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:: 2005 6 January :: 11.48 am
:: Mood: blah

i hate snow. but i hate driving in snow more.

do u love life?


:: 2005 5 January :: 12.00 am
:: Mood: blank

well it is a new year, yet im not sure it is as blissful and exciting as it should be. i've come to several conclusions about myself in the past week or so, but im still utterly confused as to my purpose- oh well though.

1.) i will never get married. i find that i lose interest in guys way too fast.

2.) i will never find a job that i absolutely love. because there is nothing that i absolutely love (aside from my family and friends).

3.) i cant trust anybody, considering my "supposed" best friend of 8 years really isnt my best friend at all. i was being used the entire time. fun shit i tell ya.

4.) i decided to start smoking again. i smoked my first new years - it had been like 2.5/3 months and my lungs crave it as they used too. ahh what a wonderful feeling.

5.) school starts tomorrow and im not really looking forward to it. but i dont care. thats my motto for the new year "i dont care". it works wonders to any problematic situation that may enter my life.

tsk tsk. it is bedtime for me tho. so i will see all of u children later. ta ta for now. (who says that seriously?)

1 people love life | do u love life?


:: 2004 16 December :: 9.22 am
:: Mood: bored

for lack of anything better to do...how pathetic...

Long Survey About Yourself

Created by bleedwithoutreason and taken 12109 times on bzoink!

What time are you starting this?8:28am
Name?Jillian
Nicknames?Jill
Date of birth?July 6, 1986
Sex?yes please
Height?5'3.5
Eye color?blue
Where were you born?detroit, mi
Number of candles on your last birthday cake?18
Pets?a beagle, but shes more of a family pet then my own
Hair color?brownish/blondish - but i need to re-dye it soon...any suggestions?
Piercings?ears
Town you live in?fremont
Favorite foods?pasta and subs...aside from anything containing sugar
Ever been to Africa?nope
Been toilet papering?yup
Love someone so much it made you cry?my friends...
Been in a car accident?many...way too many...
Croutons or bacon bits?croutons, believe it or not, theyre better for you
Favorite day of the week?dont really have a favorite - weekends are alright i guess
Favorite resturant?spankys - ha uh no...probly applebees or olive garden, cookers and damons are good too
Favorite flower?dont like flowers
Favorite sport to watch?xtreme sports, football, hockey
Favorite drink?strawberry shakes, water, watermelon pucker
Favorite ice cream flavor?cookie dough, vanilla, butter pecan
Warner Bros. or Disney?disney - even though im thoroughly convinced that they are polluting the minds of our future generations...
Favorite fast food restuarant?burger king hands down
Carpet color in your bedroom?wood floor
How many times did you fail your driver's test?surprisingly none - the guy was an idiot
Whom did you get your last email from?kate in soc
Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?hmmm...rue 21?
What do you do most often when you are bored?call people and attempt to make plans
Most annoying thing to say to me?"you work at spankys?!?" - no im not a fuckin stripper!!!
Bedtime?whenever im tired...
Favorite TV show?life as we know it (dino *sigh*)
Last person you went out to dinner with?:jami and philly...the peanut shells thing still bugs me
Been out of country?yup
Believe in magick?nope
Ford or Chevy?ford
What are you listening to right now?ryan's watching spongebob
Have you ever failed a grade?nope
If you have, what grade did you fail?---
Do you have a crush on someone?im not sure anymore
Do you have a bf/gf?nope
If so, what is their name?---
How long have you been together?---
What are you wearing right now?jeans and a pink shirt
Would you have sex before marriage?i have - healthy sex is vital to a healthy relationship; i wouldnt wanna vow to spend the rest of my life with someone that i later find out is terrible in bed...
Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?nope
Are you a virgin?no
Do you smoke?i used to, but it was a weakness i was able to overcome
Do you drink?yes
Are you ghetto?no im extremely white
Are you a player?some would say so, but i dont think so
What are your favorite colors?pastels...(did i spell that right? i know that pastel is cake in espanol so i wasnt sure)
What is your favorite animal?dont really have a fav
Do you have any birthmarks?yup
Have you ever gotten your ass kicked?not that i remember
Who do you talk to most on the phone?jami
Have you ever been slapped?yes
Do you get online a lot?i used to...until my computer died...
Are you shy or outgoing?i guess a combo of both - depends on the mood you catch me in
Do you shower?on a daily basis
Do you hate school?no, do i like it? not really
Do you have a social life?i guess
How easily do you trust people?too easily...i'll bare my soul to anyone, then i throw my guard up so i dont get hurt
Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?im sure i have secrets - but im not sure people would be surprised knowing
Would you ever sky dive?hell yea! im terrified of heights - to be able to overcome that means i have one less weakness
Do you like to dance?umm kinda but i cant dance to save my life
Have you ever been out of state?yup
Do you like to travel?depends who im with - but yea i do
Have you ever been expelled from school?nope
Have you ever been suspended from school?nope - but they threatened to cuz of the dress code violations - stupid shit
Do you want to get out of your hometown?*shrug* i jus wanna be happy - i dont care where i am
Are you spoiled?some would say so; others would say im blessed - it's open to interpretation
Are you a brat?maybe when i want to be...?
Have you ever been dumped?i dont date so i guess this is a no
Have you ever gotten high?yea - not anymore tho, im done with that shit
Do you like snapple?no
Do you drink a lot of water?yes
What toothpaste do you use?whatevers in the bathroom
Do you have a cell phone?yes
Do you have a curfew?not really
Who do you look up to?i dont know
Are you a role model?dear god i hope not
Have you ever been to Six Flags or Cedar Point?yea a long time ago
What name brand do you wear the most?charlotte russe maybe? i dunno
What kind of jewelry do you wear?silver necklace; yellow and pink jelly bracelets
What do you want pierced?for the longest time, i wanted my clit pierced. but then i found out that even tho you'll orgasm for like a week, u never will again. so i'd say my belly button
Do you like takin pictures?umm sure
Do you like gettin your picture taken?no - not photogenic at all. waste of film. plus it usually ends up as a bad blackmail anyways
Do you have a tan?maybe equivalent to that of an albino?
Do you get annoyed easily?depends on my mood
Have you ever started a rumor?i dont think so
Do you have your own phone or phone line?yea a cell
Do you have your own pool?ummm no i make like $6/hour...
Do you prefer boxers or briefs?i wear boxers to bed sometimes...
Do you have any siblings?yup 3 sisters, and 1 brother
Have you ever been played?yes
Have you ever played anyone?yes
Do you get along with your parents?sometimes, it seems like the more we argue, the more of my life they find out about
How do you vent your anger?i bottle it up inside, and dont let people know anything is wrong...i dont like to burden others with my problems
Have you ever ran away?i guess you could say so
Have you ever been fired from a job?no
Do you even have a job?yea
Do you daydream a lot?i zone out a lot if thats what you mean
Do you have a lot of ex's?i dont date so how can i?
Do you run your mouth?maybe sometimes
What do you want a tattoo of?i havent decided
What do you have a tattoo of?i dont yet - not til i figure out what i want it of
What does your ex bf/gf look like?i dunno - i havent seen him in a long time
What does your most recent crush look like?little taller than me; built
Whats her/his name?aaron
Have you ever been bitched out?psh who hasnt
Are you rude?i can be...but i try not to be
What was the last compliment you recieved?i dunno
Do you like getting dirty?depends....
Are you flexiable?i used to be...now im just lazy
What is your heritage?german/polish/irish/scottish/bohemian
What is your lucky number?5
What does your hair look like right now?short, brownish/blondish - craving a new dye job - kinda flipped out however the hell it wants to
Could you ever be a vegetarian?no i like chicken too much
Describe your looks?short
If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what color?i have no idea - i was thinking maybe burgandy or brown - im tired of the blond
Would you ever date someone younger than you?i dont think so, girls mature faster then guys anyways
Would you ever date someone older than you?sure
When was the last time you were drunk?last saturday with manda
How many rings until you answer the phone?depends who it is and how close i am to it when it rings
Have you ever been skinny dipping?long time ago
If yes, when was the last time?i was probly 7th grade - with melissa, just so we could say that we did
When was the last time you went on a date?depends on your def of a date - i used to go out to eat with aaron a lot, but i wouldnt call them 'dates'
Do you look more like your mother or father?i think im a godd solid combo of both
Do you cry a lot?when im depressed and my world feels like it is crumbling to pieces
Do you ever cry to get your way?no - i dont like to cry
What phrase do you use most when on the phone?*shrug*
Are you the romantic type?maybe
Have you ever been chased by cops?haha yea - u gotta love ts
What do you like most about your body?its a lil curvy i guess
What do you like least about your body?i have short legs and boobs - i hate boobs
When did you have your first crush?1st grade
When was the last time you threw up?worst hangover ever...sometime mid nov
In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?unlike justin, i dont have a preference (im jus playin hon)
Do you ever wear shirts do show your belly?nah, waste of a shirt...if i wanted to show my belly - id wear a bikini top
What about cleavage?guilty
Is your best friend a virgin?which best friend?
Have you ever fucked someone up?i dont really get this ?
Have you ever been fucked up?dont get this one either
What theme does your room have?no theme - jus stuff randomly throw places
What size show do you wear?"show"? oooo you mean shoe...8
What is your screen name on AIM?unbleachedblond
How are you feeling right now?kinda tired and depressed
When was the last time you were at a party?saturday
Have you ever given a lapdance?ummm ive tried...lol jami...im just too white to dance
Have you ever recieved one?nope
Has there ever been a rumor spread about you?psh when hasnt there been
What is one of your bad qualilties?im way to vulnerable, i dont like to hurt anyone's feelings, im too honest
What is one of your good qualilties?i like to make people happy?
Would you marry for money?no
What do you drive?currently, a 93 taurus...but i may not be driving come mid jan...
Are you more of a mommys or daddys child?a little of both, probly more of daddy's little girl
So?what?
Well?go away
When was the last time you cried in school?ummm i dont remember...
Would you ever hook up with the same sex?no
What kind of music do you like?*shrug* anything with a beat
Would you ever bungee jump?hell yea
What is your worst fear?unintentionally hurting someone so bad that it scars their life
Would you ever join the army?id be willing to but i jus dont have the balls to do it
Do you like cows?i like cheeseburgers...
If you were to die today, what would you do?*shrug* i dunno; im gunna die eventually-my life kinda lacks an importance so it wouldnt really matter much what i were to do
If you had one last word to say to someone before you die, what would it b?*shrug*
Do you like to party?yup
Hearts or broken hearts?dont get it
Moons or stars?ummm stars?
Coke or pepsi?coke - but pop is just empty sugars that make u gain weight - its so bad for you
Favorite scent?love spell, food
Favorite band?no fav
Would you ever dye your hair red?maybe...it would look horrid with my complextion tho
How many languages can you speak?2 somewhat fluently - but random words from about 3 other languages
What time are you finishing this?9:21 - what a waste of an hour - o well

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2 people love life. | do u love life?


:: 2004 24 November :: 12.26 pm
:: Mood: blah

it is official. im a bad driver.



btw...i think im falling for him. granted ive only just met him, but we jus seem to click:D



ok im a dork.

do u love life?


:: 2004 22 November :: 12.49 pm
:: Mood: giddy

boys boys boys
i made a friend the other nite at maria and melissa's 20th b-day party. he is a male version of me.we talked for like 6 hours! *sigh* i think i like him...:P

3 people love life. | do u love life?


:: 2004 16 November :: 11.14 am
:: Mood: bored

(X) I have been drunk
(x) I have kissed a member of the opposite sex
( ) I have kissed a member of the same sex
( ) I crashed a friend's car
( ) I have been to Japan
( ) I rode in a taxi
( ) I have been in love
(X) I've had sex
(X) I've had sexual relations in public
(X) I've shoplifted
( ) I have been fired
( ) I have cut myself on purpose\
(X) I have smoked pot
(X) I still smoke pot :(
( ) I've had a 3-some
(X) I've snuck out of my parent's house
( ) I have been tied up. (yes...in THAT way)
( ) I pissed on myself
( ) I have been arrested
(X) I've made out with a stranger
( ) I've stolen something from my job
( ) I've celebrated New Year's in Time Square
( ) I've gone on a blind date
(X) I've lied to a friend
( ) I've had a crush on a teacher
( ) I've celebrated Mardi-Gras in New Orleans
( ) I have been to Europe
(X) I've skipped school
( ) I have thrown up in a bar
( ) I have purposely set myself on fire
(X) I have eaten sushi
( ) I have been snowboarding
( ) I have been happy with myself
( ) I have met a movie star
( ) I had sex in a pool
(X) I went to a dance with someone of the same sex
( ) I've bungee jumped
(X) I have been to a pop concert
( ) I have dated someone for over a year
( ) I sold naked pictures of myself
(X) I have been in a car accident
(X) I have slept in the nude
(X) I've eaten cheesecake
( ) I've had jury duty
(X) I've hated someone without knowing them
(X) I have given oral sex
(X) I have recieved oral sex
(X) I've shot a real gun
( ) I've ran around with my trousers around my ankles
(X) I've had sex with someone within a week of meeting them
( ) I've done ecstasy
( ) I've gotten my ass kicked
(X) I've been caught smoking
( ) I've worn boxers
( ) I've milked a cow
(X) I've got in a verbal fight with a teacher
( ) I've cheated on someone
( ) had sex with a best friend
( ) Lied one time in this survey
( ) Lied more then once in this survey.
(X) Lied to a friend you see everyday
(X) Kissed a person that has a g/f or b/f
( ) Used ice cubes as a foreplay accessory
(X) Wasted time filling this out instead of doing something productive
( ) Have nude pics of yourself on your computer
( ) Walked across 8 lanes of interstate highway
(X) Have been to camp
(X) Have read books more than one time
( ) Have eaten cat food
(X) Have been pulled over by a cop (
( ) Own porn
(X) Am a Republican
( ) Likes classic movies
( ) Own a kitty
( ) Carried a lunchbox in high school
(X) Buy gumballs to watch them swirl in the machine
( ) Likes to be dominated
(X) Likes to drive with the windows down and the music turned up
(X) Eats PB &J for breakfast because there's nothing else

do u love life?


:: 2004 15 November :: 8.25 am
:: Mood: contemplative

well, my offer has been refused by way too many people. i suppose i'll haveta write that paper by myself. :(

congrats go out to marty and jessica!!!

im so flippin tired of pizza. i think its cuz its whats usually for dinner when im not workin. o well, i'll get over it.

wow. this is a first, i have like nothing to say...

other than i wanna get married...i jus need to find my soulmate.

cya.

1 people love life | do u love life?


:: 2004 1 November :: 12.59 pm
:: Mood: bored

random thoughts
me and jami were talking and wanted to plan a girls thing right? well, we are all booked solid and cant do anything till the beginning of dec!!! how sad is that.

congrats justin:D

i bought a 93 gold taurus. picking it up tonite.

i work too much.

scottie - can i ride with u to jessa's wedding?

for some reason, jus cuz i was wearing my senior sweatshirt today, my cj class thought i was a cheerleader. umm no, most definately not. i was deeply offended by the comment.

i broke my nail.

hopefully my grant money is coming next week...then i can pay everyone off.

its unanimous. we have bad luck with cars. in the past 3 weeks, i was in 2 accidents, jami was in 1, maria and melissa's tire shredded, and then after they got that fixed, there was a glitch in the electircal system (they drive a lumina). amanda's fuel pump went out on her, and she hit 2 deer, andre hit a deer, and maria and melissa's mom just hit a deer. We have some seriously bad luck with cars - look out...but then again, that's going to end now that i get a new car.

my hearing is on the 23rd.

thats all for now. i ran out of things to say and i have class in like 20 minutes. cya!

4 people love life. | do u love life?


:: 2004 27 October :: 10.19 pm
:: Mood: goofy

hah this is so me...

Take the quiz: "What Kinda Kiss R U?"

Playful Kiss
The playful kiss is about you having fun and not needing to have feelings for that person. You just go with the flow!

do u love life?


:: 2004 27 October :: 6.24 pm
:: Mood: cheerful

hello everyone.

life is almost good. im alive. i was in my worst accident yet (and hopefully my last). on tuesday, oct 13 (?) at approximately 8:15 am, i pulled out of my driveway and started heading down the road. it was really foggy and i had come up to the intersection. at this intersection, i have a stop sign, as did the person directly across from me. we let a few cars pass, and then, seeing it was clear to go, i proceeded through the intersection. all of a sudden i felt myself getting hit. at the time, i didnt know what had happened. i just knew that my head was pounding and that i had been hit. what had happened, was that a white pickup truck, driving without its headlights, had hit me from the right. the truck pushed my beautiful, brand-new car into a van that had been waiting to turn. i cried. i was scared. a paramedic broke the window on the back passenger side, so that she could crawl into my car and support my neck. they thought my neck was broken. then they covered me up with a blanket because not only was it cold, but they had to use the jaws of life to get my door open. then they proceeded to put me into a neck/body brace, put me on a board which eventually went into the ambulance. i rode their with the lady driving the truck. the verdict: i have a guradian angel - i lucked out with several bruises. the lady had to have open heart surgery because she tore her aorta and smashed her elbow. but yea my car is absolutely demolished and im broke as hell. but on the upside, my pops said he can loan me some money to get a new car. the one im lookin at is a 93 (movin up, yea i know) taurus. ah well - life is fun. but im out cuz i gotta paper to bs. later.

...oyea...i gotta ticket for failing to yield...but im fighting it cuz 1.) she didnt have her lights on; 2.) i dont wanna pay the $95 and 3.) it coulda happened to anyone.

do u love life?


:: 2004 4 October :: 2.49 pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: that stupid circus song that ive had stuck in my head for like 2 months...

yup, my computer is still down. it really kinda sux...a lot. o well tho - i dont have much time to be on the comp anyways.

lets see...
i gotta new car. paid $975. nothing wrong with it. its a 92 gray mercury sable.

the other nite, melissa put a hole in one of my sweaters with a cigarette. she fell asleep. we still laugh about it.

my hailey is as gorgous as ever. shes teething now. god i love her so much. she is one of the main reasons i look forward to getting up in the morning.

classes are alright. cj is ok with the exception that there is an annoying arab guy in there. o well i'll get over it. i got a 82% on my first test. woohoo!

i still dont like my soc prof. she makes a living by pulling the race card. she thinks that all white ppl are out to get blacks. yea dont like her.

well i gotsta go pick up the sister...catch ya all later.

2 people love life. | do u love life?


:: 2004 8 September :: 2.59 pm
:: Mood: blank

randomness
hi. it's been a while so i figured i should probly update.

college started. too much like high school. soc is boring. my english prof is a bitch. and math is tedious. hopefully CJ will be better.

they cut my hours at work down to 20. fun shit. oyea and my boss hired her older sister so she could keep an eye on us...nice.

my hailey is beautiful and the most gorgeous and vibrant child ive ever met. i love her so much that its beyond words. i miss her dearly because i havent been home much and havent been able to hold her recently. she is 8 weeks old i think (july 13).

kirsten's birthday is tomorrow. i haveta get her a card.

i feel like a bad friend. ive been "not-purposely" neglecting several of my groups of freinds - like melissa, kyle, heath etc.

if anyone reading this talks to pat regularly, have him call me.

i might get a new car to replace my totalled one. its a red ford tempo gl. it looks alright and i dont know if anything is wrong with it. but its only $500 and anythings better than my pos.
i have to go pick up my sister from school tho so im out. cya.

2 people love life. | do u love life?


:: 2004 5 August :: 2.48 pm
:: Mood: chipper

hello. and how are all of you out there? im doing just fine.

work has been busy but is fun as usual. im getting a good 25 hours a week so that yields a rather nice paycheck.

philly is getting married this weekend. im so happy for him and holly. they are so cute together and hopefully they'll have a wonderful married life together.

melissa is being kinda distant lately so im not sure whats goin on with her. somethings wrong and shes not too willing to share it with me. i know that she misses maria dreadfully - maria is in gr caring for an older couple that are both dying of cancer and is unable to come home very much.

i guess im excited for the future - or at least moreso then i originally was. college life will be a whole new experience with new people and im eagerly awaiting the transition from hs to college. its sad tho in a sense, because several people close to me are indeed preparing for such changes, yet they are doing so far away. it saddens me - with justin in chicago, paulie in cali and kyle in florida - im gunna miss them dearly but im sure we'll manage to stay in touch. i just need to learn to let go...it'll be all good.

we had a very sporadic day yesterday. me and aut were dropping off clothes at goodwill, when aut saw this "gravity rider" and had to buy it. we wedged it into the back seat of my car - which it barely fit. i was driving practicully on top of the steering wheel. but its fun. i like it. maybe if i start using it regularly then i'll get myself back into shape. that'll be nice.

but im out cuz i gotsta work in a couple hours. cya later.

1 people love life | do u love life?


:: 2004 19 July :: 5.23 pm
:: Mood: chipper

wow - its been a long ass time since i updated this thingy huh?

im still workin...about 20-25 hours a week. i need the money bad tho. i didnt get around to getting my financial aid in on time so im stuck paying $1002.00 for tuition by augost 2. of course i cant afford it and neither can my parents. but theyre very insistent that i continue my education so theyre gunna try to spot me the $ and otherwise im gunna have to look to my sis for maybe some help - but she has tuition due too so i dont see how she can help me much. i mean i can pay her back but i jus dont know...im too damn lazy.

on the brighter side, my mom had her baby, a little . Hailey Michelle was born on tuesday, july 13 at 9:55pm. she weighed 8lbs and is 21 inches long. both mommy and baby are fine. im a big sister...again! :D

my comps busted...so im stuck usin the librarys - fun ...

but anyways - i'll talk to yall later.

*waves*

do u love life?


:: 2004 16 June :: 8.50 pm
:: Mood: calm

wow. havent updated this thing in a while.

i am finally graduated.

i know. my parents were shocked too.

my schedule is still as chaotic as ever.

our internet is dead with the exception of aim. that means no email, woohu or anything. (im at my sister's right now.)

my mommy is due in almost 1 month.

my 18th bday is in like 2 1/2 weeks.

and oddly ive run out of things to say. have a nice day!

do u love life?

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