mystickittie - Woohu.com http://www.woohu.com/~mystickittie Woohu / Woohu.com http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=612215 It's been a while since my last post. Sorry about that. I've just been in my own little world lately. I also haven't been blogging much probably because life has been decent to me the past couple weeks and I don't have too much to bitch about. What I do have to bitch about, I don't really want to blog or talk about. So what have I been up to? Ha! Wouldn't you like to know :) I got my nose pierced. A ring instead of a stud. I'm still getting used to it, but that kinda sucks because I forget it's there and I bump it. ha. It's healing nicely though. I'm going to get a smaller hoop when I can change it. I cancelled my subscription to World of Warcraft. It's not a big thing, but it kinda is to me. I spent alot of time playing that game, and I met a lot of cool people that became good friends. I played for about a year and a half. But, for a while there I let it take over my life. It became my escape from reality and it consumed me. Yeah, I'm a geek, lol. I went out and bought myself a few Mindless Self Indulgence CD's the other day. They fucking rock. My back hurts. That is one of the many shitty things about being single. Lol. After a few years of it, you get used to getting back massages (if you are with somebody that loves giving them to you). I do miss those. I'm debating going to a little massage place down the road from me. The other cook at work keeps changing the radio in the kitchen to Christmas music. For fucks sake, it's not even Thanksgiving yet! He says it's happy music to him, and I agree. But, it's also depressing to me. The past few years have been stressful. I hate not being able to buy what I want for the people I care about. I usually can only get a few things for my parents and for my boyfriend, but thats all I can really afford. It's especially hard this year because I don't have a significant other to share the holidays with. Talk about lonely. Well, I guess I did have things to bitch about :) http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=612215 Tue, 18 Nov 2008 15:50:47 EST http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611932 I just want to thank Mark and Jessica for getting me out of the house and popping my "rock concert" cherry. And also for helping me to discover my love for Mindless Self Indulgence. I'm listening to their music right now, and I'm wondering why I was not listening to them before. I am seriously buying all their albums the first chance I get! Other than that, life is good. Thursday and Friday were the best 2 days I have had in a very long time. I've made some tough changes in my life the past couple days with more possibly coming up, and the only thing I can really say about it right now is...I can't remember the last time I was this happy about my life. For once I am looking forward to what the future may bring :) I'm closing some doors, and opening up new ones. Work has been good. I had a talk with the owner about some issues, and to my surprise, things got alot better at work. For once I can finally say this with meaning: I am happy. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611932 Tue, 04 Nov 2008 02:48:50 EST http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611745 Why do we fall for the people we know we can't be with? http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611745 Sun, 26 Oct 2008 03:51:21 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611723 I am currently looking for a 3rd cook. With only 2 cooks working, it's very hard to get any days off. It's not a full time job, we are only looking for somebody to work part time. You MUST have short order/line cook experience. The kitchen opens at 4:00pm every day with occasional early Saturday hours depending on if we have a special event going on. The latest you will clock out is 1:30am, and that is if you are closing the kitchen on Friday or Saturday. It's earlier on other days. With the holidays coming up, we have more large groups/events/ company parties/benefits/ and banquets planned. We definately need another cook to help with those. You must be over the age of 18. Apply at Westwood at the Crossing, 5760 W River Rd Ne Belmont, MI 49306. Anytime after 5:00pm is great. Thank you. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611723 Fri, 24 Oct 2008 16:13:24 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611722 I hate never having 2 days off from work in a row. When I get home, I'm tired and don't want to do anything. The night of my day off, I feel more like going out, but I have to work the next day. Grrrr... I've been in a decent mood lately. I want to thank Jessica and cuzzy Mark for that! 5 of us are going to the WGRD Freak Show on Oct. 30th! I'm so excited! Shockingly, it's my first concert ever. Well, I've been to many orchestra and symphony concerts, so this is my first "rock" concert. I'm finally getting out in the world lol. I had quite a conversation with my boss (the owner)the other day. I wish I could blog about the specifics, but I'm afraid the wrong person will read this. All I can say is it put me in a good mood, which is rare working there. But things are definately looking up :) http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611722 Fri, 24 Oct 2008 15:22:50 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611593 I've been sick for a few days now. Thursday was the worst. I was in bed all day on my day off. I didn't do anything or get anything done except fill the transmission fluid in my car. I'm still pretty sick. Runny nose, headache, coughing, sneezing, lightheaded, sleepy, etc. Tomorrow is going to be really long. I got paid today, which means I have errands to run before work. Bank, gas, etc. Then I have to get to work at 11:30am. I work until kitchen close, which will be at 1:30am at the latest. I have to be there early because there is a lot of prep work to do for the 250+ guest wedding. When they all get there, it will be very hectic in the kitchen, espically with the crazy owners. So, I'm looking at a 14 hour hectic day, while being sick. Not fun :( Getting paid every two weeks was really fucking up my routine for a while. For years, I was paid every week. But with the bi-weekly paycheck, I would get it and think I had alot of money, and it went quicker than usual. I've cut out some expenses in my life (like going out to the bar with friends and such), and it's helped. I'm paying my bills, and keeping up with things. I can't wait to pay off my credit card debt I racked up when I was broke and couldn't find a job :) I decided that I'm going to take a little out of my check every time I cash it, and stash it away, out of sight, out of mind. Like having another account for savings, but I won't take anything out of it unless I save enough to pay a large chunk of my debt, or if I need it for an emergency. It will be nice to know I have emergency money :) Other than work stress and being sick, things are going alright. I finally called my sister the other night on my way home from work. We both are not the greatest at keeping in touch with each other. I do wish we were closer, but there are alot of deep issues that keep us apart. I wonder if we will really be like close sisters again. I'm pretty sure that I really upset a friend of mine because of a blog I posted a while ago that had alot to do with him. The words I wrote were harsh for a few reasons. That maybe he would realize he wanted out of his situation, or maybe that he would be mad enough to get over me...and make it easier to do so. I'm not over him yet. Even after this long. What we had was too intense in comparison to other relationships to not think about what it would be like again. But, maybe it's time for me to give up and finally get over him. I am a hopeless romantic that happens to be a Cancer as well. I always hated thinking that I needed a rebound to get over him and move on with life (no, this is not about the person talked about above). But, I think I need it. I tried being the single girl that wasn't looking to be in a relationship, but damn, I'm fucking lonely. I don't feel complete unless I have another half. In the past, I ended up going into new relationships after ending things with him, but those relationships would fail and I would go back to him. This time, I don't have a rebound. The older I get, the pickier I am with dating. I'm getting to the point where I want to run back to him, but it wouldn't go anywhere if I did. He can't get anywhere in life by himself, and I can't help him anymore. He holds me down from getting ahead in life and I don't see it changing. Well, I have to get to bed so I can get up early. Blah http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611593 Sat, 18 Oct 2008 02:46:30 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611423 I enjoyed my day off today. There was nothing I really had to get done or catch up on for once. I chilled out all day long :) I won't have another day off for about a week. With winter quickly approaching, and less seasonal outdoor events at work, I might have more time off away from the horrid drive coming up with the icy season. That place drives me crazy sometimes. Well, I'm off to enjoy the rest of my night. Time to watch ABC.com to catch up on my missed t.v. shows. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611423 Fri, 10 Oct 2008 01:40:28 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611361 I got my new phone today. I was going to get a different one, but it turns out that I could just exchange my old phone for the exact same new phone for just $50. So, I decided to go with the cheaper option. Plus, if this phone fucks up, I can do the $50 thing again. Thats cheaper than buying insurance for it lol. I think I saw somebody at the gas station that I knew today. I was running errands and decided to get a beer in Cedar. As I was standing in line to checkout, I noticed a couple girls in the corner looking at things. I didn't think much of it until they turned around and I recognized them. I went to school with both of them, but the sight of one of the girls made me sick to my stomach. We were friends in high school, and now she is the girl who lives with my first love. They have been together like 3 years now. Of course, I could be mistaken, and it could really have been somebody else. I haven't seen her since high school. But I got that gut feeling that it was. I couldn't wait to get out of the store. It really fucked up my mood for a while tonight. Which brings me to my next thought, my first love. We have talked on and off ever since we broke up years ago. I'm not sure what to think about him anymore. He tells me he still loves me, misses me, wants to be with me, etc. Honestly, it's nice to hear those things because I have always wondered what it would be like to try things again with him. But at the same time, he is in a relationship and lives with her. He says he wants to leave, but he can't because both the names are on the lease and he would end up homeless if he just split. She treats him like shit and spends all his money. They fight all the time. I haven't been talking to him as much lately though. I always think the worst of things, and with him not talking to me as much, I think that he's happy with her or changing his mind about things. He is the kind of person though that uses other things to help him forget his real problems, like music. I think he turned into a religous freak on me as well. He used to talk about "time" and "patience" when we would talk about us related things. Now he talks about searching for and finding absolute truth. When I ask him what it means, all I get is a riddle in response. I looked up what he was talking about online, and found alot of religous stuff on the subject. I don't know what to do about him anymore. I guess I'm losing hope in us. He says he has a happy life, so I guess thats it. Even though he tells me the things I love to hear, he hates change, and I don't see making a change in his life anytime soon. When I ask him something, I get a riddle in response. When he asks me a question, I give him straight answers. I resort to trying to talk to him the way he talks to me, but I fail. He never talks the way I do. Maybe I'm finally realizing that we speak different languages. Ehh, I just have to keep my chin up. If it is meant to happen, then it will. I just don't like being told things like he tells me, when there is nothing he is willing to do about it. One last thing, just so there is no confusion here, I have no problem with other religions. Everybody has their own beliefs. Everybody is different. I will never judge anybody on their religion. I just can't stand the religous freaks or "bible thumpers" that go around pushing their religion on other people. It makes that religion look bad. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611361 Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:17:28 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611346 Saturday was a weird day for me. It started out okay, except for waking up a little later than I wanted. I was going to get up early (which is like 9am or 10am for me, lol) so I could get ready for Red Flannel and get to the bank before they closed. I had a pretty good Red Flannel afternoon. I was going to take pictures, but I forgot my camera. The only weird part was that it was most I had ever walked alone there. After the festival, the day went downhill. I left early because I had to get to work by 5pm. But, the parade ended just before I left Cedar, which meant I was trapped in the stop-and-go traffic with all the other people leaving the festival. I was getting frustrated looking at the clock so i decided to text the other cook I work with to let him know I was going to be late. He didn't respond so I resorted to calling work. It was then that I realized my phone was not working correctly. I texted the other cook again and he responded telling me that he had called in sick. Great, I'm stuck in Cedar, going to be late for work, can't call on my phone, and now I'm the only cook on a Saturday night. I turned on and off my phone and was finally able to get a hold of work. They don't care too much if you're late, so I was okay. I had to stop at home before heading to work. On my way out, my mom informed me that my right side break lights were out. Another thing to add to the crappy day. When I got to work, I found out that the dishwasher had to leave early. So from 9pm - 1:30am I was getting many food orders in the kitchen, cleaning up after myself as much as I could, doing the several loads of dishes coming into the kitchen, running orders out to the bar, doing my closing duties and the dishwasher duties. It was crazy. I was exhausted. That was bullshit. Anyways, today was alright. Had to do inventory. Yuck. I felt out of it today. I was tired, dropping things, forgetting what I was looking for in the middle of looking for it, crabby, slow, scatter brained, etc. And I bumped my head on things 3 times today! For fucks sake... I have to get a new phone soon. I think it got water damaged a few days ago. I can't hear anything when trying to call somebody, and my speaker phone button doesn't work as well. The only way I can talk on it is if it is hooked up to my car speakers, or headphones. I'm getting insurance on it this time, thats for sure. I forgot what else I wanted to write. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611346 Tue, 07 Oct 2008 04:10:22 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611277 I recieved a few worried messages about my last blog. Just to clear things up, I'm okay now. No need to worry. I was drunk and depressed and felt very alone. Mix that with a bad headache and it's not a great outcome. I haven't been drinking as much the past few weeks. I think the reason I was more buzzed than I thought was because my alcohol tolerance dropped a bit. Thats what I get for not drinking every night anymore, lol. Instead, I have become a complete stoner again. It's good to switch it up once in a while. But, it still doesn't numb the pain... Work has been better now that me and the other cook are getting along great again. Pretty much, he didn't realize just how much of a dick he was being to me until we finally sat down and had a real conversation about things. Toys R Us wants me to work for them again as a seasonal employee for the holidays. I'm sure I could make it work with the schedule of my full time job, but damn I would be tired. I would have to work at the store early in the day so I could get to the kitchen at 4pm or 5pm. And work there on my days off. I'm still debating it but I'm not sure I feel up to it. There is a guy that I met about a week ago that has interest in me. He's a drummer for the band that was playing when I had to waitress a couple Saturdays ago. I talked to him for a while between sets. He was really nice, but I turned him down when he asked me to go out sometime. I'm not sure why I said no. Maybe I'm just so used to saying it all the time. I'm pretty sure I'm not ready to start dating again, but at the same time, the only way I can really be ready is to just jump into another relationship. It helps me move on I guess. I was hanging out after work last Tuesday when a guy came up to me and told me that his friend is the drummer and that he seems to have a bit of a crush on me, even mentioning me to his friends and such. Wow, I guess meeting me once has an impact on some people lol. Then a few days later, the drummers friend was at the bar again when I was working, and he gave me a flyer to their next show. I probably won't go because I most likely have to close the kitchen, but also because I'm not going after anybody. I'm not looking for somebody right now. If it happens, then it happens. But I'm not initiating anything. I watch t.v. at night. It's almost always on FOX. Now they just changed their late night program lineup. I gotta get used to the different shows again! Grr..They do this every 6 months anyways. It just fucks me up. My mom has been fighting a cold for a week and I really hope I don't get it too. I'm feeling a little sluggish today. But that could be because I'm tired and from the wake and bake :) Last but not least....My crazy cuz is awesome! http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611277 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 22:03:15 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611276 Saturday night at work was pretty crazy. I came in to find that all 3 servers scheduled for the night called in for different reasons. The owners know I have waitressing experience, and I was all they had, so I was a server that night. No training on the computers or anything. The other cook was getting slammed in the kitchen, so I was serving my tables and helping him out in the kitchen when I could. I ended up making alot of my dinner orders. I told the owner that the only problem I had with being a server is that I would be unhappy if I didnt end up making what I could have made by being clocked in as a cook for the night. But, I ended up making more in tips anyways. And it was fun getting out of the kitchen and serving again. They were so impressed at what I could do, they asked me to work early yesterday (Tuesday) and wait on a party of 15 people. I got to work and punchen in as a cook, did prep and got everything ready for the reservation. Then I clocked in as a waitress when they got there so I could ring in the orders. I helped the other cook get the orders out. After about 2 hours they cashed out, I got my tips, and then punched back in as a cook for the night. I made pretty decent money :) They sure are happy to have me working for them. After the chaotic Saturday night, I went to Crystals and hung out with her until Sunday night. She had to pick up some things from Meijers so I took her. It ended up being a fabulous day. After work last night I had a few drinks at the bar. I drank a bit too much though. I didn't realize how drunk I was until I got into my car to go home. My head was killing me and it ended up putting me in a bad mood. It's a 15 minute drive home. On the drive home, my mood went from bad to worse. I was drunk and depressed. Usually when I drive home at night, I go about 50 mph on Northland Dr. the whole way. I get very paranoid about deer running out in front of me. But when I looked at my speedometer, I was going 70-75 mph...and I didn't care. I even saw a deer running away from the road and I didn't slow down. I was thinking about my life and for some reason, thought about ending it last night. I considered crashing head on with another car, but I didn't want to take other lives as well. So, just crashing into the woods at 70 mph would be better. Yeah, I was in that shitty of a depressed drunken state of mind. I just wanted to cry. I wanted it to be all over. Then I got a text message from a friend that might have actually saved me because I ended up texting the rest of the way home. I was still in a pissed off at the world drunk mood when I was texting this friend, and ended up pissing him off I think. I didn't mean to be so mean. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611276 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 22:02:16 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611275 Originally I only had Thursday and Sunday off this week. The other cook I work with called me and told me that his girlfriend quit her job, and that he really needed more hours to make up for their loss of income. All I could really give him was my Wednesday. I needed a break anyways, and it's rare to have two days off in a row for us. Crystal wanted me to come chill with her after work on Tuesday, and I figured it was better than sitting at home. I ended up staying there until tonight (Thursday). I left to have lunch with a friend and to run errands, but the rest of the time I was just lounging, chillin out, and smoking constantly. I forgot my phone charger, so my phone was dead most of the time. It was definately a relaxing couple of days. Of course, I didn't get anything done that I wanted to. But, I'll get things done eventually. I have to check my car fluids soon, espically the transmission fluid. Leaky ass car, lol. I want to get my room organized and make room to set up my Wii and Xbox in the same place. Make it easier to just turn it on and game it up. I'm cancelling my subscription to World of Warcraft soon. I just want to figure out what I'm doing with my guild and say goodbye to my online friends before leaving the game. Yeah, I'm a geek :) I'm excited about getting paid tomorrow. It sucks that I can't pick it up before work and get it into the bank on Fridays. We don't recieve them until after 5pm. So, I have to get up early on Saturday to get to the bank before it closes. Then before work I'll pay the bill that is due on Sunday. Talk about cutting it close there! Getting a paycheck every 2 weeks is still throwing me off. I just never feel like I can get ahead. Now that I am home from my "disappearing act" (aka: mini vacation with Crystal), I'm back to feeling lonely again. Back to reality I guess. But, I've been better lately by trying to keep my mind off of things, being positive, and patient. It doesn't help that a friend recently gave me an old picture of me and an ex boyriend she found while looking through her albums. The weird thing about it is that even though I have hundreds of pictures, I don't seem to have any pictures of me and him together. I keep looking at that picture. We looked happy. I better get to bed so I can take a shower and get my laundry done before work tomorrow. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611275 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:59:40 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611274 Work is going alright. I'm starting to look forward to the days I cook alone more than working with the other cook. Those days just seem easier, less stressful. I can get the orders out faster without him making comments all the time about our different ways of doing things. Because, of course, his ways of doing things is the only right way to do them. Haha. But all in all, we still get along. I now have my own idea of the difference between a chef and a cook. A cook makes the same things the same way every time. The same recipes, the same dishes. Repetitive. A chef doesn't make things the same way every time, makes new dishes, has to figure out how to do things without a recipe. I have to do that alot at work. In my first month there, I was one of the creative minds in the creation of our first chinese dinner menu item. In the kitchen I work in, I like to compare it to cooking at home. We don't have a steam table, so everything has to be prepared to order. Us two cooks sometimes feel like we are personal chefs to the owners. We are always cooking for them and having to do weird non-menu requests for them. It's definately a different type of kitchen experience I'm still not completely used to. Saturday I was in a fashion show. Yes, you heard right. It wasn't a fancy big thing though. It was at Fashion Bug on Alpine. A few weeks ago I went in there and ended up signing up for it before I left, then before the show I had to pick out an outfit to wear from anything they sold in the store. It was an all ages, all sizes kind of thing. The main reason I wanted to do it was for my mom. We don't have alot of money, and she is always having bad luck finding clothes she can wear. By being in the show, I got a pretty good discount on anything in the store. She got a much needed pair of pants and I bought the shirt I picked out for the show. Out of all the other girls there, I was the rocker chick :) It wasn't something I really pictured myself doing. But, now I can add something to my experiences in life...I was a model for a day. There is more I wanted to write about, but it's getting really late and I have to work tomorrow. Inventory Monday. Yay :( I would have ended up talking about the usual thing on my mind anyway...love stuff. Bored of reading about it, right? lol. Until next time... http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611274 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:58:22 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611273 I had a day off today. my plan for the day was to sit at home in front of my computer, watch t.v, smoke, drink, and be lazy. That is exactly what I did :) The day was really weird though. I woke up around 2pm, and walked out of my bedroom. My mom stopped me in the hallway and said "look outside". I replied with "Is it a new car?" LOL. Anyways, Devin was outside working on the driveway. My mom hired him to do an outside project that was too much for her to do. I guess she went over to his house and picked him up around 11am. She asked me a few days ago about her possibly hiring him for a couple days, but I never gave her an answer. I didn't think she would really do it. I wasn't too happy about it. I told her today that me and Devin aren't talking anymore, that we are no longer a part of each others lives. She said sorry, but she needed the work to be done. I know she felt bad. But it was alright though, I still stayed in my room and did what I had planned for the day. He's coming over again sometime in the next few days to finish the project. Geez. It was just a fucked up day. Why couldn't something good happen for once? And on my only day off for a week too! Hopefully I can chat with my Crazy Cuz soon. It's about time we caught up with each other :) My cramps are kicking my fucking ass. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611273 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:56:11 EDT http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611272 I've been rolling my own cigs for a few years now. It's so much cheaper than buying smokes. I pay about $10 for a tobacco and tubes instead of about $50 for a carton. If you smoke a lot like me, thats definately a money saver. Of course though, you have to roll them all. For the past few weeks I've been having trouble rolling my cigs. A bad streak you could call it. It sucks because I have had to buy most of my smokes lately. It adds up. But finally today...the bad streak ended! I almost bought a new roller. Turns out the tobacco I was buying was on the older side and not rolling so well. So, yay! I can save money on my smokes again! I had a pretty good day off Sunday. Hung out and went out to lunch with my friend Crystal. She's been a best friend of mine since high school. We have lost contact here and there, but when we get together, it's like no time has passed at all. The only problems with hanging out with her is that she is also good friends with Devin, and that I don't really fit in completely with the rest of her friends. It's awesome though that two completely different people (with the same birthday!) can be lifetime friends. I just have to call ahead to make sure that he's not there. He is completely out of my life and I want it to stay that way. I really don't feel like going to work tonight. But, I gotta pay the bills somehow! Some nights are good and some nights are shitty. It seems like there are more shitty than good lately. http://www.woohu.com/readcomment.php?id=611272 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:52:43 EDT