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.put your ear to my chest and listen to my heart shatter.

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:: 2003 26 August :: 10.55 pm
:: Mood: sore & chalky
:: Music: dashboard confessional- hey girl

im gonna get LOST
well today was orientation........

i got there with my dad and walked around and ran through my sceduale and stuff...then met up with aprille and helped her a little bit....
she looked preatty good for just being in a car accident, only a few scratches...
i saw jaimie like 329876593865 times today haha she was like STOP STALKING ME IM GONNA SHOOT YOU BANG BANG hahaha
and i saw Ren alot too...every time we saw each other we just laughed lol...her hair isnt pink ne more :(
im gonna get sooo lost cuz theres like 398653576 wings ughhh

well then i came home and then went to gymnastics cuz it started tonight...
i am SO sore...and my back hurts wicked bad...
at one point i was laughing at margaret cuz her hands looked funny when she was doing leaps and she was like im gonna punch you in the face...
then i went to go do a cartwheel and i completely forgot what i was doing in the middle of it and just kinda fell over
me and margaret were laughing soooooo hard haha i couldnt even begin to explain how funny i looked
all in all my practice sucked cept i think i did really well on vault, if thats what you can call it...
my back is killing me...i have to ice it soon or something grrr
I got a new leo and warmups today and stuff....
im so tierd right now i could just crash right now...
so i think im going to soon

i cant wait for sam to come home only 3 more days <33

note me
<33 cassie*lou

i love you and miss you much sam...

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 26 August :: 10.00 pm

standard lines
Standard Lines
youre not over you ex, and youve seen them, you
still want to talk to them, but you also still
want them.

what dashboard confessional song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

emo kid
Emo Kid.

Which Subculture Are You?
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::Which one of my odd friends are you?::
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Destined Fairy Tale
The Destined Fairytale...

Whats your story?
brought to you by Quizilla

Yesterday, The Beatles.

Whats Your Suicide Ballad?
brought to you by Quizilla

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 25 August :: 9.41 pm
:: Mood: scared
:: Music: so beautiful- dashboard confessional

omfg im gonna die
lets seeeee.....

last night I watched a two hour charmed thing...then i slept over at kylies house.....
this morning she went to school and got her sceduale changed then we went over to mikes and watched blue was ok

then we watched mike play a snowboarding game and annoyed the shit outta him with our new word....nobordn and niing haah

then i got home and got ready to go out to dinner with the family....
we stopped at tj max to get my uncle a wedding presant and we were looking at the photo frames and i knocked one over and it was like a chain reaction like r5093879837 other ones fell thank god only one broke i was like =-o omg omg omg haha
my mom laughed at me tho....

after i picked them all up we went to Luigis and i met my uncles new wife Ericka....shes really really cool and she wants me to come visit them in Nevada :) shes even gonna pay for the Air Fair and stuff when i want to come down cuz she works for the air lines

me and grandma had a fun time tho hehe....

im stuffed now tho

marissa just told me...that theres only 6 people on the gymnastics team this year...that means i have to do all-around...
and i am deathly afraid of vault...and i suck at floor and bars
oh wow im gonna die :(
beth better be doing it this year...

all for now
<33 cassie*lou

i miss you and love you oodles samuel

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 24 August :: 5.17 pm

i'll be true, i'll be useful...
i'll be cavalier...i'll be yours my dear.
and i'll belong to you...
if you'll just let me through.
this is easy as lovers go,
so don't complicate it by hesitating.
and this is wonderful as loving goes,
this is telling me 'whats the sense in waiting?'

<33 cassie*lou

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 24 August :: 2.53 pm
:: Mood: indescribable
:: Music: Dashboard Confessional- As Lovers GO

The Fair....
ok ok ok so it wasnt all it was cut out to be....

Satin & Her mom picked me up at about 11 and drove me to the fair...the ride there was quite interesting...i heart NY haha satin :)

then at 11:30 we met up with rob and jason..after about an hour or two with many uncomfortable silences rob and jason ditched me and satin...

so me and satin went off on our own and had lots of fun :)....she won a cookie monster at the water game...we tried to win me one but it didnt work :(...i got this really cool coral necklace at one of the indian places for 5$ where in carosel mall it was 15$ so i was happy
we went on some rides and had fun...we saw kylie, mike, cait, jimmy, caity, and angela...
around 4:30 we met up with justine, jason, rob and some people that i dont know...but they were boring so we went and saved my sister from my parents at the log show haha
we three had lots of fun :) and then at 6 satin had to go meet her mom and go home so we took her to the big pipe and she met her mom there....her mom had won her the dragon she wanted to satin gave me the cookie monster :-D and i was a happy camper...
then me and my sister walked around a bit and looked in some of the buildings and saw the dougs fish fry dude =-o and i talked to lauras mom cuz i saw her there...apparently there was a mixup and laura was in trouble uh ohhh

then justine "mugged me" and me and sarah were with rob justine and jason yet again, then sarah was hungry so we went and got dinner :) after that we went on rides and stuff and we had a good time she won an elmo at one of the places...

then on the bus ride home i was talking to a girl who had the same exact used shirt on that i got from laura for my birthday :) so we talked a lil while, her friend had gone to the used at bridge street like meee! :)
me and my sister gave up our seats to an old couple and sat in the back...
i kept falling off and when i thought they were stopped i stood up only to be thrown back and me and the lady next to me was lauging cuz i said "i guess im not supposed to stand up" haha

then me and sarah got home and saw mars again :) haha caity im not retarded ne more
i wrote sam a really long email... and no kylie i didnt break up with him :)

today i woke up wicked early to go to sheds grrr....i slept in the car for about an hour and a half and then in service my buddy jordan the deaf kid was there...
for sunday school i took the kids outside and they were throwing apples at the hilll and will was like this ones gonna be sick haha hes such a cutie...jordan shut the door and it hit him on the head tho :(
a cat came out from the trees that were on the hill and the kids went crazy, their all like KITTYYYYY haha
then i came home and slept and here i am now....

all for now

<33 cassie lou

I love you soo much sam, miss you

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 22 August :: 3.46 pm
:: Mood: i have to pee
:: Music: oldies

tears on my pillow
last night (i had a dream that we went to disney land haha)

well yesterday i woke up and rob and jason called me....that was quite um interesting
then at like 4:30 my aunt and uncle came over from out of town and they are staying until sunday....i also got my haircut lol

hmmm....i had an interesting conversation with matt...haha were very much alike in some ways :-p (oh yea sorry matt but mickeys magix cereal is deffinity better than lucky charms) haha

then i got into another argument with sam....and i ended up sleeping over at kylies house and crying my head off (its what i do best)
we watched empire records and had some very interesting conversations

today i went home and stuff and then went to the movies with my aunt leoda and my sister...we saw was really really really good....despite the fact that my aunt was the only one in the theater cheering haha

idk what im gonna do now....sams in deleware and its only 3:50pm
whooo the fairs tomarrow can't wait guys <33

leave some

<33 cassie*lou

thanks for last night matt....were just like ketchup and mustard haha

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 21 August :: 1.19 pm
:: Mood: thirsty
:: Music: count the stars- taking it all back

Boredum= survey

• first grade teacher's name: Mrs. christopher

•last word(s) you said: something to my dad about his cell phone

•last song you sang: sanctuary when i was playing guitar


•what's in your cd player: umm dashboard confessional (2 cds), jimmy eat world, the starting line, something corporate

•What color socks are you wearing: None.

•what's under your bed: a camcorder and some papers


•where do you want to go: the fair :)

•where are you going to live: maine, manhatten or pennsylvania

•how many kids do you want: 4 at the max.

•what kind of car will you have: a black truck


•current mood: sad, tierd, itchy

•current music: count the stars

•current taste: soda

•current hair: ponytail

•current clothes: black tank top and blue pajama pants

•current smell: I don't smell anything at the moment.

•current longing: a hug from him*

•current desktop picture: finch

•color of toenails: purple

•current crush: Samuel Johns Wright.

•current hate: marissa.


•What does your name mean?: 'helper of mankind'

•How old are you mentally (as in are you mature?): idk.

•Describe yourself in 5 words: ehh idk ask someone else

•What are your worst qualities: ask above

•How long does it take you get ready in the morning: School day . . .about 40 min to an hour


•Do you dream at night?: Sometimes.

•Do you remember your dreams? Sometimes.

•What time do you wake up on weekends?: Between 10-1.

•Do you sleep with one pillow or two?: 3


•do you like school?: somtimes.

•Why/why not?: the people there are cool and its always nice to be with friends but the homework is time consuming.

•What's your fave subject?: english.

•Most hated subject?: math

•Do you have a fave teacher?: Mr. H (4th grade).

•Ever had a crush on a teacher: No.


•Do you have heaps of friends? Nope

•Do you have a best friend?: not really

•Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?: guy friends.

•Do you ever get annoyed at any friend?: Sure .

•Have you ever stolen a friend's boyfriend/girlfriend?: Not that i know of, but i have had them stolen from me.


•Do you like your parents?: sometimes

•Ever run away from home?: No.

•Ever thought about it?: yea

•Do you have any siblings?: sister and a brother.

•Do you feel your parents spoil you?:no.

•Do you not get along with any of your family? my sister.

•Do you have big family get togethers ever?: Nope.


•Stolen?: Yea =/

•Shoplifted?: not that i remember

•Gotten into a fight?: yes.

•Are you more innocent or guilty?: Both

•Have you ever had to look after someone who was a drug addict?: No

•Are you racist?: No, but sam says i am haha

•Are you discriminatory to anyone?: not really

•Do you have an open or closed mind to other people's beliefs and feelings?: both i a good listener tho


•What's your fave style of music?: Emo.

•Do you play an instrument?: the guitar

•Do you sing?: yes.

•What's your fave band?: dashboard confessional deffinitly.

•Name 3 CDs that you've bought in the last month: a mark a mission a brand a scar, and i got ok go and our lady peace for my birthday.

•Are you funny or serious?: both .

•Creative or not?: Yes, I think so.

•Are you outgoing or shy?: Outgoing but kinda shy around people I don't.

•Are you lazy or active?:both.

•Have you ever been hyperactive?: Yes


•Are you happy with the way you look?: Sometimes,.

•What would you change?: A lot.

•Do you wear makeup regularly?: yes


•Your all time most embarrassing moment?: too many too choose from

•Have you ever snorted a drink out your nose?: haha yea it hurts

•Ever giggled like an idiot?: Yes.

•Ever embarrassed yourself and pretended nothing happened?: yes its one of my qualities.

•Ever tripped in front of someone you liked?: yes, and ive fallen outta a chair in front of them too.

•Ever fallen off a bed?: yes

•Ever sleepwalked?: No

•Ever sleeptalked?:yes

5 Artists | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 20 August :: 11.02 pm
:: Mood: guilty
:: Music: Our Lady Peace- Innocent

Will You Still Love Me Tomarrow
well yesterday i cleaned around the house and stuff for a bit then i went to mikes house around 8:30ish...
Sam and Nick were there and we watched old school for like the gazillionth time....

i left with sam at like 11:30ish and we walked home....sam got freaked out cuz he heard coyotes and ducks....he got all scared and was like 'lets walk faster' haha....
well then i slept over at kylies house and we hung around and talked and stuff
in the morning we went to mikes house and then sam came over and we hung out a bit....

me and sam ended up getting in another fight and i ended up crying and some things were said that i hope werent ment....and i was just in a bitchy mood today....

well like a half hour later we all decided to go to my house and sam went home without telling ne one and so we all got pissed...
then me mike and kylie got to my house and my sister was babysitting emma so they all drooled over the baby and then someone pranked mikes cellphone and it was the funniest thing ever

well everyone left at 5 then i stuck around the house and cleaned and stuff cuz i have family from outta town comming tomarrow
then me and caity went to the movies and saw Uptown Girls and we saw marissa after and said scumbag and stuff.....

then we went home and here i am now....

caity, angela, dave, and satin are all making fun of my vegitarianisum and saying BACON...its kinda funny but their just teasing their sooo supportive haha
rob thinks i can do it tho!!!

all for now
<33 cassie*lou

sam* im sorry about today....i still love you =/

Caity: your getting to emo for me cassie! haha caity :-p

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 20 August :: 10.30 am
:: Mood: gloomy

There's so many things you don't know about me
The books that I read, the things that I watch
And it's not too unusual to ask my age
Or what's my favorite drink
And then the midnight shift arrives
Backing up the stars that cry your name
And you always say something gets in the way
That tears you inside

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 19 August :: 2.23 pm
:: Mood: bitchy
:: Music: sweetness- jimmy eat world

sceduale =-o
Day 1

honors english*kirchoff
intro to occ* baker

Day 2

honors global*kowanes

robs in my bio class
bens in my gym class
mals in my intro to occ class

ne one else????

<33 cassie lou

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 19 August :: 12.09 am
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: dashboard confessional- ghost of a good thing

stupid camp
i went to aldersgate....and almost died

i got to go down an 80ft. cliff and stuff too
maybe ill update about it later....

sam didnt write to me cuz he said it wasnt important cuz i was only gone for 5 days....

im going to the fair with rob and a bunch of people on saturday....

all for now
<33 cassie*lou

ill be true ill be useful ill be cavilier ill be yours my dear

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 9 August :: 11.35 pm
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: dashboard confessional- Screaming Infadelities

you kissed me like you ment it
well, today was my party... it was fun..lots of people came and stuff it was cool
i got almost 300$
the our lady peace cd
the ok go cd from sam :)
the alt press magazine featuring dashboard confessional from kylie :)
and everyone else gave me money....cept nicki and aprille, they gave me some little stuff, it was cute tho

my guitar came today too...its wicked cool and BLUE! haha

we ended throwing caity angela laura and aprille in the pool with their clothes on it was crazy! haha

dad finally met sam...he said he was quiet and i laughed

after my party...i scratched of these lottery things i got from jen and jaimie and i got 14$ in them....
then me sam mike and kylie all went to sams house and watched some of super troopers....

before i knew it, it was time to leave :( last time ill see sam in 5 days....ill miss him terribly

tis all for now :) i wanna go read more of my magazine *big smile* chris carrabba is sooo hotttt

<33 cassie*lou

ill miss you sam :(

2 Artists | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 9 August :: 11.36 am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: the starting line- saddest girl story

the things i ment but never said
last night....

i went gorcery shopping with my mom....she was being a bitch but then she took me to mc.donalds haha

then i got home and took a nap then went and hung out with kylie sam mike and nick was there for a little....

then around 11 me and kylie came back and she slept over...she left earlier but came back just to sleep haha

todays my to tierd to care :(

<33 cassie*lou

Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 8 August :: 8.01 pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: Thrice- send me an angel

alone she cries
ok well first of all, i made one of these because TOD is gay and people were doing sick things to my diary :( stupid sick bastards


today i spent most of the day packing for camp and cleaning for my party tomarrow....argh its gonna be interesting...
i think im hanging out with kylie sam and mike tonight but im not sure, kylies sleeping over tonight and were working on stuff for toamrrow....

-i cant go on without you-

<33 ~cassie*lou~

1 Artist | Draw Me A Heart <33

:: 2003 8 August :: 6.48 pm
:: Mood: working
:: Music: dashboard confessional- hands down

gee whillikers
So I'll hit the pavement
It's gotta be better than waiting
And pushing you far away
Cause I'm scared.
So I'll take my chances
And head on my way up there
Cause turning to you is like
falling in love when you're ten

Draw Me A Heart <33 | Random Journal