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Living in a world where one's dreams are left to rust ...

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SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 12 June :: 12.06am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: the clock

i had a dramatic day. and today was actually the first night ive been upset in a while... but i was feeling sorry for someone i hate. i think i like someone i have for a time (ask sara (s) i told her when i realized it) but idk what im thinking maybe i dont.. but i may at the same time... im mixed up you know that and im kinda thinking about alot of things like how you make the marshmellows in lucky charms and stuff... and what im gonig to have for breakfast tomorrow.... i need a vacation. tomorrow im going out with nikki and sara and maybe someone else but idk. i hate dancing i mean its annoying... my nose itches i mean like really bad i need to scratch it ok i scratched it anyway well i went to the bridge and it was really awesome except i was quiet... very different bc im loud i just read this to my mom and she thinks im odd. im hungry so i think im goin to make something and ill try not to set the oven mitt on fire again hang on while i make them... ok i put them in the oven and something happened i guess... my house smells so bad grrr jake kept messing up my hair today and sara purposly poared her soda on his shirt and i told him to eat it. bc im stupid and i make up these things. god i am so hungry ok no one loves me so ill shut up bye

5 Watched me as I | Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 10 June :: 10.17pm
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: TBS

WayAwayFromHere6: seems everyone is heartbroken now-a-days
WayAwayFromHere6: besides you


does that make me wierd??

6 Watched me as I | Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 9 June :: 11.21pm
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: IM LISTING TO THE USED YOU LOLLYGAGGERS!! I HATE YOU ALL

im jk in the music
YOUR ALL LOLLYGAGGERS!! MWAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA sorry!! :0) okk i like the lolly part but the gagger part is kinda like your throwing up
i will be using that word in just about every lollygagging sentence i use! okk thanks for understanding

sinceraly, (CANT LOLLYGAGGING SPELL)
your lollygagger friend
Lisa Valerie (the lollygagger)

8 Watched me as I | Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 9 June :: 7.45am
:: Mood: crushed
:: Music: my eyes burn, from these tears, you\'d think you\'d learn over these years

will this pain ever seize? because im on my knees beseeching it to ......
you ripped my heart out and walked away
left me here alone
and as i died laying in this puddle of tears and blood...
i felt more pain from the hurt inside
thinking of you with her ... and this is my only truth
it's all i can say

"take take, everything and leave me scrambling, reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place"

i can't stand this anymore ... i'm hoping wisconsin will bring me back ... because i feel dead

3 Watched me as I | Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 8 June :: 9.44pm
:: Mood: happpppy
:: Music: Taste of ink

i changed my journal layout so its kinda happy bc i been SO HAPPY no reason really i just am! you wont see my layout unless my username is like SnOwFlAkEa4 not snowflakea4 but i covered this already im getting really excited for the weekend and tomorrow!!! yay! okk more later

6 Watched me as I | Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 8 June :: 1.02pm
:: Mood: guilty
:: Music: matchbook romance - my eyes burn

http://www.livejournal.com/users/rip_my_hart_out/

ok so thats my new journal ... thank you so my brittany.

im thinking ... this journal, could kind of be like ... maybe another way to get away from those memories for a little while. im listening to this song and it gets my thinking again ... if any of you have a DL program you should most definately DL it.

My eyes burn from these tears
You think you'd learn over these years
Good things won't last forever

So what the hell am I suppose to do
You only wanted the things I couldn't give to you
And you had it all anyway

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

Tell me i'm wrong when I say
I can't expect you to stay forever with me
I live for that single moment

I take back everything i've said
You would those words on your lips
As if they meant anything anyway

Sometimes I feel I could drop off the face of the earth
It seems I do more harm than good
And I don't know if it's worth me loosing sleep over this

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

Tell me I'm wrong when I say it
I can't expect you to spend forever with me
I live for that single moment

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

my eyes burn - matchbook romance

this journal, is like a bookmark in my life. it might remind me of the happiest time of my life, and the worst time. i'll keep it until i'm strong enough to look back at it. until then, Auf Wiedersehen ...

Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 7 June :: 4.50pm
:: Music: TY

speak and spell
You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.


What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 7 June :: 11.00am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: nothing

i just finished replying to a comment in my last entry. any way last night was bad first i messed up on my shows bc i had no energy and i was tired and made alot of mistakes and to top it off i couldnt sleep ok i fell asleep at like 11 and i woke up to our alarm bc my dad set it off! so i fell back asleep and in 5 mins the company called to check up on us. okk well than i went back to sleep and woke up about 30 mins later bc i was uncomfortable. than slept for 45 mins and woke up screaming from a bad dream than the last time i woke up was 356 and that was bc my dads tv was loud so i lowered it and just gave up on sleeping! im kinda wondering why that happened.. was i stressed overworked guilty idk anyway well im kinda going to cut this short bc i have an orto appt soon

SARA (A) AND MEANA
YOU GUYS I AM SO SORRY... YOU BOTH KNOW I CARE ABOUT YOU AND IM SORRY THAT I HAVE BEEN SORT OF IN A WAY NEGLECTING YOU I JUST TRIED CALLING SARA AND NO ONE WAS HOME SOO ILL TRY LATER WE ALL ARE GOING TO GET TOGETHER.. THE 3 OF US BEFORE SCHOOL!!! OKK!! LOVE YAS


*lisa

4 Watched me as I | Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 6 June :: 12.34pm
:: Mood: creative
:: Music: DISNEY CHANNEL!

YESTERDAY- i had a few shows in the morning and i did so bad bc i was soooooo tired but i saved my energy for the night. we picked up sara (s) and we went out to lunch at sweet tomatoes! than went to the show... sara got her ticket to see me! when i was up i gave it MY ALL!! i think i made like only one mistake according to sara lol sara love yas thanks for watching me!! well i didnt get home until 11:15 than i went to bed i was really tired.
THIS MORNING- i ate srawberry bannana flavored waffles with a spongebob face on it!! yay!! lol okk well i got to get readt for my show! byeee

12 Watched me as I | Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 5 June :: 1.44pm
:: Mood: creative

my pet!

Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 5 June :: 11.50am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: nothing

wow we had our shows tonight and i did so much better.. we all did! the auditorium was packed and there were even like 5 people standing!! everyone said they liked our show the best! yay hopefully tonight we do as good!! well after my shows i went to the bridge and it was so much fun i didnt want to leave but i had to. than we went to mc donalds and craig was working and me and him and my parents had like a 20 mins conversation... that was pretty odd than i went home.. i had alot of fun tonight and my dad got me a present... he got me 2 sunblocks a hose and a cd case lol hes just wierd but i have to go its my first show of the 3rd day its at 1 i have to be there at 1230!! have a fantastic day!

2 Watched me as I | Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 4 June :: 6.25pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: the starting line _ hello huston

important dates
today - the day i forget these feelings

11 - Go to wisconsin

12 - (anna) frank and katies reception :-D

13 - (anna again) frankies graduation

20 - (stephen) the day we decide we wont get on the plane and come back to florida!! muuuuuahahahahahahahaha! --- sorry lol

JULY

12th - ANNA'S BIRTHDAY!!

AUGUST

9th - the day the world ends to mark the beginning of yet another high school year ... :-(

20th - my birthday

21st - move back to wisconsin























































just kidding
... look above!! OMG! its ... its .....................

another pointless entry ... *lauren

Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 4 June :: 2.31pm
:: Mood: cranky
:: Music: silenceeeeeee

ahh i forgot on my list of things i dislike the most important thing that i hate!!!

#119. Richard Stadleman

-if you know him you know what im talking about I HATE HIM!! I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HOW TO HATE UNTIL I MET HIM!!

btw my first thing for dance yesterday was horrible we were all falling off the stage and off the risers we came in late ughh it was so bad... tonight i hope we do better...
7pm at North Ft Myers High

1 Watched me as I | Fell


SnOwFlAkEa4

:: 2004 2 June :: 10.16pm
:: Music: HAPPY SONG! (twinkle twinkle)

IM FREE IM SO HAPPY LIFE IS AWESOME YES!!

4 Watched me as I | Fell


mizprettyinpink

:: 2004 2 June :: 10.11am
:: Mood: sleepy - just woke up
:: Music: Ultimate Fakebook -Tell me what (trying to wake myself up)

another survey
¤ name- Lauren
¤ location- Cape Coral, FL ... grrrrrr
¤ hiqhschool- mariner
¤ current school- same as above
¤ work- Babysitting :-(
¤ family- mom, dad, sister, casper
¤ do you like¤
¤your family- yeah i love them ... its always an interesting day at my house
¤ your school- yeah ... love the people in it
¤ your job- not really but its fun sometimes
¤ your city- god no ... moving to pismo beach when i get the first chance with anna
¤ your pets- yeah i love my dog
¤ church- uhm no, as it was when i was 6 ... it bored the hell out of me ... i'd rather be out soemwhere
¤ smokers- no, some cigarettes bother me with the smell but i have tons of family and friends that smoke so im prone
¤ drinkers- yeah ... i have to, its my family lol
¤ partiers- yeah they're funny
¤are you¤ (oh god i hate this)
¤ hip- no ¤ emo- sure
¤ indie- according to
http://www.couplandesque.net/boredom/subculture.htm
i am ... lol
¤ punk- i guess not
¤ metal- no
¤ trendy- no (how about i answer no to everything?)
¤ a good kid- uhh ... sometimes
¤ a rebel- against my parents? sometimes
¤ talented- god no! well maybe at one or two things but not in the arts
¤ smart- yeah i guess
¤ religious- no
¤favorite¤
¤ Color- orange
¤ Book- koala lou i do love you!! lol anna
¤ Movie- any johnny depp movie, but of those ... benny and joon
¤ Time of the day- 11 pm skies are usually clear by then
¤ Website- i have many
¤ Company- not sure
¤ Store- usually pas sun but i find things else where
¤ Food- cookie dough ice cream!!
¤ Place- wisconsin
¤ Smell- lilacs ... but not as a perfume
¤ Sound- loud music ... but in nature probably the night
¤ Animal- dog i love my dog
¤ Boy name- i dont know (i didnt plan on have any kids)
¤ Girl name- i dont know
¤ Subject- english
¤ Word- groovy
¤ Phrase/quote- the only thing that never changes is things will always change
¤ Number- 6 ... and 2, but 6 mostly
¤ Person's live/deadjournal- live
¤ Childhood memory- chee chars ... the lake and park ... walks downtown and fireworks ¤ Boardgame- hmm ... thats a hard one ... yahtzee and cribage
¤ Band- soco
¤Song- konstantine and hello huston speak to me! "what can i say? we just live to far away" well thats a shame that love cant make you stay
¤ Underwear- chris kringle!
¤ Outfit- anything in jeans
¤either // or // neither¤
¤ Hiphop/rap- neither
¤ Indie/emo- both!
¤ Adam sandler/jim carrie- hmm adam sandler ... but i like jim carrie too
¤ pop/water- pop
¤ Black/hot pink- thats gay ... i have more black than pink though?
¤ Halloween/easter- halloween ... its ten times more fun that easter
¤ Dark/light- light
¤ Night/day- night (ironic?)
¤ Anorexic/chubby- neither
¤ cuddling/making out- i dont know, guess it depends on the guy and the mood
¤ syke/riiight- riiight
¤ bed/floor- bed
¤ too much/too little- of what?
¤ party/kickback- hmmm both
¤currently¤
¤ Outfit- PJs
¤ Drinking- ice with water
¤ Eating- nothing
¤ Music- ultimate fakbook, just going down the playlist
¤ Favorite person- i have a few ... but the one who most understands me (you know who you are)
¤ How many im's going- 1 with anna
¤ Who's with you- no one ... nothing new
¤ Are you in love- not anymore ... im just one of the million hearts he'll someday break (in the song lol)
¤ Are you in like- yeah ... its fading slowly (like in ericas profile "i dont run away from you, i walk away slowly, and it kills me that you dont care enough to stop me")
¤ Are you single- always
¤ Mood- still sleepy
¤ Caught up or way behind- caught up ... seeing as there is nothing to catch up on
¤ Horny- LoL no im tired
¤ Miss anybody- yeah, a lot

Fell

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