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goodbye

:: 2017 29 December :: 9.35am

Idgaf mothafucka.

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goodbye

:: 2017 24 December :: 5.22pm

I am tired of being made to feel bad about every little fucking miscommunication. I don't deserve that. I'm a good person.

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goodbye

:: 2017 20 December :: 10.01pm

I am the mountain and you are the rain and clouds over me that will pass. I will remain strong.

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goodbye

:: 2017 20 December :: 12.44am

I don't need to be anything more than what I already am ♥

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goodbye

:: 2017 15 December :: 10.00am

I saw Star Wars last night. There are sooo many things I want to say but no one to talk to about it.

Without ruining it I'll say I enjoyed Adam Driver's acting most of all.

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goodbye

:: 2017 24 November :: 5.26pm

I had a beautiful day with a beautiful friend, teacher, and mentor. It's been pretty shitty since I got here, but mostly that was fabricated in my head. I love my family and friends. I love that I can count on them for support.

I never needed to come home. I just thought I wanted to. I think I'll do fine here... I just have to change my mindset from feeling like a teenager in my parents' place to feeling like an adult who is still in charge of her own destiny.

There was nothing causing this to happen. I didn't fall on hard times. I was never forced to do anything. I could have stayed there far longer. I could have probably got on the management track. But honestly, I think regrouping and deciding on a different course, one I will enjoy more, is going to be far better for me in the long-run.

There was no doubt, but just to reiterate, I'll be okay.

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goodbye

:: 2017 16 November :: 9.02pm

I do feel like I've accomplished alot there. I showed that I can swim when the tide gets rough.

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goodbye

:: 2017 11 November :: 11.57am
:: Mood: defeated

Same as it ever was.

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poisonedheart

:: 2017 1 November :: 10.47pm

I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who knows me
I'm mean and bitter
And a failure at everything that I say I believe

I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who loves me
I never write, I never call
I never think about anyone at all

I'm not a good person
No matter what I do
My exhaustion will consume me
And I'm too tired for the truth

I'm not a good person
I'm sure you're not surprised
It must be pouring out my sweat glands
It must be someplace in my eyes

I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway

I don't know why I am this way
I'm not a good person, not even to you
I'm staying home because I can't stand the sound
Of another heartbeat in the room

I'm not a good person
Fuck it, you know it's true
I'm lazy, I'm a coward
I'm asleep all day in my room

I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway

I don't know why I am this way

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goodbye

:: 2017 29 October :: 1.00pm

The rest of my life is a blank slate... and I'm not sure what to fill it in with.

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