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Extremely Strange.......

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:: 2004 27 September :: 8.30 pm
:: Mood: blah

So yeah.....i was told today that i was being used. Which, in most cases, isnt really what you like to hear.

I was told that this girl wants to go back to how she used to be. Being with every guy, doing things with every guy, and just playing a lot of guy. So....her use me and make me think that she actually has feelings for me back. She just wants to be with a guy to get back into her rythem of things and how she used to be. All of this is complete horseshit too because she's the one thats liked me for like a year now. It just pisses me off cause she kept this thing going when she knew she shouldn't. Actually....she doesn't even know any of this yet. I plan on telling her we'll see what she says tomorrow. more than likely i'm gonna make her feel like a dumbass. so i think i'm gonna need a new homecoming date lol.

Anyways.....yeah i'm tired and bored. I'm working things out with a friend right now. Its so good to talk to her. I really do miss our friendship. But its ok cause things will be better and we will be best friends again.


5 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 6 September :: 7.00 pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Nelly-My Place

My weekend....
Well. My weekend was very.....interesting. I went to the game on Thursday with Brianna, Marisa, Tyler, and Ben. Then me and Marisa went back and stayed the night at Brianna's house after the game. We just hung out and played cards and stuff. Then i went home friday. Saturday night i went to Jessica's house cause her parents were having a party and they invited i went. I went home at about midnight. Then Jessica's older sister Lindsey called me at 4:30 in the mornin cause she got kicked out of her parents party. She was i had to go pick her up and take her home so she didnt have to walk home. In the mean time.....Brianna called me to see if she could stay at my house cause there were s ome troubles going on.....but i wasn't home to answer my cell phone. So.....bummer for her. Then i went golfing with my dad about 2 hours later after i got home from taking linsey to her house. I was very tired.

So then sunday night i picked up Brie and we went to the mall. Then we came back to my house and watched a movie. Then we went to the movie theater and saw a movie lol . Then we came back to my house and she stayed the night at my house. I took her home at about 3 today. And here i am.

Very weird weekend i had, but oh well. Now i can't wait to go back to school tomorrow where i finally start my senior year. YIPPY!!!!!!


5 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 30 August :: 3.39 pm
:: Mood: bored

So here's the schedule for my senior year.

1st hour........JA Economics with Mr. Busen
2nd hour........Office Aid
3rd hour.........drama III with Harnden
4th hour.........Modern Lit with Mr. Stark
5th hour.........Biology with Fornier
6th hour.........Advanced P.E. with Busen

So overall i guess its a pretty good schedule.....

How does it feel?

:: 2004 26 August :: 11.24 pm
:: Mood: crushed

Ya know......i've learned that relationships are just not my thing. Its like learning a new sport not knowing anything about how to play. I don't even know who i am anymore. I thought things would work out with me and her, but i guess i was wrong. No matter what, i always dig myself a whole that i fall into. It either gets deeper.....or i get smaller. I'm always being walked on. I've been crushed more times than what i wanted to. And its such a horrible feeling. I thought i was a good guy to be in a relationship with. It turns out me and relationships are like the same sides as a magnet. We repel. Relationships are just a conquest in life. A challange that everyone must face. A challange that i can't overcome. A challange that i'm not going to face for a long time. I put myself in these situations that arent meant to be. And i think its about time that i stop doing what i want......and start doing what i feel.

I'm sure none of this makes any sense to any of you. So dont bother reading.....


3 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 2 August :: 5.25 pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: Juvenile-slow motion

So yeah, i went to JD's house saturday night. But i went and saw The Village before hand, and it was the dumbest movie possible. I encourage you guys to NOT go and see it. But yeah, i went to JD's after the movie. We had some people over. It was me, jd, collin, tyler, slinky, ashley, and brianna. We had a good time.

Yesterday i went golfing with randy. Thats always a good time. Then we went and ate dinner at his house. After a while we went to tyler's house and stayed the night there. Along with collin, slinky, logan, tyler, and brianna. The only people that stayed the night was me, randy, tyler, and brianna. We had alot of fun.

So yeah that was my weekend.

.......waiting for her to call.


How does it feel?

:: 2004 27 July :: 11.17 pm
:: Mood: I really feel like shit right now.

So yeah......i really dont even know why i sit here and come back to this stupid journal anymore. I guess i couldn't take all the drama. But now i'm kinda falling back on it again cause i just dont really have anybody to talk to anymore. Its the summer time and things that i need to say and when i need to vent.....people just arent here lately. So this is where it leads me......a white box where i type what i think and feel. But hey what ever works i guess.

Anyways.....i think i'm gonna go to Wub's house wednesday night and stay there a while. And i think i'm deffinately gonna have a party before we go back to school. And i deffinately ran out of things to say.


How does it feel?

:: 2004 15 July :: 10.53 am

Well, yesterday was interesting. I was at the golf course with my dad when somebody said there is a crazy guy out in the fields and woods on Wiersma road. I was like whoa, cause i live there. I guess earlier he beat up this 60 year old man and took his money. Then went to Scott Cook's house cause they are friends. Well Scott lives 5 houses east of my house. And i guess the cops were called on him and they were out there lookin for him. I mean alot of cops. County, State, helicopters, news crews, FBI agents and the dogs were out too. I went down simmons to go home at about 8pm and the cops had the road blocked off. Nobody could go down the road. So i sat there waiting to go home for about 2 hours. It was scary cause all my doors to my house were unlocked. I would always ask the state cop blocking the road whats going on and where is he headed and everything. At one point he told me he was behind Scott Cook's house and was heading west. Which would put him right around the back of my house. The wierd thing about all this is my dad is friends with this guy. His name was Adam Bauer. My parents used to work with him about 15 years ago at a factory called Wolverine. He's also a customer at my parents store. My dad is kinda shocked about it all cause Adam wouldn't hurt anybody. I've met him a few times and he's a nice guy. So why he beat the shit out of that old guy is beyond me. But anyways......that was my day.


2 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 13 July :: 1.56 am
:: Mood: I dont know.

Well......its been quite the time since i've been on here. But dont expect me to be on here very often. I just thought i would catch up on a few things.

I'm not going to texas to visit my mom this summer. Which really sucks. And on top of that....she's getting married as well.

It was good to talk to you last night. It seems that your confused though. I know you miss me and miss us. And it would seem to me that you would miss being us as well. Which isnt the case right now. It doesn't make much sense to me....but you're confused. I just want everything to be figured out with me and you so i know what to do. So i know what to expect, wheather its a good thing or bad thing. I need to know.


How does it feel?

:: 2004 18 May :: 6.51 pm

Wow, if only you knew how pissed i am right now. I am so heated its not even funny. My parents can burn in hell.

3 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 13 May :: 10.57 am

I'm very bored right now. I didnt feel like eating lunch today, so i'm in the library right now.

So yeah, a few weeks ago i found out that my mom is getting married and is either coming up for my sisters graduation for 1 day, or we fly down in the summer for 2 weeks. From the looks of it........she's only coming up for Kamie's graduation for 1 day. I hate it cause its only 1 fuckin day, 14 days is better than 1. But hey, nothin i can do about it now.


How does it feel?

:: 2004 8 May :: 8.14 pm
:: Mood: bored

My weekend really sucks. I havent done anything this weekend. The only thing i did was go golfing with a few guys friday, but that was it. My car broke while i was driving home friday. My brake line snapped. So yeah i could have died but its not like its a big deal or anything. So yeah i'm just sittin here being bored cause nobody is home and there is nothing to do.

I'm a loser/dork/freak.

How does it feel?

:: 2004 5 May :: 9.35 pm
:: Mood: blah

I just got home from Golf Leagues tonight. I'm happy cause i did awesome tonight! I shot a 39! But i dought any of you really understand golf, so i'll just leave it at that!

3 Felt the pain... | How does it feel?

:: 2004 2 May :: 8.58 pm
:: Mood: kinda tired

So.....yeah, interesting weekend i had.

Friday i came home and I went to Matt Brott's house later, along with Justin Langdon. Then Lindsey and Emily came over and we hung out and sat in the hot tub for a while, then they went home. Saturday.......i came home and then Matt and Justin came over to my house. We went to Woodland mall for a little bit then we went to Forest Hills for the soccer game. After that we came home and just chilled here for the night. Nate stopped over, along with Katie Schaub, Katie Lewis, Tony and Tyler from Wyoming Park. They stayed for a little bit then they left and me, matt, and justin went to bed. Sunday......we got up and went and played 18 holes of golf. I shot an 86, matt and justin both shot an 88. Then matt went home and justin came back to my house.....then i took him home.

That was my weekend. It was pretty interesting. So yeah.....

How does it feel?

:: 2004 26 April :: 8.58 pm
:: Mood: bored

Well, last night i kinda forgot to mention what happened during my weekend. I went golfing with kyle, his dad, and justin langdon. We had a blast. I kicked their ass' in golf. So then we went to justin's house to get stuff lol, then we went to kyle's house and sat by the fire. I know it kinda sounds boring but believe me it wasn't! Lets just leave it at that! Then saturday justin left and i stayed another night there. We had some people come over. His brother josh from carson city and josh's friend came over. Then we called up lisa and brittany and they came over. Then i went home sunday morning .....and yeah. Lol that indeed was my weekend.


How does it feel?

:: 2004 25 April :: 8.08 pm
:: Mood: happy

I am so happy, you have no idea!

I just got done talking to my mom (texas) on the phone. She's getting married this summer! She's known this guy forever and they hooked up like 5 months ago and they are getting married this summer! Its awesome! This guy has 3 daughters, one is 14, one is 17, and one is 18. That just made my weekend!

I just felt the need to share with ya'll!


2 Felt the pain... | How does it feel? | Random Journal