I need to find something to do all day! Watching HBO doesn't cut it. So far, I wake up, transfer my body from bed to couch and that's about it. At least whenever I start to driving (lol) things will change, but untill then, I've got to get my ass up and go do stuff O.o But it's so incredibly hot... .__. Heat = sleepy. Blah. At least I won't be slothing around as much when work starts, and I'll have a nice chunk of change to boot. Maybe I should start riding my bike or something? :/
I balance on the wire
Of uncertainty, i'm going nowhere
Standing on top of the
Dreams i've bled
Lift me out this hole
You made me stumble in,
I'm flesh and blood
I don't wanna be here no more.
But people change
I guess i dov let me ask you something about love...
Let me get this baby out my head, you know
I feel him growing
Killing me off now, it lives just for you
I made you out to be some kind of savior then,
A childhood myth
Like black magic girls and santa claus.
People change, I guess I do
But let me ask you something about love
Do you know what you're doing?
No... I just have a feeling
Is it woman's intuition?
No... I think it's just the caffeine
Are you sad cause you'll lose me?
No... I've got lots of friends now
Do you know what you've made me?
No... it's not my problem...
So yeah, this movie... This Arab girl, well, her bastard brother lost her shoe in the river or something, and now she has to wear these crappy sneakers and everyone has nice shoes, and then some other little girl FOUND her shoes, and well....THE DRAMA OF IT ALL (I swear this whole fucking movie is about her damn shoes, and well, you actually feel sorry for her)! DD:
So yeah, L&N is hiring, but, I'm not going to apply. I'm not sure how my hair would go over, and my mom said in small food places that hire a lot of teenagers, well, they don't even get minimum wage (waitresses, she said, get like 2 bucks an hour, which is totally lame. I'm better getting paid 7 dollars and hour at EPM for doing mindless boring shit all day...)
Oh, and I bought a few new shirts today, two of them might shrink to be too small though ;;
The past few days...I've been thinking. I mean, my time is really running out. I was thinking about my career choices and my talent and things like that, and as it stands now, unless I change this, I'm hopeless. So I started to take out my old books which, when I got them when I was 12, seemed like a bunch of pointless shit you didn't have to do to get good, but when I re-read them now, for the first time in years, they make a lot of sense. I have to start studying how other people draw things, so I'm going to start a style study, I guess, copying poses from anime and shows that I like the styles for paying close attention to anatomy, and trying to get a good handle on things, but I REALLY need to work on figure drawing. I'm also thinking I should start researching the field, famous people, and schools and stuff, because I'm starting to realize things aren't just going to fall in my lap and I really need to start getting serious. I need to start writing too. I'd love to be a character designer, or at least the character animators (as opposed to scene and machine etc. artists) I have so many stories and characters stuff in my brain, but they are of no use to me there, they need to be on paper before it can help me with anything.
But, I'm so overwhelmed.
The really big question is, should I go to a cartooning or animation school? I'd love to do both, and they're probably so close that I could jumped around after a while.. or something.. I just don't know :/
My mom went to the doctor's yesterday and now she has to make another appointment to get some tests done and she has to have her blood pressure monitored every week... Apparently she's also going on the no smoking pill. The doctor probably had something to do with that. I hope everything's okay. However, I don't know yet if she's actually going to follow through with quitting... but either way, it doesn't make a big difference to me.
Also, my dad asked if I want to go for breakfast with him sometime. That would be kind of nice.
::
2007 5 February :: 11.56 am
:: Mood: frustrated
:: Music: [The Weakerthans] + [Leash]
have one of those days were you want to try heroine, drunk driving, some form of soft suicide
No updates for a while. Hmmm... I haven't been online as much lately, mostly because I've been sleeping. I hate being so tired all the time. I've almost convinced my mother and I both have some hereditory sleep disorder X_X But also, I go through these periods where the internet bores me. This is one of them.
Babysitting today. 2 kids. double money. Should be fun, and easier.
Redid my hair last night, nice and pink again, but, it only toned the roots. They're a little less noticable but still there.
I'm ordering Blue Heaven tomorrow with my dad, I've decided. Hopefully I can still get the first pressing. I feel bad I didn't get the Grind Candy single. It was the only song on it, and it's on Blue Heaven but there was some DVD extra n.n