Do what you want I can't stay this way forever


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I'm not gonna let you break me

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:: 2004 6 July :: 10.19pm
:: Mood: ditzy
:: Music: b0uncin 0ff the wallz !

hey kidzz! its kaela ... heheh i updated ur jernal fer ya britt cuz im s0o f'in bored man. 0kie s0 t0day me, britt, n nick went to Fort myerz beach n ` n0t 0urselfves a nice burn argh it hertz` we went swimin n f0und sum underwater creaturez n attacked each 0ther with them i think i made nick piss his pantz.. den went n g0t ice cream,mickey d'z , n fudge!!! n then we went sh0ppin fer t0yz =p i g0t me 2 n0ise makerz n britt g0t nick stickerz n n0ize makerz as well ..... n then we b0ught friendship bracletz !!!!! markus is at his dads right n0w s0 im meeting him at the mall t0mm0r0w! =] yay so0 there ... i did the fillin` in fer ya babe! mad <3 t0 BRITTANY MARIE GAMESTER N' MARKUS MIcHEAL GREEN.... 0UR B0IIT0YZ mwahhh <3 x`kaela`o

britt luvz her chiken finger nick n i luv muh metal head markus

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:: 2004 6 July :: 8.49pm

Email me ur journal account name!

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:: 2004 6 July :: 8.41pm

plez dont say that i NEED you... i wouldnt be a piece of rotten DOG SHIT wit out you!
i was being a bitch!~~~ i shouldnt of said that! Aplease forgive me~~~ im gunna call you now~ i love you please forgive me~~~ i met a guy but then a BITCH named Crackie took him away! ooh well i like to do things wit sean and i sadly love eric~~~~~ Still

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:: 2004 4 July :: 6.08pm

happy 4th 0f July !!

0ff t0 red white n BOOM!!
w/ nick and kaela and maybe markus?

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:: 2004 3 July :: 10.59pm
:: Mood: rushed

Is love really never having to say your sorry?
Well lets see, lots going on, but not enough tie to write about it all..tehe. Lets jus say wed was INTERESTIN lol. Gosh im soo nervous i miss becky! And i hope shes okay!
Tommarow were going to Kentucky What the hell is that? But oh well i guess its better than sittin here doing nothin bcuz im grounded And James is comin bak while im gone. =( I miss him! Yeah we talked, and im hopin things are gonna get better. We'll see i guess. So yeah newho we'll be bak..? Uhm wed or thurs or so? Not sure yet. I'll miss you all. Malissa ex!! ex since she hates meh and since i aint talked to her in forever! HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULY 4TH BABII

Well tahts it i suppose, for now, britt wanted meh to update *omg i luhv you soo fuckin mcuh babii gurrrl!! And ima miss you!* But yeah luhv you all hope u have a great July 4th =) *mwuz* latah. <3.

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:: 2004 3 July :: 8.55pm
:: Mood: annoyed

why do people care so much about what i do!?!
i wish yall would stop!~ i dont deserve yall and i wont be able to admit it if you keep tellin me waht to do and not to do. i know ur tryn to be nidce but dont let me make my mastakes!~ why do you think im doin it because Jen thinks its FUN?~maybe i want to! i know i should not go but im me.
sry if your dissapointed Chels. i hope your not but just to let u know i want to go ... i want to do that stuff... i dont give a FLYIN FUCK about "C" 's any more ill take them as they come.

Dont freak out~~~ if you need to call me today~until monday~1-313-218-5778~ its my dads celly~ ill be with him~~~~~~~~~~~im not goin wit Jen.............................................................OK!


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:: 2004 3 July :: 11.12am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: all the small things - blink 182

lullaby's fill your room, and i will be singing, singing only to you
wow.. i dont even know where to begin.
I <3 nick =D
and kaela!
and sarah and jamie and markus and kayla and felicia and jeremy.

monday..movies..daniel. kaela. notebook. again. loved it. again.
tuesday..tanned.watched a movie with my mommy. i love her. my hair done. went shopping. went to the movies. nick. mark. daniela. spider man 2. harry potter 3.
thursday..nicks. <3.
friday..kaelas house.sarah and jamie. kayla and mia came over for 2 minutes. nick's mom'z birthday =D.. movies without him ='[. spider man 2. again. fell asleep on kaelas lap. fit 9 people into kaelas lil car. me, kaela, chris angell, chris agnello , markus , sarah, jamie, darren and kaelas mom. came home and talked to nick <3
today i was soposed to go to kaelas grandparents who live by miami with her but her dad sed n0 =[
so maybe ill see nick =D
I MISS JAY!!!!!!!!!

24 I'm almost there | HOLD ON


:: 2004 29 June :: 11.14am
:: Mood: embarrassed

I wanna be loved by you..
Okay heres mah rant for the week. Okay meh and James are going back out, as you all know. But we've always had *friendship* and we've never really been able to get a relationship going. I mean everyone knows that we love eachother and everyone *Thinks* that we'll get married sumday, but we can never keep a relationship, mayb its becuz im afraid of *saving myself for jus one guy* maybe its becuz im afraid of commiting to one guy, i dont know maybe its jus im scared of what im feeling [seeings how its usually mah fault we always break up cuhz i break up wif him] but everytime we go back out its jus like a friendship still. And ya know what, thats NOT WAHT I WANT!! I want a boyfriend that isnt afraid to reach over n kiss meh when we are lyin downstairs all alone. Or even if were together at the movies i want a boyfriend that will at the very least hold mah hand. I want a boyfriend that i can kiss whenever i feel like it and not have to worry *..what if ur mom finds out* what the hell do you really think i care if mah mother finds out that i made out wif mah boyfriend that she adores mroe than anyone in the whole world?!

And another thing, James wont even like kiss meh well he'll kiss meh but wont make out wif meh, and every other guy ive been involved wif lately, jus wants to finger meh or *lick meh we'll say lol* or something like that, and ya nkow wat i want..i want one guy to jus kiss meh, and kiss mah neck, and jus lets have sum fuckin foreplay before we jump straight in. And hey im not complaining..but i jus want sumone to look at meh as sum1 they love and not sum1 they can use when thier horny..ya know?

Okay..there im done. I jus kind of needed to write that somewhere..dont mind meh neways bye.

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:: 2004 27 June :: 1.32pm
:: Mood: flirty
:: Music: 99x

i c0uldnt love y0u m0re *
i miss jay..
went 2 nicks house =] we watched rest of our m0vie n then markus picked us up & we went 2 the m0viez.. havnt been t0 the m0vies in f0rever saw s0 many pe0ple .. watched the terminal <-- reallllly long movie.. th0ught it was never g0nna freakin end .. when it finally did we went 0utside & then kaelas m0m picked kaela,me,sarah, n chris up.. n she asked if we wanted t0 stay 4 an0ther h0ur n i really did cuz i wanted 2 stay w/ nick s0 i convinsed every1 else t0 stay .. n nick g0t really sick =[ but then he drank s0me water n felt a lil bit better n me & nick walked 2 the gas stati0n cuz every1 was thirsty as hell ..`lets buy bagged ice! what can u d0 with bagged ice? what cant y0u d0 with bagged ice?? lol
<3* n then we finally went h0me - g0t h0me r0und 1`am .. kaela spent the night..

Me & kaela woke up n went 2 nicks r0und 2.. hung 0ut with my babi sister kayla .. watched h0me m0vies 0f muh babii when he was a babii =] he was s0o0o0o0o0o0o cute nd he never w0re cl0thz.. lol.. he haznt really changed lol .. nd then me nd kayla n kaela ate p0psiclez.. played the drumz.. & tryed 2 skateb0ard .. n then we went t0 the m0vies .. saw the n0teb0ok <-- really sad but happy at the same time .. then saw d0dgeball again <-- it was better the second time .. lol .. markus n nick were g0ing krazii laughin.. n me n kae were jus lyk mmhmm... n then kaelas m0m picked us up n we all relised we hadnt ate anything all day.. s0 s he dr0pped them 0ff n we came h0me n ate pizza ice cream & pb&j .. lol .. nd we watched p0rn lyk always .. =D and went 2 sleep...

I <33 nick 2 much *

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:: 2004 24 June :: 7.05pm
:: Mood: excited
:: Music: `* shweetest thang *

The funny thing is, you think your the lucky one
`Hey beautifulz =]
im sittin here watchin the shweetest thing with K*a*E*l*A & S-A-R-A-H <-- l0ve y0uz.. hMmMmz..
i went to nicks at lyk 5:30 .. n we watched this really cute movie.. TOP SECRET CLEARENCE BADGE!! l .. nd we just hung out at his house till like 10:30 n then they drove me home.. =] i love him lotz...

wednesday -me n jillys 2 years !
i went to james's house n we went to the movies n saw dodgeball n thats b0ut it.. came h0me n kaela n sarah came 0ver & spent the night...

sarah n kaela were g0nna g0 t0 sunsplash n i was g0nna g0 t0 nicks but sunsplash was full and nicks m0m sed n0 s0 we jus stayed here n did NOTHING !! aggain


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:: 2004 22 June :: 10.49pm
:: Mood: bouncy
:: Music: b0uncin 0ff the walls again


---> leave a comment kill me with a sledge hammer and like it !!

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:: 2004 21 June :: 10.11pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: worst december

`Im sick today =[ .. Kae markus nick n i were soposed to go to ft myers beach . . . but kaela didnt wake up till 4 s0o then i was g0nna g0 t0 green wellz with nick mark n daniela but i didnt feel g0od i have a fever n a head ace =/ but h0pefully ill be better s0on =D..

im gonna hang out with steph s0on..
shes one of my best friends but we have only reason hung out just me-and-her twice ..
the 1st time i met jeremy really liked him but that turned out horrible one of the worst things thats ever happened.. like 2 weeks later i almost got raped, killed because of him .. the second time i met nick .. one the best things thats ever happened.. =]...

mm s0o i wonder wut will happen this time =]

My heart is b a r e l y beating
All I want to do is lie in bed with you
All I really ever n-e-e-d is you
All I got to do is g~i~v~e up all I have to be with you
All I want to do is to be close to *you*
All I want to do is to be [ n e x t 2 y 0 u
All I want is you to g-i-v-e u-p all we had to be
I canít remember why Iím here
all i really ever needed is y0u

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:: 2004 21 June :: 12.58am
:: Mood: rejected

this is copied from livejournal..
Jesus how can you care about someone soo much but they could care less about you? I need *were going to call this person sunshine they will know who they are* sunshine. I need them more than anything, i really do. And she doesnt even care about meh anymore. Now that she has her!! I mean i have a new like best friend too but sunshine hates mah new best friend, it would be alot better if i could hate her new best friend too.I wish i could hate her new best friend soo much, but shes a sweetheart, and after just talkin to her, theres no way that i can hate her. I meah shes perfect for sunshine, jus like i used to be. We used to be soo close, i thought taht we would be friends forever, i thought taht we would seriously grow up together and never truely be apart. But i guess that i was wrong. But i guess theres nothin that i can do, i mean ppl grow apart rite? Things change, and so do ppl. I always thought that we would change, i jus always thought taht we would change together. I am like nothin without her, and no matter how gay that sounds its seriously true. I feel like i have nothing and i am nothing. I guess tahts wat you get for making someone your life. I guess that its time to move on..but i cant. I really cant. I have no idea wtf to do. So for now, ill jus cry, and cry, and cry some more. <--I jus dont know how im going to live without her.

--> i jus need to know wat to do, wat am i going to do withot her? I cant imagine anything without her. I jus wish things could get bak to normal, i wish that things could go bak to the way they used to be, i wish that i could have mah sunshine back!! *If you read this, tell meh what im supposed to do without you, i know you know who are you, so jus tell meh wat to do!! I dont think i can live without you*

Urgh well ima jus go to bed n cry or sumthing..and Ali jean if you read this DONT GET THE WRONG IDEA!! Dont go off thinkin that i hate you, cuz i dont!! i really dont i luhv u soo fuckin mcuh and u mean a whole hellof alot to meh, so dont think anythin diff, i do luhv you!! Its jus..i jus..urgh u know wat im tryin to say..I jus luhv u and ims orry dont get mad at meh ='(

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:: 2004 20 June :: 7.13pm
:: Mood: drained
:: Music: `* Sum weird s0ng

I could die from the words that you say..
Im HOME !! =]
I g0t h0me .. friiidayy and kaela came over and we watched some weird ass m0vies l0l - passi0n netw0rk , sex monster, l0rd of the g- strings lma0 * we went to bed round 7 am nick n markus w0ke us up at lyk 2 and told us to come over .. we were way 2 tired s0 we didnt c0me 0ver till 6iish .. saw nick for the first time in s0o long =D i missed him s0o0o much ! ..we hung out at marks for a while and watched m0vies ..markus n me were lyk kiddingly hittin each other n he acted lyk i gave him a bl0ody n0se n everyone was yellin at me n i felt so0o0 bad n then he said he was kidding and he was fine =P then went to nicks n g0t thr0wn in the p0ol .. saw my lil sister kayla tattor tot !! but she left today for ky so im not gonna see her for a while =[... we went h0me r0und 11 and went t0 sleep @ lyk 4 n today we jus sat around and went int0 gay n lesbian chatr0omz .. l0l ..

i love kaela kayla n nich0las

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:: 2004 19 June :: 7.15pm
:: Music: mark moaning lol

hey hey hey

Hey britt itz daniela.. ha ha ur sittin on the bed wiy nick! yay! ur back <3..
i hope to c u alot ova tha suma until school starts..! u need 2 get into mariner!!!
i hope u have fun at ida tho! i love u!!!
xOx Daniela

i love marK

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