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Dance 'til ya drop

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poisonedheart

:: 2022 4 September :: 7.00am

I've got my training to become a UPS driver this week, feel like my brain is going to explode trying to memorize all the information they're going to drill me on, but I'm so excited to finally start the career I've wanted since I was a kid.

1 were foolish.. | You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2018 5 June :: 11.22pm

A promise from me
Is just a lie I ain’t told yet.
So I’m ready to die, but I’m not willing to watch
You watch me die here in our bed.

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2017 1 November :: 10.47pm

I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who knows me
I'm mean and bitter
And a failure at everything that I say I believe

I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who loves me
I never write, I never call
I never think about anyone at all

I'm not a good person
No matter what I do
My exhaustion will consume me
And I'm too tired for the truth

I'm not a good person
I'm sure you're not surprised
It must be pouring out my sweat glands
It must be someplace in my eyes

I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway

I don't know why I am this way
I'm not a good person, not even to you
I'm staying home because I can't stand the sound
Of another heartbeat in the room

I'm not a good person
Fuck it, you know it's true
I'm lazy, I'm a coward
I'm asleep all day in my room

I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway

I don't know why I am this way

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2017 16 June :: 11.54pm


When something I hold dear is out to hurt me
I kick that feeble dream and whisper something like a prayer

No more shame, no more fear, no more dread

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2017 9 May :: 8.40am



When I was a kid
My whole reality split
I was living a lie
I was a killing machine
I was a war lord
When I closed my eyes

I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop

When I was a kid
I was a total dick
To inanimate objects
The world beat the hell from me
I took it out on a tree
Great Illustrated Classics

I took it out on a fig tree
Out on the lawn
I took it out in the backyard (backyard!)
And behind Rite Aid
I took it out on the crates
And on the shopping carts

We were on another plane
I was the king of pain
In unspeakable cruelty
I set the mommy on fire
I set the baby on fire
Not even Jesus could stop me

I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop

I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop
Stop, stop

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2017 25 April :: 1.09am

So I looked into your eyes and I saw the reflection
Of a coward you and I both hate very much

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2013 6 October :: 10.25am

I have not posted on here in an exceptionally long time. I think I'm finally really happy with my life though. I enjoy my job, I get to see so many amazing, beautiful places and meet interesting people everyday. In a lot of ways it feels like I'm on vacation all the time, always going places people dream about seeing when they retire or something. Instead those places are where I get to go everyday.

3 were foolish.. | You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2012 15 November :: 9.55pm

No feeling is final.

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2012 23 June :: 5.46pm

Interviewing for my first "real" job on monday, full range of insurance, paid vacation, sick leave, "competitive salary" (the average in this job is $65k a year around here).

I am so excited, but terrified that all of a sudden I'll have to be a real adult.

You wanna play?


poisonedheart

:: 2012 27 February :: 3.10am


Love is real
It is not just in novels or the movies
It is fact
And it is standing here right in front of you
So if you open your eyes
Oh what a sweet discovery
There is hope, and there is joy, and there is acceptance
So now let all of the light that collects on your plants
Keep you warm, make you smile
And I will be there with this pen in my hand
To record all the while
You'll be laughing so loud
That the house would shake with sound
And everything will be as new as the day it was found
Love is real
It is not just in long distance commercials
Or something that you thought you felt back in high school
So I will turn black and white
Become that horoscope you're reading
It predicts something good is on its way
Oh, and then I will send you the world green and blue
In a box through the mail
You can open it up, hold it right in your hand
And be glad that it's there
And be glad that you're there
Now, you can feel all the knots in your stomach start to untie
And suddenly it's not so hard to say you're all right
Love is real
It is not just in poetry and stories
It is truth, and it will follow you
Everywhere you go from now on
So if you'd just cast off your doubt
Then your lips would answer for you
Oh my darling, when you smile, it is like a song
And I can hear it now
And I can hear it now
And I can hear it now
Yes, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
Yeah, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
Yeah, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now

You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2011 12 August :: 5.01pm
:: Mood: hopeful
:: Music: Radical Face

Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay it's not the end.

You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2011 6 August :: 11.29am
:: Mood: accepting

It’s good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.

You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2011 1 August :: 9.23pm
:: Mood: complacent

"I am alone in the world, and yet not alone enough to make each hour holy. I am lowly in this world, and yet not lowly enough for me to be just a thing to you, dark and shrewd. I want my will and I want to go with my will as it moves toward action. And I want, in those silent, somehow faltering times, to be with someone who knows, or else alone. I want to reflect everything about you, and I never want to be too blind or too ancient to keep your profound wavering image with me. I want to unfold. I don't want to be folded anywhere, because there, where I'm folded, I am a lie."

You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2011 19 July :: 10.40pm
:: Mood: awake

If you have to ask, you will never know. If you know, you need only ask.

You wanna play?


shalee

:: 2011 17 July :: 10.22am
:: Mood: melancholy
:: Music: Beck

It is a fearful thing to love what death can touch.

You wanna play?

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