nothing to do, nothing to do. contemplating whether or not i should join NHS next year. i want to, but i don't think that there'll be enough time. AP bio, AP psych, hon alg 2, hon english. i think it may be a bit too much for me.. i also signed up for AP us history.. but i want to drop it.. so i have to talk to the counselor. i'm gonna be in KEY club for sure, along with JCC and 4H. i really really want to do nhs.... bleh.

lately, i've been asking people about certain other people. i mean.. i don't like the "certain other people" .. idk. i felt bad for really really disliking them, but there's just so many things about them that make me pissed off. i've talked to other people about them lately, and they all agree with me. so it's not just me, right? i'm not really that cruel? cuz i can't help but dislike them. they just keep doing things that make me even more angry than before. annd it's just like annie said. everyone does it, everyone's fake. you smile to a person you hate because you don't want them to know you dislike them. you try to be friendly and all that anger bottles up inside you even more when you're with them. i know it's not right to try top justify myself, but i just can't help it.. i can't help talking to other people about them, i can't help anything. it's just that they make you so mad, you really really can't help it. you can't help but talk about how they lie, about how they treat other people, about what they say behind your friends' backs. and i mean.. i don't want to sound mean, i don't.. but i need to vent. it's bad, i know.. and i don't want to do this anymore but i can't help it. there are 3 main people i'm mad at, but lately i've been getting annoyed by more and more people. not about how they treat other people, but about how they have no motivation whatsoever, about how they have changed so much and now they're completely different people than the sweet friends i knew before. i can't stand it and i want to keep them as friends, but i can't help but push back away from them.


it's a good thing nobody reads this, though. i just want this to be a venting post, not a smack-talking post.