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:: 2006 7 November :: 6.11 pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: Badfish- Sublime

guess who's backk
Desiderata (obviously i didn't write this)

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
And remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
Be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others,
Even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
You may become vain and bitter;
For always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
It is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
For the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
Many persons strive for high ideals;
And everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
For in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
It is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
Gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars;
You have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
Whatever you conceive Him to be,
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
In the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
It is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

scream it!

:: 2006 2 January :: 12.29 am

I can't imagine all the people that you know,
And the places that you go,
When the lights are turned down low.
And I don't understand all the things you've seen,
But I'm slipping in between
You and your big...dreams.
It's always you
In my big dreams.

And you tell me that it's over..
I wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clovers..
And your restless, and I'm naked.
You gotta get out,
You can't stand to see me shaking.
Could you let me go?
I didn't think so.

And you don't wanna be here in the future,
So you say the present's just a pleasent interruption to the past.
And you don't wanna look much closer,
Cause you're afraid to find out all this hope
You had sent into the sky by now had crashed.
And it did
Because of me..

And then you bring me home,
because you're afraid to find out that you're alone, oh.
And I'm sleeping in your living room,
But we don't have much room to live.

I had these dreams, in them I learned to play guitar,
Maybe cross the country,
Become a rock star..
And there was hope in me that I could take you there.
But dammit you're so young,
Well I don't think I care.
And if I hurt you
Then I'm sorry.
It's just this guilt has got the best of me..

Then you bring me home,
Cause we both know what it's like to be alone, oh.
And I'm dreaming in your living room
But we don't have much room to live.

And Konstantine is walking down the stairs
Doesn't she look good,
Standing in her underwear?
And I was thinking,
What I was thinking..
We've been drinking and it doesn't get me anywhere..

My Konstantine came walking down the stairs,
And all that I could do is touch her long, blonde, hair.
And I've been thinking,
It hurts me thinking that these nights
When we were drinking, no they never got us anywhere,

This is because I can spell confusion with a 'k',
It's hard to like it,
It's to dying in another's arms and why I had to try it.
It's to Jimmy Eat World and those nights in my car,
When the first star you see, may not be a star.
I'm not your star..
Isn't that what you said?
What you thought this song meant?

And if this is what it takes,
Just to lie with my mistakes..
And live with what I did to you,
All the hell I put you through..
I always catch the clock,
It's 11:11,
And now you want to talk.
It's not hard to dream,
You'll always be my Konstantine..

They'll never hurt you like I do.
No, they'll never hurt you like I do,
No, no, no no no no no no.

This is to a girl who got into my head
With all the pretty things she did,
Hey, you know,
You keep me up in bed.
This is to a girl who got into my head
With all these fucked up things I did..
Hey, maybe,
You could keep me up in bed,
My Konstantine..
You spin around me like a dream, we played out on this movie screen..
And I said,
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Did you know I missed you?
Oh god I miss you..

And then you bring me home,
And we'll go to sleep, but this time, not alone, no, no.
And you'll kiss me in your living room,
Oh, ya see, I know
That I've been missing in my living room.
Cause it's all you, yea this is what I've missed, what I've missed..
We don't have much room
I said, does anybody need that room?
Cause we all need a little bit of room,
To live..

My Konstantine

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