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This is your life, is it everything you wish it would be?

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:: 2004 11 November :: 9.05 pm

Well if I'm not a doofus beyond dufuses. I forgot to put a journal in here for my birthday on monday. I turned 16 w00t! I had dinner at Luna Rosa with Lorelei, Devin, Amber, Fran, mum, Linda and Michael. It was an awesome birthday. I didn't think I would of had fun, but I did. I got good presents. I got an iPOD, detachable shower head (get your mind out of the gutter), pretty picture from Amber of her uberly cute brother, sexy man blanket (Brandon Lee from the crow), a big snoopy doll, some eyeliner, and good stuff. Well now that I have done this I can sleep peacefully.

-Chasmin-

3 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 11 November :: 5.26 pm
:: Mood: Cheerfull now
:: Music: Avenue Q soundtrack....thank you broadway.

The internet is for Porn
Any 6 - no matter how personal, private, or random. I have to answer them honestly.

In turn, you have to post this message in your own journal // OR // you have to answer the questions that are asked to you.

Ask away, even if you don't have a journal.. leave an anonymous note.

-Chasmin-

7 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 11 November :: 3.46 pm
:: Mood: Undecided
:: Music: Boy from Oz still

For once in my life, I want someone who needs me..doo doo
I'm not keeping this lil' journal thing with me, so whenever I get sad, or happy or something like that I can write it down. It does help. I saw Ryan and Betty together today, I have no idea whats going on but it's really starting to bug me. Anyways. What else happened today...stuff stuff and more stuff. I have acting lessons later. I'm gonna go play furcadia and listen to my music as usual.

-Chasmin-

Old and busted


:: 2004 9 November :: 6.45 pm

Oh yay, I tried to tell my mom what happened today at school when I we were getting food at Robertos Taco shop and I burtsed out crying. This isn't getting better.

-Chasmin-

2 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 9 November :: 5.33 pm
:: Mood: Crappy el crappo
:: Music: Boy From Oz soundtrack

I honestly love you...
Ok today was going fine all happiness, untill lunch. A bunch of people I hang out with were standing in front of the AV room as usual I moved away from them some but I was still on the steps. Charlie is sitting there and I was listening and he's like "Yah I've sorta been out of the loop lately. I heard that Digem(Ryan) had a thing for Betty" I heard this and it felt like the wind was knocked out of me, it was hard to breath and my heart was beating fast. Ashely looked at me and saw that I was about to cry and she was like trying to make me feel better. I had to look up to hold back the tears. But they came out no less. I got fed up and I went over to where my next class was and just cried...god...even thinking about it hurts. I can't do this anymore. I have to find a way so it doesn't hurt me

-Chasmin-

2 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 5 November :: 9.02 pm

House on Pooh corner
Christopher Robin and I walked along
Under branches lit up by the moon
Posing our questions to Owl and Eeyore
As our days disappeared all too soon
But I've wandered much further today than I should
And I can't seem to find my way back to the Wood

So help me if you can
I've got to get back
To the House at Pooh Corner by one
You'd be surprised
There's so much to be done
Count all the bees in the hive
Chase all the clouds from the sky
Back to the days of Christopher Robin and Pooh

Winnie the Pooh doesn't know what to do
Got a honey jar stuck on his nose
He came to me asking for help and advice
And from here no one knows where he goes
So I sent him to ask of the Owl if he's there
How to loosen a jar from the nose of a bear

It's hard to explain how a few precious things
Seem to follow throughout all our lives
After all's said and done I was watching my son
Sleeping there with my bear by his side
So I tucked him in, I kissed him and as I was going
I swear that the old bear whispered
"Boy welcome home"

Believe me if you can
I've finally come back
To the House at Pooh Corner by one
What do you know
There's so much to be done
Count all the bees in the hive
Chase all the clouds from the sky
Back to the days of Christopher Robin
Back to the ways of Christopher Robin
Back to the days of Pooh

Good song

-Chasmin-

5 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 5 November :: 6.37 am

Gah you all know me the animal lover so throughout here you will find randomly placed animals...click on the pengin (yes pengin) it's fun.


adopt your own virtual pet!


-Chasmin-

Old and busted


:: 2004 5 November :: 6.30 am
:: Mood: Anti-social
:: Music: Here comes the sun

Hehe cool test
I AM 42% ASSHOLE/BITCH!
42% ASSHOLE/BITCH
I may think I am an asshole or a bitch, but the truth is I am a good person at heart. Yeah sure, I can have a mean streak in me, but most of the people I meet like me.


-Chasmin-

Old and busted


:: 2004 2 November :: 8.53 pm
:: Mood: Tear

Oh yah Bush won...what excitement...what joy...I am so thrilled. Lets see what crap we will go through now.

-Chasmin-

2 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 4 November :: 8.35 pm
:: Mood: ::grumble::
:: Music: Nobody's heart

Ebookman
Ok so Ryan has been hanging out alot with these two girls Janina, and Betty. Janina he's teaching how to skate, and Betty he's known for a long time. I've gotten so jelous over this whole thing, cause of just him spending time with them. I hear from people that they see him with the two all the time. God it hurts. I see them both and I can't even like them even if I wanted to. I can be civil but I don't like them. I would love to have some attention from him, but I shouldn't want that because then it would be harder for me to get over him. I just wanted to scream in lunch when Janina and Betty were talking about Ryan and that damned dog doll. I hate when I get like this but jeeze, it hurts. I feel like they are just replacing me...which is true. It should be this way but the truth hurts. It's good that Ryan's life is better and everything is going good for him. In other words since we broke up everything has been better for him, maybe I was bringing him down. I know I should stop brooding over this but I can't help it. I try really hard, sometimes I can and I feel great then at other times I will just want to sit down and cry. Ryan didn't even remember my birthday anymore. When right before we broke up he was always going your birthdays coming up, the big day is coming up, what do you want? Now he's like when is it again? Oh yah. AHHHHHHHHHHHH! I feel like my charecter in the play that I'm doing. Getting tossed away like a rag doll. I wish he was ready for a girlfriend, I wish he loved me still. But then again you should be careful what you wish for and is what I'm wishing for even something thats good for me? Gah and another thing, now that we split up his computer works! He's making profiles again! God....he stopped doing the profile thing for me so long ago...he stopped coming online. Now he's on all the time. Things are so different now, life is different.

-Chasmin-

1 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 2 November :: 6.28 am
:: Mood: Alive?
:: Music: Billy Idol

Election Day!
Wow today is election day, I wanna know who's gonna win. Just think (I think this is pretty cool) that when our generation gets older this shits gonna be in text books. I dunno I find that an interesting thought. I wonder what it would be like to be the first woman president. I know it would be both a good and bad thing. So many would hate you for being a woman in office, but many would admire you for taking on the job. Well I guess we will have to wait till later to find out who wins. I hope it's Kerry....I do. I don't really care for him but in my opinion it's a better choice then Bush. Ok school time.

-Chasmin-

3 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 1 November :: 10.46 pm

Halloween pic
Read more..

-Chasmin-

2 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 31 October :: 4.36 pm
:: Mood: Crappola
:: Music: Selena

Happy Halloween?
Yah so Happy Halloween everyone. I worked for the first part, all dressed up and all that good stuff. If I get a digi pic I will post it on here. I think I'm going ot Jons party thing tonight, so good stuff. Lucy the other hostess was a cop everyone was hitting on her. I did something stupid on friday and now I regret doing it. I gave Ryan a note telling him how I felt about everything, and I think that was a really bad idea...I just have a bad feeling. I hate this feeling...I hate stuff. Ryan is able to go out and do stuff, make friends and be spontaneous, I'm happy for him. I should do that....enh too much energy. I wonder when or if Lorelei is picking me up. I want to be happy, why is it hard for me to be happy? AHHHHHHHH! I need to stop thinking about this.

-Chasmin-

4 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 17 October :: 7.03 am
:: Mood: ::all groggily:: huh?..
:: Music: Thourougly Modern Millie Soundtrack

Knott's Berry Farm
Ok the past few entries in here have been too much about Ryan, and today seems the best day to change that constant flow of Ryaness. So yesterday in the wee early morning Marlene had her baby! I heard he was adorable, but still doesn't have a name. I'm feelin' something for her probably happiness but I hope things turn out fine which they probably will knowing them. I learned a dance to the begining of Cabaret...I give dancers so much damn credit...it is not that easy at all. Gah I need to practice that dance today after work. I got the part of Louann in my highschool play. Were doing "The Book of Days" it's a murder mystery thing, I haven't read it yet. But my part I'm the wife that gets cheated on and freaks out finally after not saying anything about it for a long time. It's not a big part but I have one good scene. I'm actually doing pretty well in school, I've been in school mode and I think the only thing I have to worry about now is my AP english class I haven't been getting good grades in her class...so lets see how bad I'm doing in there so I can bring it up. I can't wait for the SAT scores to come out. My teacher said it would take up to 6 wks...but thats too long. I want to know how I did. My dress that I ordered should be coming this week hopefully...if not..oh some asses will be capped and some skulls will be bashed. Hehe. Well must get ready for work, tata!

-Chasmin-

1 New hotness | Old and busted


:: 2004 12 October :: 8.39 pm
:: Mood: Wow...
:: Music: Queen

Breakin' up is never easy I know but I have to go...-Mamma Mia
Well, Ryan and I will not be getting back together again...and now I can cry. I'm crying alot. And it hurts. He said he's not ready for a relationship and I respect that, but god damn does this hurt. I've lost him, and it hurts. I wanted to cry and now I got my wish.

-Chasmin-

2 New hotness | Old and busted

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