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Be careful wat you wish for

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:: 2003 12 October :: 10.24 am
:: Mood: cranky

Today was pretty shitty, I woke up feeling like nothing went to work as nothing, and den went to bed as nothing, which makes me come to the conclusion of...
I will never amount to anything, ill always be a N---o---t---h---i---n---g...

These days things have been sooo different...alotta shit has been going on wit friends, not good stuff either...ive been losing alot of my friends lately...alot of my close friends...and its all my fault, ive been screawin everything up lately, and i dont know how da hell or when da hell dat i did it...

I want everything to go bak to normal again! I want my life bak! *Yells fo her mommy, but then realizes her mom dont give a fuck bout her...*


On the other hand, ive been talkin wit Mike again, and dats really kool, cuz i liked him alot, and now i do again...but that will jus turn into another nothing guy dat i really didnt care bout anyway...they all always do...

Last night when Kim was driving me home from work n everything, like we were talkin bout shit n everything and like we were talkin bout alotta shit, and one thign was dat If i ever were having sex n everything that i would have to tell her cuz she said dat its better to tell her so that she could talk wit my mom and like get me something {Like birth contral} so dat i dont wind up preganet at da age of seems like she has high expectations of me too wouldnt u say...den another thing i said to her was dat my friends mean everything to me and dat if i had to choose between my friends and my boyfriend, i would choose my friends ova anything, and she said dat jus wasnt rite...and yah like ya know wat...its so true, ive ditched so many guys fo my friends who said dat they really needed me and needed to talk to me and all dat shit, when they really didnt and in the end it jus really hurt me, like wit Andrew, like i ditched him alotta times fo my friends, who really didnt need me but said they did, and like i lost him, we broke up, and i was da one dat was heartbroken...he maent alot to me and i jus blew it off cuz i used da excuse dat i didnt care cuz it was fo my friends and they meant everything to me...but really i could have killed dat friend fo ruining something that meant a million times more to me than our friendship...


I unno anymore..

Who gives a fuck tho..

Love always,

Make a wish!!

:: 2003 11 October :: 10.17 pm

Nicknames:Jilly, shorty, Jillerz, Gizmo, Stubs, Trix, Jillby, lol alot of em..
Age:Wouldnt u like to knw *wink da wink* haha
Birthday:June 9th
Nationality:Wat do u think smarty?
Current Height:3 feet nothing lol
Hair Color:Brownish Blonde
Eye Color:Brownish greenish
Family:Wat bout them fags...?
Location:P lake! lol {inside joke haha}
College:Is somewhere someone like me will never make it...*sighs*
Piercings:Yah but most of em im gonna take out...
Red or Blue:Blue!
Spring or Fall:Spring
Santa or Rudolph:Rudolph
Math or English:English
What are you going to do after you finish this survey:Prolly do another survey
What was the last food you ate:Uhm a milky way...
High School or College:Neither
Last movie you saw:Uhm...October Sky in math class on fri lol
Last noise you heard:My mom bitchin at me to get offline lol
Last time you went out of state:Uhm i unno dis summer...
Things you like in a girl/guy:Alotta things...
What book are you reading now:Tiger Eyes again
Favorite board game:Monoply
Favorite magazine:Teen People
Worst feeling in the world:Feeling alone...
First thing you think of in the morning:Brittany...
Future daughter's name:Alexis
Future son's name:James
Chocolate or Vanilla:Vanilla
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal:Yah my monkey named Happy
Dream job:Vet...or soemthing lol
Whats under your bed:Alotta junk l ol

Overview Survey brought to you by BZOINK!

Make a wish!!

:: 2003 11 October :: 10.15 pm

Coke or Pepsi?:Pepsi
Love or Lust?:Love
tv or movies?:Movies
cats or dogs?:Cats
meal or dessert?:Dessert of course
east coast or west coast?:West coast i tink...hehe
tall or short?:Short
football or baseball?:Football
soccer or basketball?:Basketball
outside or indoors?:Outside
blonde or brunette?:Blonde
apples or oranges?:Oranges
aol or yahoo?:Aol
stars or moons?:Stars DUH! haha

This or That brought to you by BZOINK!

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