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acidtears

:: 2008 12 May :: 8.41pm
:: Mood: nostalgic
:: Music: Flyleaf - All Around Me

The end.
Today would have been Isaiah's official full-term birthday.
It's hard to think you were in this photo too, little man.



Your belongings atop my wooden chest aren't nearly enough, but they'll have to do because they're all I've got.
Just remnants and resounding echoes of things that once were, could have been, and won't come back.



















The majority of the communication between my little sisters and me lie in MySpace messages.
I haven't seen most of those people in months, years.
And it's funny because not too long ago, they comprised my life in its entirety.
They were my life. Life itself.
Personified in every respect.

And now look.

I hug my Cheo, snuggle into Alex's arms, and take the good with the bad - new with the old.
I hold Emilio's hands secure, but not tight, and smile as his little legs kick out in mock-walking.
I pick out new songs, quotes, and writings to replace the ones I wiped off my chalk wall. Change is good.
But all of the signatures remain from everyone who has ever passed through my door, because change isn't THAT good.
I hug Taylor goodbye in our last multimedia class together, but wave over my shoulder like I always have when we walk out the door and part ways. Too much goodbye would kill me.
I say goodbye to everyone at our last lunch together.
I get my ceremony tickets and stuff them into my bag because I'm just not ready yet.

Hair color, phone numbers, life philosophies, preferred vodka - it's all changed.

So many things could have been.
So many things were, and ended.

I miss every bit of those years, and love every one of you.

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electrofucker

:: 2008 9 May :: 11.23pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: the cutest song i've ever heard

If I was a flower growing wild and free
All I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I was a tree growing tall and green
All I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves

If I was a flower growing wild and free
All I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I was a tree growing tall and green
All I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were a river in the mountains tall,
The rumble of your water would be my call.
If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow
Just as long as you were with me, let the cold winds blow

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were a wink, I'd be a nod
If you were a seed, well I'd be a pod.
If you were the floor, I'd wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I'd be a hug

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

If you were the wood, I'd be the fire.
If you were the love, I'd be the desire.
If you were a castle, I'd be your moat,
And if you were an ocean, I'd learn to float.

All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you, will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

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acidtears

:: 2008 9 May :: 6.41pm
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: Rammstein - Helden.

Delphine es tun.
Courtney and I went down to Alpine today for some gasoline and the new Apocalyptica album.

Thanks to my dad's nifty Sam's Club card, I paid 30 dollars to fill up my tank.
I just want you all to know that.
Because I was excited.

So now here I sit listening to Eicca, Paavo, and Perttu, and I did my make-up all cool with the new stuff I got, and my car is in the driveway with a full tank - and I have nowhere to go.
Because Alex refuses to call me.
And I just don't care.

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