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:: 2012 8 January :: 3.37 am

For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad
Perhaps I'll die upon this train.

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:: 2012 1 January :: 8.29 am

Hey guys...
I can't tell the difference between dubstep and regular techno. Is this a personal failing on my part?
*edit* 1/2/12
Now I worry that I prefer brostep to dubstep. This is definitely a character flaw I will have to deal with.

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:: 2011 28 December :: 1.14 pm

We're all just doing what we do
Two monks were washing their bowls in the river when they noticed a scorpion that was drowning. One monk immediately scooped it up and set it upon the bank. In the process he was stung. He went back to washing his bowl and again the scorpion fell in. The monk saved the scorpion and was again stung. The other monk asked him, "Friend, why do you continue to save the scorpion when you know its nature is to sting?"

"Because," the monk replied, "to save it is my nature."

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:: 2011 22 December :: 4.50 am

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:: 2011 4 August :: 9.24 pm

Some guy with a tall hat said this
What constitutes the bulwark of our liberty and our independence?

It is not our frowning battlements, our bristling sea coasts. These are not our reliance against tyranny. Our reliance is in the love of liberty which God has planted in our bosoms.

Our defense is in the preservation of the spirit which prizes liberty as the heritage of all men, in all lands, everywhere. Destroy this spirit, and you have planted the seeds of despotism around your own doors.

At what point shall we expect the approach of danger? By what means shall we fortify against it? Shall we expect some trans-Atlantic military giant, to step the ocean, and crush us at a blow?


All the armies of Europe, Asia and Africa combined could not by force, take a drink from the Ohio, or make a track on the Blue Ridge, in a trial of a thousand years.

At what point then is the approach of danger to be expected?

I answer: that if it ever reach us, it must spring from amongst us; it cannot come from abroad. If destruction be our lot, we, ourselves, must be its authors and finishers. As a nation of free men, we must live through all times, or die by suicide.

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:: 2011 3 August :: 1.02 pm

Look, no net.
How to calculate your projected social security payout: Find your average wage over the past ten years. Multiply that by zero. There's your payout.

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:: 2011 28 June :: 11.51 pm

Paint it black or It's just a shot away?

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:: 2011 27 April :: 11.50 pm

Not mine, but inspiring
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesman and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do. He may as well concern himself with his shadow on the wall. Speak what you think now in hard words, and to-morrow speak what tomorrow thinks in hard words again, though it contradict every thing you said today. Ah, so you shall be sure to be misunderstood. Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood.

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:: 2011 26 April :: 4.51 pm
:: Music: Bloodhound Gang - The Bad Touch

I'd appreciate your input
Smooth Criminal with Alien Ant Farm, or Nikki with the Foo Fighters?

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:: 2011 26 April :: 4.10 am
:: Music: Will.I.Am ft. Thugnificent - Dick Riding Obama

To Whom it May Concern:
The $ goes before the number of dollars you are talking about. I know this is slightly counter-intuitive because you say it the opposite way, but trust me, it is how it is supposed to be done.

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:: 2011 9 April :: 5.33 pm

Three things are always certain. Death, taxes, and wu tang clan ain't nothing to fuck with.

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:: 2011 30 March :: 9.59 am

Your homework for the evening
Compare and contrast and the works of shakespeare. Which do you prefer? Why?

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:: 2011 12 March :: 5.57 pm

I went to weezers website to find the definitive lyrics for Hash Pipe. On the bottom of the page with the video embedded it says, "You must be a member of Weezer to comment. Click to join." And I thought, "Well I can't really play any instruments so... better not."

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:: 2011 11 March :: 10.30 am

Restaurant websites piss me off on the regular. I understand that scanning your hours or menu and then putting it up as a pdf is a lot easier, but you are a million dollar company and this is the beginning of the age of smart phones. Hire somebody to fucking type that shit up.

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:: 2011 4 March :: 7.32 am

The Charlie Sheen interview is hilarious. "I was banging 7 gram rocks, cause that's how I roll"
She asks if he has a strategy for taking drugs and he says, "Well I have a couple rules, I don't know if you could call it a strategy."

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:: 2011 1 March :: 12.55 am

Do you pee in the shower? Cause that's gross.
I try never to do it, but sometimes when I'm taking a shit in there some urine sneaks out.

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:: 2011 4 February :: 3.12 pm

So I got some new shoes, they're pretty cool
Got some new glasses too, haven't picked em up yet, but they should make me see better.
I can not NOT recommend Eyemart on Plainfield enough. Everything was really pleasant until after the eye exam we got as shady a salesman as I've ever seen. Aggressive and misleading, I did not like him. Really felt like I was being nickle and dimed for everything.

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:: 2011 27 January :: 11.40 pm

I need a more exciting life.
Things that made my blood pump faster today:
A black ops kill streak
The chance to make an excellent third comment on a fark post.

And I only sneaked that last one into the last twenty minutes of the day.

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:: 2011 26 January :: 9.23 am

If you could pick your last words, what would they be?
Evacuate? In our moment of triumph? I think you overestimate their chances.

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:: 2010 29 December :: 12.24 am

Remember playing Warcraft 2? In the very beginning of an online match you started with one peon, who had to build the farm to make it possible for you to build more peons. Sometimes, when the game speed was set high, it was almost impossible to stop that peon from mining that gold. He'd mine for a second, pop up, zoom from the mine to the town hall then be back underground before I could select him and push the button.
That was some bullshit.

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:: 2010 20 December :: 4.43 am

"Go ahead, call the cops!," I yelled. "I'll rape them too."

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:: 2010 2 November :: 9.01 am

Seriously guys, vote today. You have until 8.
Even if you don't give two shits about politicians there are a couple of proposals that are pretty important. Namely we need a new state constitution pretty bad. The corruption one is pretty important, and I never dreamed it wouldn't pass, but from what I saw on the news, I guess there are a bunch of people in detroit who love criminals? They elected one a few times, but to make that a plan going forward seems kind of silly.

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:: 2010 13 September :: 5.54 pm

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:: 2010 12 September :: 9.17 pm
:: Music: Requim for a Dream - Clint Marsell

Start this playing. Now do anything that takes about 6 and a half minutes.
Wasn't that the most dramatic time you have ever done that thing?

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:: 2010 26 August :: 4.45 am

This pasta is delicious
If i was a girl, i would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so i would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then i would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house, and i would do it until i had so many that the rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses, then i would have a kid and when they're bad i would make them sit in the fetus room.

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:: 2010 8 August :: 4.06 pm

Just being angry at the tubes.
I listen to an acapella group called "The Real Group," they're pretty big in foreigner land, I hear. The youtube comments for their songs are almost all people saying, "we did this better in my choir!." Really? REALLY? You're 30+ member choir sang a song with richer harmony and sound than 5 goddamn people? COLOR ME SURPRISED.

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:: 2010 24 July :: 2.08 am

When our kids grow up, seeing pictures of people smoking in bars is going to be as weird and unacceptable for them as when we see old footage of doctors and newscasters smoking on the job.

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:: 2010 20 May :: 4.23 am

Difficulty? No Tenacious D.
If you could pick one group to have your back in a rock off against the devil, who would you choose?
My vote? Every single guy that ever played for Black Sabbath.

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:: 2010 1 April :: 1.33 am

What if it was you hanging up on that wall?
Luke 22:14-19
When the hour came, Jesus and his apostles reclined at the table. And he said to them, "I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer." And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and then took up his portion of fish, placing it between the bread. And as he was about to consume this repast, a fish still upon the table did begin to move, and spake unto him, saying, "Return to me this fillet of fish. Unto me, give this portion of fish." And Jesus and his disciples were sore amused.

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:: 2010 9 March :: 3.19 am
:: Music: This Is Sparta Remix

So I was watching a youtube video that featured a clip of that soccer player getting headbutted, and I think I really need to revaluate my opinion of the headbutt to the chest as a combat move. That guy crumpled.

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