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sandatthebeach (profile) wrote,
on 10-16-2004 at 9:11pm
Current mood: tired
Subject: Os ju sti medi ta bitur
Dudes. I did it. I made IMEA. I freakin' made IMEA. I was not expecting that. And I'm so happy.


I actually cried because I was so happy and shocked and excited and ahhh! Ask anyone in choir. I was was kinda pathetic actually not that I think about it.

It was really bad this week because I was so doubtful of myself and I just didn't think that I would be good enough or I would majorly screw up....and I did....but I guess it wasn't as horrific as I thought. I gave myself such a hard time. And I was so pissed that night too.....I walked out of the room so mad at myself. Even the following morning, people asked about it and I refused to answer....I didn't want to think about it. And then OC said my name I was just in complete shock. ::Sigh:: I'm happy.

It kinda pissed me off when Kurt announced me being in District choir everytime he freakin saw me that day. I was finally like Kurt shut up. I'm not someone who takes compliments very well...and I don't revolve my life around them. Compliments make me uncomfortable. I often take them for sarcasm...that's how weird I am. Just, you guys, I don't want to be self-centered...and I'm not (or at least I don't think I am....PLEASE inform me if I am....I don't want to turn into one of those people) and I don't people to encourage that I guess....I don't know...I'm not sure what I want to say anymore. Blah.

Ok I'm off.

Always, Sandy
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10-22-04 9:34am

It・s weird; our society lives on such a pessimistic attitude that when one is given a compliment, eye contact is rare and sincerity is doubted. It・s not just you.

In gym we were put in groups of four by number, so we didn・t know anyone. He told us to discuss amongst ourselves to get to know each other better. Then we had to give a compliment to someone else in the group. Everyone got one, even though we only knew basic stuff or about them from class. He walked around and pointed out that some people couldn・t make eye contact when giving the compliment, and others when receiving the compliment. We grow up having people criticize and tell us we・re wrong, so when we do something right, you don・t need to defend it and don・t know what to do.

Just a comment. Good job, btw. You・re awesome, Sandy Kim. Your reflection shows who you are inside. ::hug:: bye!

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Re:, 11-02-04 9:01am

i agree with the compliment thing also, i get that way too but i think thats because so many times i thoguth people were giving me compliments and they really werent...ahh bad childhood flashbacks!!!

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