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:: 2004 29 November :: 11.50 pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: greenday

stupid ass guys
i've spent the past 2 hours or so sitting here looking on a bunch of websites for formal dresses, and i found 2 i particularly like & within a good price range. but before i get one online i want to look more in stores & actually try some on, kbob and i will have to get around to this sometime.. i wanna get it over with as soon as possible [ buying a dress, shoes, making a hair appt. ]

but what really drove me to make an entry was how annoyed i got a little bit ago with friggin guys. zach & justin in particular. they both IMed me tonight & zach really had no reason for IMing me other than stating he was hanging out with his g/f.. that's nice? since he barely talks to me otherwise lets just holler at me when you've got better things to do with your girlfriend.. okay. ass. #2, justin. he unblocked me from a despute we had days ago, and had to talk to me as well. asking if i could do something tomorrow & that he wanted to see me and he likes me. what friggin bullshit. i said no [to him liking me] and he goes k cya later then. he needs to stop toying with emotions. ass.

on a lighter note, i did clean out my car, it's clean, yay! that always feels better. hm, i dunno what else. i really need to get out of the house though, so as sad as it sounds i want to go to school tomorrow.

i need to talk to my parents, well my dad, about what i want for christmas because i still want those headlights. i looked at a comforter too that i kind of like that isn't too much, about $60, it's blue & silk.. so it's pretty damn sexy! ahah. more than anything i wish my dad would buy the wood flooring for our rooms, honestly i'd not ask for anything for christmas if we'd get that damn floor. i hate my room entirely because of the ugly old ass carpet we have right now. i want a new alarm clock too.. haha. so yeaaa.

i think that's all i wanted to say.. until next time! ta ta!

i dare ya.

:: 2004 29 November :: 4.26 pm
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: watching tv

twenty-nine days later..
ahhhh! i'm still alive, but i'm back with a new layout! i was getting tired of that purpleness.

well, today is monday, the first day back to school from thanksgiving break, and i didn't go to school. last night my mom made tapioca pudding and we had some.. but put chocolate syrup in it & we weren't quite sure how old it was.. but had it anyways, well this morning i woke up.. well struggled to wake up anyways, and i got up and was putting my contacts in and i didn't really feel good, like i was going to throw up, well then i went into the kitchen to get a glass of water, got the glass down and then ran to the bathroom with it, haha, and i gagged, but didn't throw up.. my mom told me she didn't feel good during the middle of the night either.. and she thinks it was the chocolate we put in the pudding.. so i dunno, i feel fine now though, just really lazy.. so i might clean out my car in a bit, so i can say i did something today. i really can't afford to miss anymore days of school though.. my grades are really slipping in some classes, so my goal now is to make it without missing any days until christmas break rolls around.. which is wednesday the 22nd.

i guess you could say stuff has happened since i've been unemployed. [last entry] haha. but i'm not going to go into detail about that because i'd write a novel. there was a thing with justin that went on for about 2 weeks, that's over with now. my mom went to las vegas. karlie got a cell phone a few days ago. today is kayla & chases 6th month anniversary. i'm still single, but thats alright. realized alot of stuff about guys & that after some stuff went down, so i've come out a little wiser. it still hasn't snowed & i'm pissed. i don't know why but i want it to. hmm, i dunno what else. dyed my hair dark. so yep, i guess you could say it's been a quite exciting november.

it's already december on wednesday, that's friggin crazy!

well, i'm going to go clean out my car now.. because i'm quite bored, so i'll update later!!


i dare ya.

:: 2004 31 October :: 11.27 am

yayy for halloween.

i'm thirsty.

for halloween i'm going to be a bum. yess.. i found the most old school clothes of my moms in our closet downstairs, hahah, it's awesome. + my rainbow colored fro.

last night after dropping kayla off at c-units. karlie took me to blockbuster so i could rent movies. i got super size me, which i fell asleep watching last night and am going to finish here after i finish this entry, mean girls, and white chicks, the laaaassttt one! woo. so that's my excitement.

my dad is making ham for lunch and it smells so good. and the best part is that it's only 1030!! it's suppose to be 1130, but nooope. that's so awesome x2.

so anyways i'm going to get going.. byeee

1 braved it | i dare ya.

:: 2004 30 October :: 1.37 am

these boots are made for walkin all over youuu.

haha yeah for weekend, boo for working.

austin powers [ don't know which one ] is on VH1 right now, so yes, going to watch whatevers left now then sleeep, because sleep is lovely, in all it's entirety it truely is a beautiful wonderous thing.

ok realllyyy.. ta ta

sha boooo

i dare ya.

:: 2004 28 October :: 10.46 pm
:: Mood: content

It's been awhile.
yes. i'm sitting here with the inspiration of Jack Johnson. i lovvvee him. his music is fabuloso. it's been awhile since i've updated, but kayla isn't any damn better. basically same 'ol shit, just a different pair of panties. :) hehe. well i think i'm more satisified with life now than i was last entry 'round. can't say that i'm prancing with joy but there's not too much to bitch about.

today was a good day.

you know what inspired me one day.. and this is cheesy, so don't laugh to hard, but it was before school one morning and i was walking by myself looking for a familiar face, when a older male teacher, [who i'd never seen before and could pass as my grandpa and who was walking the opposite way i was] looked at me and said, "smile, today is a good day" it was just one of those things were when you're looking around it's just like it's one blur except the middle, yeah. and that day was a good day, so i've kind of gone by that. i dunno, i'm a hippy.

i'm really tired of the same thing everyday. seriously. i'll be in the shower and as i get i'm like like.. ok, another shower down, now i'm just that much closer to the end of the day.

sometimes when i look at my school picture, i see a face i don't recognize and a smile so far from being real. none of my other pictures that i'm in with friends or family on my desk remind of me that, just my school picture, because it's most recent and just me, but so far from not. this is really emotionally degrading because when you go through the same things everyday it's hard to be happy, except with the little things that get you through, like friends and being out of school and music, basically life is alright, it's just myself that bothers me, most days i barely have any self confidence and have to just pull myself through the day, i only feel this way during school though, i don't know why. schools never bothered me before. it's just this year. it really has its ups and downs. i'm really not doing to shabby gradewise though, i have all A's except biology and geometry. so i dunno!

anyway, enough for now, i'm going to start some homework. slaaaackaaaa.


i dare ya.

:: 2004 18 October :: 11.16 pm

i dunno anymore.

1 braved it | i dare ya.

:: 2004 13 October :: 5.12 pm

haven't made an entry in awhile, don't need to.. same 'ol same 'ol. workin and hangin out with ppl. karlie's party was last saturday and her sweet 16 was last thursday. we celebrated that all. had lots of fun.

umm.. today was the first day back of school from our 4 day weekend, woot. Brule played for an hour and we had a guest speaker during study, so the day went by kinda fast. and now it's already thursday tomorrow! yeppp. don't have anything planned to do today except go to church tonight for youth group. then i'll call it a day!

alright well i don't feel good because of satan, so i'm gonna lay and watch some tv and AHH it's coooold outside!!

ta ta

i dare ya.

:: 2004 30 September :: 5.14 pm

what's up doggs! nothing much here. 'tis 4 in ze afternoon. afterr schooooollll. yeeah! i wanna eat too.. & clean a lil & hw & shower & sleep and everything else.

i just wanted to update because today is the last day of september, woohoo. another month gone, FULL MONTH of school.. bllehh..

work was lovely yesterday.
i ended up working until 8, because the one and only guy that works there didn't show. and there was only two other people there, so i had to wait for nance to come in. then she let me get anything i wanted, so i got a chipwich, which i *heart. and also yesterday she told me she gave me a raise, so woohoo for that. yeppp. i didn't ask how much because we get our paychecks tomorrow so we'll see. anything more is better than the same though.

i have a 100.3% in espanish. haha yeah, it's so cool. i hope i keep it that far up there. umm.. i dunno what else is new. i wanna go shopping, but i can't really afford it right now, considering i still need like 180 dollars for headlights. i will not cash my checks anymore, until we close [ @ at work ] for the season. and i HOPE i'll have somewhere near close after that. if i at least get 50 [ 30 was taken out for our sweatshirts we ordered ] for this paycheck then that should be a good start, 'cos then i'll have 70.. which is almost 100 more. ehh. idk.


okay well im gonna go eat now and other things, k byebye

i dare ya.

:: 2004 26 September :: 9.57 pm

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky, 'n I'll
Make a wish, take a chance, make a change
And break away
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But, I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And break away

i'm in love with this song. the lyrics are awesome. i was in a bad mood last entry, but i'm better now. i have some crap to do.. clean my room, laundry & effin' homework, then eat, have tea & watch a movie then sleeeep.

i am soo not looking forward to going back to school, the only thing i'm looking forward to is friday, because that's just that much closer to the weekend. grrr. school is royally evil. blahh. i have to write a 5 paragraph essay for english, that's my only homework, just a rough draft that's due tomorrow, so that's not that hard, but i don't remember what kind of essay it was suppose to be, i hope i wrote notes down somewhere, because i deff. don't remember.. ehh.

hung out with kayla & cody today, then kayla & ryan, then kayla & chase & brent & austin. then now myself. woohoo. exxcccitttingg! yep. okay, going to do my shit before it gets too late and pointless to where i don't care to do it anything anymore and just going to sleep. okee.

ta ta!

i dare ya.

:: 2004 25 September :: 8.43 pm

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky, 'n I'll
Make a wish, take a chance, make a change
And break away
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But, I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And break away

i'm tired of everything. i'm not even happy anymore, and that one's obvious. i don't really know why, but it's just the same thing all over again, day after day, school, homework, work, bs w/ guys.. yeah.

i'm lost so far from here. barely anything fun ever happens anymore. and thats full honesty. of course there are times, but it's just never a bunch of goofing off and just having fun all the time and enjoying myself.

it's like 743 and black outside. i'm sticky from work and it's annoying me.

well that was my loveliness.

i dare ya.

:: 2004 15 September :: 11.12 pm

i forgot to mention this when i was making my last entry. today it's been 2 years since ben and i got together, it really feels like it's been 4, so much has happened since then.
anyway, thought i'd share

i dare ya.

:: 2004 15 September :: 9.52 pm
:: Mood: pretty damn good.

hey there! what is goin on? i dunno why but i'm in a pretty good mood. quite odd, but that's okay. i really don't have any homework so that really kicks ass. i dunno man.

yeah, my dad has a safe.. so i'm going to have him put my mula in there, so that i, no matter what, cannot spend it. yeeah! smart, eh? actually my mom came up with it because she's putting money in there too to save for her Las Vegas trip. yes ma'am.

doot. i dunno, nothing is still new. just the same 'ol. we had yet another fire drill today and it was chilly & drizzly out, it wasn't too bad but the field was soaking and that was nasty. 2nd fire drill in 3 days, keep 'em comin!! haha. umm, what else.

i'm going to go to bed early. because i'm boring. haha, actually i want sleep & i can. usually when i'm actually tired and ready to go to bed i have homework to do.. so yeeah. i dunno, it's weird. it's seeming like sophomore year is lighter on the homework side. like in geometry we only do 20 problems max a day for homework, and you don't even have to have it right, you've just gotta show it's done and she walks around and looks to see if it's done and give you 3 points max, and then we go over it and don't hand it in.. it roxxx.

soo.. yep. i have a really bad chocolate craving and i'm too lazy to go get any at the grocery store.. we've only got chocolate donuts, so i dunno, hopefully that'll do it.

well k, i think i'm gonna go


i dare ya.

:: 2004 12 September :: 3.02 pm

Life's journey is not to arrive @ the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather, to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit...what a ride!"

i dare ya.

:: 2004 12 September :: 6.54 am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: tv

my eyes hurt

hey there.
i suppose i'll update. lol, it's been a few weeks, but definitely nothing eventful has happened. just a bunch of bullshit between some guys because some are being fucking annoying. some wonder WHY i'm single. jesus. i can't handle some guys bulllshiittt.

other than that i really cant think of anything to say. other than i fucking hope i don't have to work on homecoming. because we already had to fill out the schedule for that day and so there isn't much i can do except hope i don't get scheduled for that day. even if i do i could get like lisa to work for me hopefully since she doesn't go to whs & wouldn't wanna go to the homecoming. i don't knowwwwww. god i'm stupid, i've known that its the 24th. or maybe i did mark that i can't work that day.. i don't really remember but i HOPE so. goddd. this stresses me out.

i'm such a bum. it's lovely. see, this is why i haven't updated lately. there is nooothinggg exciting in my life right now, just the same 'ol same 'ol. & kayla and karlie are gone so it's really boring =(

i also have a mullet. haha, well not really but i feel like it, because i have really short layer around my face. so yeeah. i dunno, i'm still trying to get used to my new haircut.

this next weekend my aunt and uncle are going to have a rummage sale at our krizzle. because they live like a mile outta city limits so when they have rummage sales they don't have nearly as many people as they would get here, so we're going to have a lovely rummage sale.

i don't know. i don't have anything to say.. so yes.

until next time
ta ta lovelies.

1 braved it | i dare ya.

:: 2004 30 August :: 1.42 pm

hm, well.. i've been attempting to update for a few days now.. i think i'll actually get around to it now.. wellll.. schools started. ha. it's not extremely horrible. i've found ppl to sit with at lunch, so that's good. & my classes are all alright except for general foods & drawing I. i'll live.

presidents bowl is saturday, which rocks. i love the football games. we're playing lincoln. lovely lovely.

i dunno, this year seems so much more different than last year, as if last year were better.. it's just so different. but it might that i'm just not used to my classes & that shit. dooon't know.

i don't know.. i don't feel like making an entry now. some shit sucks. i dunno exactly what, but yeah. i don't know.

i guess i'm not in the mood for an entry now.

this entry sounds really fakey. i'm annoyed with myself. it sucks. i just want to be in a bad mood and be crabby because its how i feel.

1 braved it | i dare ya. | Random Journal