whatever happened to youngs man's heart?


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The Lovely World of Mine

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:: 2006 6 January :: 1.06 pm

Nothing week gone, NICKS HOME AGAIN!!! im soo excited about that one, i hate him being in CHICAGO... i feel soo bad that i didnt spend more time with kane while she was home, but its so hard when you have to work 6 days a week and then the day you have free to do something josh takes the day off of work... what the HELL.... SORRY GIRL. i miss you tons though.

What is NEw
JOSH is mad at me, because i told him its rather annoying when he alerts my phones leaves a message calls my work, and then calls my parents wondering what im doing.
GO back to School on tuesday , not really looking forward to that
BEST BUY SUCKS... its not their fault that they dont sell the cd dash kits for there stereos
I still havent gotten my system hook up but i guess thats not anything important to get done.
I have to work all weekend LONG not fUN...

well i gotta get around for work. so im out for now

around the block

:: 2006 3 January :: 11.47 am

I HATE LOOKING FOR TEXTBOOKS ONLINE.... but they just save soo much damn money that you can not pass it by....

HOPE everyone had a wonderful CHristmas and NEw Years :)

not a whole lot going on in my life at this time... but not spending enough time with kane while shes home... hopefully thursday we can do soemthing i dont have to work at all that day...

around the block

:: 2005 8 December :: 9.42 am

So i guess i was supposed to hang out with kurt last night but i blew him off. so basically ruined are friendship and anything that we may of ever had again, because he told me if i did that again he wasnt going to talk to me anymore and that he was just going to stop trying because it's not worth his time. sooo yes i think i decided that i need to be open and faithful to josh and really work on our relationship. Because honesty there is really nothing wrong between us, i just think at some times i get scared because its the rest of our lives that we are talking about. Kinda scary that is.
Christmas is coming soon, im soooooo excited cause that means KANE IS COMEING HOME!!!! AS WELL AS NIKKI!!!!!! it should be very fun im soo happy i love them to death.....
Anyways i gotta finish my english paper so i dont have to come back to this lovely class but then it kinda sucks because this is my internet time....
Everyone have a wonderful WEEKEND!!!!

around the block

:: 2005 29 November :: 10.41 am

Well thanksgiving went alright i guess you could say we went to josh's and then up to muskegon to see my sister and my family. it was very good to see them and everything. I got to see Kane so that was all exciting i cant wait till she comes home for christmas break. and then Nick came home as well b ut his was a secert until he got almost to town so i was soo happy to see him, especially since things werent going so well between josh and i. so he always helps with things like that. I love him to DEATH.

I went to Katelyn's Bday party on saturday it was sooo good to see all of them. they really didnt think that i was going to come so it was a good surprise for them. I love them soo much and MIIISSSS THEM LIKE EVERYTHING.

i've been wondering how things would be right now if things were like they used to be with kurt and i. yes i still wonder all about that. i guess im not over him and i really wonder if i ever will be. is that bad? i guess he will just always be a part of me, that i just cant get rid of. something special i guess.
well class is about over, kane i hope things are getting soo much better for you.. i will talk to u soon... Love ya...

2 comments | around the block

:: 2005 22 November :: 5.52 pm

so josh threathen to sell my house today because he has decided that i dont care two shits about him and that if i go to muskegon to spend thanksgiving with my sister i minus well be expecting to come home to a empty house with out him and find a for sale sign in the yard.... yeah it was a very interesting afternoon this weekend. i finially told him i feel like i cant do anything by myself and that he is always by my side. and i dont understand any of it. I think he basically just gave up on the whole relationship thing. but who knows anymore. i figured i would just let him blow over and what not. he says hes not staying at the house tonight untill i want him to come back home. but he says i better be at home when he gets out of work. i told him he better call because i will probably be hangin out with courtney since that is what i do on tuesday nights. so i can bet he wont leave tonight.

Kane i know that i need the interenet hopefulllly sooon because it sucks not having it though thats for sure. BUT IM SOO EXCITED THAT UR COMING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

around the block

:: 2005 22 November :: 10.39 am

i know it seems like i havent posted at all but i reallly havent had a whole lot to say, Just keeping busy with school and work, and now that the hoildays are approaching fast trying to figure out where were going and what not. Right now i almost just want to get away for a couple of days go up and see my sister and grandma and everyone up in Muskegon. But for what i know is that were going to josh's mom which i am very unsure of right now....

Lets just say he isnt very happy with me right now, but he's just i guess under the mind set that the only reason im goin to katelyn's bday party is for me to see and hang out with kurtis. he asked me last night when i was going to get over kurt, but i asked him what does that have to do with him calling me. just because he calls me doesnt mean i havent gotten over him. THe only reason according to josh is that i got invited by katelyn to go to the party is because kurt told her to invite me. Thanks josh for making me feel not important to katelyn. So he is very upset because i told him i was going. He even tried telling me that i had to take his truck because my car was goin to be in the shop, and i asked him when he was going to inform me on that one, and he was likie well i wasnt. its goin in to get a car starter put on, so of course i asked him where that money was coming from. becuase i know for a fact i am not buying all of his presents for him family for christmas that is his obligation not mine. i have my own to worry about. I guess im just tired of supporting him, sorry for alll the bitchin i just really have to get it out..

I havent talk to Brandin at alllll... so i misss him again more then ever, i told courtney that maybe i will call him and go visit him to get away from this place for a little bit. because if i dont get away for even a night or a weekend . Something goin to happen and i can fully see it not being a good thing.

Nick isnt coming home for thanksgiving sooooooo SaD im goin to miss him, hes been home for everything important my bday and all the small hoildays its goin to be weird not to have him here.. i love ya

Kane is coming home so that is a wonderful thing. i havent seen her in what feels like forever. see what kind of trouble we can come up with.... US NEVER!!!!! go shoppin or out to eat or even both.
But class is almost over and i have to go find out how i did on my business law test hopefully very w ellllll!!!!!! Wish me LUCK
Happy Thanksgiving to EVERYONE

1 comment | around the block

:: 2005 8 November :: 9.46 am

well i finially have gotten to talk to brandin, he is alive and what not, but of course he came up here about 3 weeks ago for his cousin wedding and didnt even call, damn him. but i had to forgive him because he was with his girlfriend so he was kinda liable in a way but he could of at least called. But hes coming home again but not until feb. thats a long time away though, soo we just have to wait. He said he Promises that he will come see me and we will go out and do something even if he brings his girlfriend with him. he is going to leave her at home... lol sillly him. i miss him though..
Nick is coming home this weekend so im excited i hate him being in chicago, but he's comin home on friday and i guess on saturday he is goin to canada but i hope he has ALOT Of FUN. he asked for me to go with but i have to work soo BOOOOO work..
Kane tell ur sister congratulations on the engagement and what not, her picture looked very well in the paper the other day but what is going on with her and him at the Gull LAKE COUNTRY CLUB??? it seemed kinda odd.. oh wait he is kinda odd ... lol well i hope things are getting less stressful each and every day. i miss you and love ya ..

well i gotta get working on something in class , since im sitting in english class doing my journal and not my paper.. oppps. oh well damn that 10 to 12 page paper.

around the block

:: 2005 2 November :: 12.29 pm

so i managed to live through my 21st birthday this weekend, and of course i do not remember much of it. but then again if i did i probably wouldnt of had any fun. so i did very well. Friday my parents josh and my brother took me out to eat and everything and then we went to Friends to have a drink. Nick called while we were there it was soo good to hear from him and wished me a happy birthday and that he was sorry he wasnt there with us. and then from there we went to weezers where one drink after another shot took place i dont think i have done that many shots in such a long time and then christie took us home which i do not remember at allllllll but we love her, i was very surprised though on saturday that i wasnt hung over or anything i felt almost perfect so i really couldnt ask for anything more,
Josh took me to a mudd run that morning which was alright other than the fact it was in GR but oh well then we came back and had dinner with court and matt. and started drinking all over again. so yes i celebrated my birthday very well.

but i have some accounting that i have to do soo im out for now...

kane whats this about u moving to hawaii???

1 comment | around the block

:: 2005 19 October :: 1.31 pm

so i received this phone call yesterday from kurtis , he wanted to inform me that he got a full time job at one of the factories in town. he seemed very excited and everything so i was happy for him. we talked about a whole 6 minutes i think it was, nothing to thrililng he was just alll excited and telling me about all the health benefits that he is going to receive. but how is someone supposed to respond to that when you havent talked to him in like twoo months, i was just kinda like ummm thats cool, i mean i know he wanted me to be all excited for him... i guess its a big step into moving on and trying to grow up. '
so now josh is back to worring about me going and hangin out with kurt, he believes thats all i do, when its not so again i lost the trust issue and its really starting to bug me. i cant help who calls me. so i guess its going to be a interesting couple of days a nyways. because he doesnt trust me anyways because of a phone call i couldnt help from happening. sometimes i wonder if its really worth all of this??? '
Nick is coming home this weekend i am sooo excited i have missed him sooo much. he has to come and get his new car that his mom and dad got hi m, but im just cant wait till saturday well sunday because i dont have to work..

well back to doin nothing today.. talk to everyone soon.

1 comment | around the block

:: 2005 13 October :: 10.27 am

so another week has passed basicaly and i still have managed to get the internet at my house, but then again i dont want to spend the 60 dollars a month so i have just been using the computers at school to get on line, yes im sitting in class right now supposly working on my english paper, oh well,

well my puppy is doing very well i think she is almost house brokin i really really hope so anyways. i started to paint my computer room yesterday its going to be orange and yellow, you know my favorite colors anyways. but other than that things are going well and everything. Josh and i went and saw maddie yesterday she is getting so big though, she's soo much fun though, i believe on saturday were all going to the apple orchard so that shall be fun .

my birthady is coming up like in 15 days very exciting anyways. and i beleive nick is trying to cme home that weekend soo i am v ery exciting i miss him soo much soooo much. i havent talked to bdin either lately kinda wondering if everything is alright with him.. i missss him too he should be coming home sooon.. and kane how can ya not miss her... she just KANE!!! loves too alll three of u and hopefully u all come home sooooon .. :)

around the block

:: 2005 6 October :: 1.03 pm

so i know its been awhile and last time it was a very short entry, i guess that is what happens when you dont have the internet and you try to get online while you are in class oh well i paid my dues for school.. well we are all settled in are house have been there about 2 weeks and it is home for me. it has taken some time to get used to but its working, im feeling more and more safe every night even when josh and emily are gone. so its been fun anyways.

josh got me a puppy the same week we moved in. she has been very good though, only gone to the bathroom a couple of times in the house, but she is getting better, its soo hard to be mad at her thought. shes getting bigger though every day. im going to miss her being a puppy and being able to pick her up so easiely.

well other than that things have been going well with school and everything i wish i could say the same for work, but i have been stabbed in the back this week so i am really not looking forward to goin to work tonight or this weekend, but courtney and i decided to give it a try i n the new way but in about 2 weeks were goin to have problems and hopefully things go back to how they were or joyce is going to be losing some of her best staff... does she want that??? well i guess we will find out.

been talkin to lauren alot lately :) i miss her but shes coming home soo im soo excited i havent seen here in forever it seems like, so of course were goin to ha ve to do something rather FUN.. alright well i gotta get ready to go to work. so i will talk to everyone later..

around the block

:: 2005 4 October :: 9.41 am

so we finially moved in to are house last week it was pretty much a easy thing, we still have alot of things that need to be put away, but oh well, josh got me a puppy last week so i am having fun playing with her. but now class is starting so i have to leave this wondeful internet that i dont have at home...

Kane have a wonderful week at school, love ya and miss you ...

1 comment | around the block

:: 2005 13 September :: 8.48 pm

SIlver lake was fun at least the amount of time that we spent up there. we actually stayed in the dunes until dark and basicially just watched everyone drive out. it was really nice just be out in the sand in the middle of no where anyways. Ate drank and was out in the sun alot.

since all of my family thoough was in muskegon we mangaged to come back on saturday to spend time with them. it was soo good to see all the little one especially nick because i havent seen him he is one big 9 month old but he was cute...

nicholas was home this weekend but i wasnt able to see him. i was able to talk to him so i guess that will work for now, i miss him sooo much though. but i am PROUD of everything that he is doing i love you and miss you .... keep up the good work and stayin out of trouble...

around the block

:: 2005 31 August :: 10.28 pm

things around my family have been all stressful, my mothers father, therefore my grandpa passed away tuesday morning. My mom left for muskegon that afternoon, i am supposed to work tomorrow night but i asked if i could take it off because i just really want to be with my family especially my mom, i miss her soo much i just hope that she is doing alright. i think that is the hardest part of this, is that she is taking care and helping planning and none of her family such that my dad, me, chris and jo are with her. i just want to be with her at this time. Josh and I are leaving tomorrow right when i get out of school to go up, were goin to stay with my sister for the night, so i get to see my ella bear, she is getting sooo big .....

so silver lake is this weekend we were supposed to leave with everyone at like 7am but we will already have a head start, i am unsure about what time were goin to get up to silver lake if its goin to be friday or early saturday i dont think we have decided yet..

well i hope everyone is enjoying college and teh dorm life if ur in a dorm, kane and kail, i miss you guys tons, but u two have better things now than to worry about us down here in great BC... so i hope ur havin fun and staying out of trouble myuch love

around the block

:: 2005 19 August :: 1.19 pm

a response was basically all i was looking for.

around the block

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