm days off summer, soon it will be fall and then it will be winter.

I feel like I'm moving in show motion as time hurdles past me.

I don't know what I want. I don't want anything, but I also want it all. I miss feeling like there was real adventure in my life.

maybe there never was. I want to move to a new city and see what different and exciting things I can find. I want to move to the country and never love in a big city again. I want kinda kids, I want to be a kid myself forever.

I honestly don't care, either things will happen or they won't. why fight against the current when I can just enjoy the ride until the waterfall throws us off to our deaths?

that is, if the river doesn't dry up first... like my optimism about the future.

are you reaching out | Random Journal