Overhead the albatross hangs motionless upon the air And deep beneath the rolling waves In labyrinths of coral caves The echo of a distant tide Comes willowing across the sand And everything is green and submarine


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:: 2005 4 July :: 11.52 am
:: Mood: drained

i had an amazing weekend. goodbye for 5 weeks. take care


:: 2005 28 June :: 1.20 am
:: Music: drug ballad

nanan nanan na
That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow when you swallow it all
wallow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow your probably gonna wanna do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend, screw it
and whats a little bit of alcohol poisoning? and whats a little fight,
tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life, live it however you wanna
Marajuana is everywhere, where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're goin
Cuz none of this shit's gonna mean shit where we're goin
They tell you to stop but you just sit there ignorin, even though you wake up
feelin like shit every mornin.
But your young, you got a lot of drugs to do, girls to screw, parties to
crash, sucks to be you
If I could take it all back now I wouldn't, I woulda did more shit that
people said that I shouldnt
But I'm all grown up now, and upgraded and graduated to better drugs and
But I still gotta a lot of growin up to do, I still gotta whole lot of
throwin up to spew
But when it's all said and done before I know it I'll be forty wit a 40 on
the porch tellin stories
with a bottle of Jack, two grandkids on my lap, babysitting for Hailey, while
Hailey's out gettin shmashed.

they got a hold of me

i must get sleep because in the morning.....i shall compare the interactions between humans and insects. i cant wait.

1 suck | blown

:: 2005 19 June :: 11.09 am

i gots my own dorm room bitches

3 suck | blown

:: 2005 16 June :: 3.53 am
:: Mood: tweaked
:: Music: mah fan movin some air

its 4am im up
whatup friends. phish, floyd, good movies, herb, homiez

thats about all ive been doin lately, although im still trying to figure out how to move all this shit from my room into a dorm room by sat. who knows. who knows why im awake at 4 am. oh i do. i ate some dum dum stuff earlier and ive been up all night. it sucks cuz i had some people over tonight, and now imstill the only party hardy awake. my homes vadim is passed out on de couch. so whos up for chillin? cuz im wide awake.
inspire me bitches
cuz whats life without inspiration

2 suck | blown

:: 2005 14 June :: 1.25 pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: digital ash in a digital urn

wellllp i leave for college in less than one week, over this time im there i know there willl be people ill never see again, so to anyone and alll that reads this its been a real real good time. i wish i could go boating again this summer, jacob if iget outof school in time ill drive to kansas. after all that school a vaca would be niceee

1 suck | blown

:: 2005 27 May :: 12.10 am
:: Mood: melancholy

im not like other people. ive figured that out. getting the fuck out of c-town in a matter of weeks. gloryyears here we come? lets hope

2 suck | blown

:: 2005 9 May :: 11.10 pm
:: Music: bright eyes - lover i dont have to love

i love it
1. First best friend: sean vetor
2. First person you loved: megan courtney
3. First real kiss: anna shumway! haha (liz lux does not count as "real")
4. First screen name: johnnyz109
5. First pet: fishes
6. First car: 91 celica gt

1. Last cigarette: 1 hr. ago
2. Last kiss: friday night
3. Last good cry: dont know
4. Last beverage drank: coors light
5. Last food consumed: steak
6. Last crush: courtney
7. Last phone call: jimmy

1. Who is your best friend: i dont.
2. Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend: no

1. Where are your favorite places to shop: dont know. teees.
2. Favorite item of clothing: jeans

1. Do you do drugs: yes
2. What kind of shampoo do you use: i dont know, this stuff in a green bottle
3. What are you most scared of: myself
4. What would you change about yourself: im not sure

1. Colors: green
2. Foods: pizza, tacos, steak
3. Subject in school: whats school?
4. Animals: cat
5. Sports: basketball
6. Movie: i love donnie darko

1. Given anyone a bath: no
2. Smoked: yes
3. Made yourself throw-up: yes
4. Skinny dipped: yes
5. Been in love: yes

1. Clothes: khaki shorts long-sleeve shirt
2. Music: muse - time is running out
3. Make-up: no. i dont do that.
4. IMs: brianna, jake

2. Hugged: courtney
3. IMed: jake
4. Last person who slept at your house: dont know
5. Last persons house you slept at: matt albertos

1. In the morning I am: tired
2. Love is: what you make it
3. I dream about: everything you can imagine

1. 7 years ago: i rode my bike and played a gameboy
2. 4 years ago: was a really weird time.
3. 2 years ago: i was doing really fucked up things.
4. 1 hour ago: chillin with some homes drinkin some coors
5. tomorrow: tuesday
6. college:iu
7. 5 years from now: where the hell could i be.

1 suck | blown

:: 2005 8 May :: 12.34 pm

last night was prom. i was up till 8am drinking, and im stilll drunkk at 12:34. 1234. a good night


:: 2005 25 April :: 9.17 pm
:: Mood: excited
:: Music: moe - kids

oh baby
this is great. im so happy, i found a date to prom tonight. her name is courtney and shes one hot mama. shes so nice too. oooooooweee i cant wait now. off to get a tux. and some bucks. cause theres no way shes gonna be payin for her meal. im excited.

1 suck | blown

:: 2005 23 April :: 1.49 pm

When you were here before, couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel, your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts, I wanna have control
I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice, when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here, ohhh ohhhh

She's running out the door...
She's running out, she's run, run, run, run....run....

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

I WANT YOU TO NOTICE. whenimmmnooootarrrouuunnddd.
that im a creep.

i dont belong here

1 suck | blown

:: 2005 17 April :: 12.29 am

i believe i am going to fly away


:: 2005 10 April :: 8.57 pm
:: Mood: relaxed
:: Music: strokes

real tite
i had a good spring break. now under 50 days of high school left. oh yes oh yeah its gonna be alright im gonna be a freshman again. colllegeee. ive heard many adults say the next 4 years of my life will be the best years of my life. lets seeee about that one. oh yeah i met this girl that im gonna take to prom over spring break shes real cool/pretty, oh yeah i have to ask first

Salvador Dali is an amazing artist

4 suck | blown

:: 2005 13 March :: 8.37 pm

why didnt i check the chapel first. i went into the youth center, back to the old desert theater room, then drove my car to the front of the church, went inside the front and finally found it. but i was to late. i left because im already having enough trouble right now dealing with my family to listen to my friends "have to talk to me later" and be pissed off at me. now why would i want to listen to that somewhere i go where i wish i could just hang out and be glad to see everyone again. but my kind aint wanted round dem parts....yeah thats the best way to say it, perfect. this only pertains to a couple of people, so dont assume im talking to you. happy to see me or ready to get on my case? because really i could care less to talk to you if its getting on my case.

im now leaving to yell somewhere in a really confined area

2 suck | blown

:: 2005 13 March :: 11.25 am
:: Mood: sleepy

i have dreams with girls that i shouldn't be dreaming about


:: 2005 8 March :: 3.18 pm

got to get you into my life

i swear the blinds were wavy, one thing ive learned this weekend is that you always need the straight kid. always.


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