Like a fish dangling from a hook;helpless she clung to his side.

Like a fish dangling from a hook;helpless she clung to his side.

:: 2006 6 August :: 8.38 pm

Anatomy

Your lungs took stale air and breathed. They didn't dry up. Breathe.

Your tongue got twisted. It didn't tangle. Twist.

Your brain became locked. Not ignorant. Lock.

Your legs aren't broken. They're tired of walking. Broke.

Your arms gave into the pressure. They didn't crumble. Press.

Your eyes closed. They are not blind. Close.

Your ears stopped working. They didn't become deaf. Work.

Your lips became frozen. They still felt the feeling. Froze.

Your hands cracked. They still knew pain. Crack.

Your feet used to be balanced. They are now on a beam. Balance.

Your heart stopped. It didn't break. Stop.

You stopped. Start.

6 Lost | Searching

:: 2006 31 May :: 3.33 pm

Free.
The rain slides down the roof top, hitting the concrete.
The boy lies there, only half covered, shivering from the bitter breeze.
She notices and lies next to him, tickles his arm, he half wakes up and pulls her close. The bodies become one as every inch of space is lost.
The lightning grows brighter, the thunder pounds harder, and the rain floods the room. Winds pick up and tear the picture frames from every wall. Windows shatter, sending little shards of glass swirling throughout the room. The girl lies there, smiling. The boy lies there, staring into her luring green eyes. Their lips meet as their eyes close. When their lips part and eyes open there's only darkness and the sound of their heart beats racing eachothers is all they can hear. They grab eachothers hands as they simultaneously lift their bodies from the bed due to some uncontrollable force. Not a God, but their relentless love. Their feet feel the cold patio, soaked in rain, then all solid ground disintegrates. They're soaring through the air, headed straight into the concrete beneathe them. The boy whispers into the girls ear, as her long auburn hair whips his face.
"You're all that will ever live in me."
"I'm alive no matter what." she whispers back.
Their bodies hit the concrete, they turn into dust, and drift away though the cold night sky. They're finally free, together. They are rain drops, sliding down roof tops.

6 Lost | Searching

:: 2006 11 January :: 9.54 pm

Red Ceiling.
[TO READ THIS JUST GO TO LEAVE A COMMENT, SO THE STUPID SIGNS AREN'T IN IT]

I lie there, with the cold bars cutting into my rib cage and the cool, blue light turning the ceiling into a clear, night sky. The clock keeps blinking red, telling me it's time to leave. But, my heart keeps saying no. While my mind is telling me go.
I just don't know.
The soft sheets, they're pulling me in. And the radio keeps getting louder and I can't even hear enough to understand that this life is not who I am.
This life is not what I planned.
But, it's all a cycle of the good and the bad.
It's all a transformation of the happy and the sad.
And I just don't care.
It's just not me.
They keep screaming, "You have to be strong, just hold on."
While, my fingers...they're breaking. My arms... they're still aching.
My lungs, they're gasping, while my heart it's grasping
the thought of falling into endless chambers.
Like intense dark eyes, that just don't seem to end.
While I read these books, I learn death is just a mystery; an internal nothing.
And I don't want to go where I won't know I am.
For this life, it's mine, and I'm just choking on it.
And I've made it what it is.
It's not that great, but for once it's not his.
But, sometimes I fucking wish it wasn't mine.
Let's bitch and moan while the survivors struggle and the dead ones rot.
We've all got something to whine about.
So, let's write words to get peoples attention.
And let's be whores for a touch of affection.
Let's just end this charade, just throw another parade.
For people who don't exist, not the people who died on that list.
The lost names that no one cares to hear.
Not even me. 'Cause it's all too sad, and torture is in the air.
Let's just wash it away like all of our fears.
Because, our shells...they crack. But, we're not weak.
We're just too selfish to fucking speak.

2 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 12 December :: 4.59 pm

When you're in darkness don't forget what you saw in the light.

Searching

:: 2005 31 October :: 6.01 pm

It is safe to say I have not been in love yet or have been loved yet.
Love doesn't just stop and go away. Love doesn't just fade.
I'm taking my time this time.
I promise you that.
No more mistakes.
But, I love you. Don't you see?
I do, baby I need you. I want you.
No, I don't.
You're not my air, you never were.
It's not going down like last time, hun.
I'm not crawling back.
I've made my mistakes and I can't say that I've learned, but what I can say is that I will.
Just friends right? Let's just wear our plastic smiles and our glazed up eyes and be just friends.
Isn't that how it works?
You just pretend. It's all an act and we're the lead roles.
So what's the next act? Do I fall in love or out of love?
Do you kiss me or fuck me?
Do you realize you've taken me for granted or use me some more?
What's the next line, darling?
Is it that rehearsed? You should have it memorized by now!
It's only a few lines. 1 2 3.
What's wrong with you?
I know, I know.. they were different and so am I.
We were really in love, right?
You were just confused.
Well read the lines, baby. They're always right.
There's no missprints in a famous script.
Black ink and heavy paper, they couldn't afford a mistake.
Everyone would get it wrong!
No one would understand!
Mindless zombies gliding along the stage.
We need a good show. The best!
And it's only going to be the best if it ends happy.
No one wants to see something sad with their own eyes.
Let's just make a rewrite!
I die in the end and you live.
Isn't that how it always ends anyway?
One loser and a winner?
Someone has to lose, die, fade, cry.
So who's it gonna be?
Who hit the lines just right?
Who faked the emotion to perfection?
Who really hit em hard?
You. It's all you, baby.
---------------------------------------------
Ok, it sucks. Buuuttt.. I'm writing again! Do you know what this means?

Everything's wrong.

11 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 27 July :: 10.20 am
:: Music: Fleetwood Mac - Go Insane

Nothing.
She visits the kitchen to feed her hunger, yet she leaves empty with her stomach growling.
She enters the bedroom to rest, once she had slept she felt tired and weak.
She wanders into the living room to escape reality, she observes it.
She goes into the bathroom to cleanse, she leaves dirtier than when she entered.

This time a man follows her.

She visits the kitchen to feed her hunger, she leaves drunk.
She enters the bedroom to sleep, she leaves tainted and fucked.
She wanders into the living room to escape reality, she cries.
She goes into the bathroom to cleanse, she's naked.

Naked of all feelings, thoughts, judgement.
Exposed.

She swallows the pills to die, she lives.
Nothing ever follows any plans. Nothing matters.
And that's all she was .. nothing.

10 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 10 June :: 11.33 am

Marla Monologue
This is the monologue I wrote speaking from Marla's point of view for Drama and reveived the Most Unique Character award on. I finally decided to post it because I post all my writings here.

---------------------------------------------------

So, I met this guy. He told me, "You're a faker. You're not dying."
My first thought was, 'Hah..we're all dying.'
Life to me is one.big.joke.
We're all just sliding by. One big, damned blur.
Death didn't scare me. I'd find myself wandering into traffic. In fact, death intrigued me if anything. I was waiting for that moment I could smell my death. One minute we're here, the next we're not. It was that simple for me. Everyone thinks too much. So I didn't.
I didn't care enough to protect myself. That's where he came in. He was so scared of me, his paranoia only subsided when he could watch my every move; too afraid I'd be in my room swallowing any pills, smoking any drugs, drinking any liquid to get me lost or cause my death. I was a basket case of emotions, but he was too...predictable. He needed what I needed just as bad; someone..anyone to talk to. No one felt alive on their own. We're all too dependent. So I learned to stand on my own two feet. Though he'd catch me from time to time, only to set me up for another fall.
It was all empty.
Empty medicine.
Empty words.
Empty actions.
Empty ... me.
One day he loved me, the next he'd tell me to get lost. So I would.
He wanted to expose me so badly. But, I could expose him. So we thrived on fear.
My lies. My fake diseases.
His fake diseases. His lies.
He was a spitting image of my twisted insides.
So, at my breaking points I'd give him a call and he'd cure me. It was kind've sick in a way.
So close, yet so distant.
Every action so s..l..o..w, yet so fast.
I loved him.
I hated him.
He made me cry.
He made me laugh.
He made me alive.
He made me die.
He doesn't even exist.

"He" is me.

1 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 21 May :: 12.05 pm

Pearing through these empty eyes the colors seem to blend.
I stare and stare until you're black and blue yet the transparency never ends.
I see dim lights, and dimmer ones ahead.
I reach to blow out the candle, which rests near your bed.
My lungs are poisioned with the disarray of diease.
"All I ask is that you fill these shattered eyes with some color. Please!"
"Being born with eyes to see has done nothing but display,
the false shells surrounding every organism which rests down to lay."
"I'm asking, no pleading won't you help me?
I only want to see!"
The beautiful infinity which is hidden in the light.
I want something to settle in my mind that's a miracle sight.
Finally I open my eyes and the color starts to appear,
flooding every object, now I feel fear.
The people, they are all seperated yet basically the same.
The one which gave me sight is who I'm going to blame.
"You told me you wanted to see now I have to take it away?"
You're asking too much out of me, this is how you shall stay."
"Oh, please sir give me one last chance,
one more gorgeous dark dance
with the girl who was pretty until my eyes awoke."
"No, my child I can't give you that, you treat me like a joke.
I knew what I was doing, but you questioned me.
Now is how you will live for all of eternity."

1 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 5 April :: 12.29 pm
:: Music: Brand New

Blur.
It's those nights you feel infinite. When the highway blurs and you don't even know how fast you're going. You just know it's fast. The music filling the car so strongly you swear if you move you'll suffocate. Masking everyones voice that they don't want heard until you hit a bump. Revealing every glitch in every voice all at once. Singing quieter until you're sure that the CD won't skip, you regain your hidden confidence until the next bump.
It's those nights you feel infinite.

2 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 5 April :: 11.43 am
:: Music: At the Drive-In

This obviously has nothing to do with me. Just a story I thought several people I saw last night may have.

I didn't wear this skirt to be impressive, hun. I've been wearing it since last Tuesday. A girl walked up to me and said, "I like your hair." I wrapped my fingers around a strand, "Thanks. I haven't touched it in three days." Disgusted she walked away. My back hurts from familar couches in strangers homes. That filmy, beer stain layered with nicotine coats my teeth. My lips, cracked and bleeding.
I have a home, but no money.
I have eyes that don't see.
A color tv.
But, color-blind.
You always get the shit end of the stick.
At least it's warm.
"You haven't been fucked over yet."

Searching

:: 2005 5 April :: 11.30 am

The way.
This is just something I wrote. Some of it has to do with me, but most of it does not.

It's the way he looks down at me, pressing his hips into mine.
It's the way those eyes seem to stare straight into mine.
It's the way that golden brown hair lies over his forehead, curling at the ends.
It's the way he holds me so strongly, making me pray to God that it never ends.
It's the way he kisses my ear, and whispers, "I love you."
It's the way he says, "I only want you."

Too bad he's done it all before.
I heard her eyes were brown.
And her lips were pink.
Her hair, blonde.

He's done it all before.
Just my luck.
Just my fucking luck.

There I found him, at the end of the bed. Head in his hand, a beer in the other. I Yelled, "Don't stain the sheets, darling. They're not new, but I washed em!"
He lifted his head and glared at me with his eyes flooded in tears.
"Every fuck we ever had lie on these sheets. I didn't buy them white to be classy. They won't be washed for months again."
He tipped the beer, soaking the bed.
He smiled.
I smiled.

Searching

:: 2005 3 April :: 1.07 pm

The tears were warm, only cold when she blinked. Her face flooded as she dug her nails into her bedsheets, staring straight up to her ceiling. She couldn't see it, but knew it was there from the days the morning light lit the walls. And the fact that she couldn't see the stars confirmed her ceiling hadn't floated away like she had dreamed. She stood up feeling the coldness freeze her naked body. Crawling back into bed she felt her past body heat lie on the blankets. It was almost a comforting feeling, til she understood it was her heat and not his. She cried. Soon her and the room she was contained in fell silent. Motionless she lie under her sheets. Her body began to shake. Warm tears streamed down her pale cheeks to her neck. She wasn't even sure why she was crying. Usually she had an idea, but this time she was almost clueless. Actually, she wasn't. She knew. She missed. She missed a lot of things. Him, life. She missed what she wanted. And that was her own life.

[Just an idea, I may finish it later]

1 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 12 March :: 2.59 pm

Irony.
Peering out the window, I felt content. The vehicle stopped on the corner and I stared into the sky. As the rain fell down I followed the drops with my eyes to the puddle; reflecting the stop light, which created a soft, red glow on my face. It stood so still, only moving with each drop that sank into it. "Like puddles, in the rain. Like puddles, we wash away." entered my ears, from my CD player. I smiled as we turned the corner.

4 Lost | Searching

:: 2005 14 January :: 4.53 pm

I will no longer be updating this. I realized these writings are terrible and childish. So until I improve my writing style or in other words, completely change it, this journal is not going to be updated.

:: 2005 12 January :: 7.30 pm

When you catch me I sigh.
When you tell me to relax, I lay like I'm dying.
When you tell me to reach, I stare as I'm falling.

You broke the fall that was meant to break me.
You healed the scar that was meant for only you to see.
I am always there at the wrong time.
I am the one who always has to climb..
from the hole I threw myself so deep into.
Once I climb out all I see is you.
Once I take a step, I feel so weak.
Once so strong, now my bones are antique.
Your words leave tears in my pale skin.
Your eyes leave my face feeling thin.
My hands grow cold.
My heart has been sold..
to the night sky.
To the last bird who flies.
To the man who drinks to the last drop.
To the women who only begs for him to stop.
To all but my lungs.
To the last word to leave my tongue.

When you tell me to relax, I lay like I'm dying.
When you tell me to reach, I stare as I'm falling.

2 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 27 December :: 8.47 am
:: Music: Bright Eyes - I Woke Up With This Song In My Head This Morning

That spot on the floor that you step over every day is where we stood when we held hands, while the buildings crumbled. You looked at me with your big, bright eyes. They reflected every fear you ever felt. Every tear you ever cried. Everything you ever saw. Then you glanced back, seeing the last building fall. I whispered in your ear, "Everything's changing." You just stared straight ahead, motionless. The sun had gone down, there was nothing visible, but shadows. We walked outside. Silence. Not a bird singing. Not a car driving. It almost hurt my ears.
You said, "Where are we?"
I answered, "I don't know."
"So.. we're lost.."
"No. We're finally found."
You smiled. Then asked, "Are we the only ones left?"
"Yeah."
"So we're..alone."
"I've never felt less alone."
I put my hands on your neck. You held my wrists. We kissed in the shadows for the last time.

1 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 18 December :: 12.45 pm
:: Music: The Used - All That I've Got

It's only a reply.
I hate, and I wait, for the day, or the way, you look at me, the way you wish to see, I can only plea, for the nights, not the fights, I bite, my tongue, for you, you do too, when will it end? It's all in the message you send, I mean no harm, I'll throw in my charm, to show I care, I can't help but stare, this I cannot bare, I wear, a smile, constantly, I can only fake it for a while, it's eating me, why can't you see? I am as dead as you allow me to be, I read the books, I see the looks, I hear the songs, I write all my wrongs, a list, you get the jist, it doesn't do a thing, the salt only stings, my eyes, I hear your sighs, I wish to be by your side, but instead I hide, if you were here, I'd catch every tear, I'm sorry, please don't worry, this is only a reply, I wish to ask why, you feel the way, you always seem to stay, happiness never comes, hate in its constant rhythms, I don't need fancy words, everything you read is absurd, a touch, would mean so much, I don't know what to do, it's all a constant cue, who's next? I swear I'm hexed, of thoughts, random inkblots, it's such a blur, the words only slur, on the tip of my tongue, you knew I always clung, to you, I didn't know what else I could do, don't leave me, all alone, I will let you be, don't disown, what we are, we got too far, to give in now, let's take this vow.

:: 2004 17 December :: 1.22 am

Awake
All I could feel was my body tightening.
Tightening. Tightening.
My eyes, drowned.
My voice, choked up.
My heart, beating out of my chest.
I swore it was all too much to take.
I've never felt like I needed to see someone so bad.
This bad.
I'd fall apart in your arms.
I've never felt so helpless.
So powerless.
It was like I threw my life for the taking.
Put my name on the ground.
I fucking swear there wasn't a sound.
Gasping for air.
For you.
"Don't."
"Don't you dare."
Echoed in my ears.
I was breaking.
Falling apart, inch by inch.
Would you catch my heart?
Or pick up the pieces?
As long as you fixed it I guess.
Darling, keep your chin up.
And I'll look past your face,
to see the fights.
I'll lie awake
and think of you,
all these lonely nights.

3 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 13 December :: 10.38 pm

And we danced.
It's the sensation of dancing with death. But you're not sure because you don't know what death feels like.
It's the feeling of flying that you can only imagine, because you'll never get your chance. A child hood memory; realized impossible.
The feeling of, "If looks could kill" he'd be dead right now; dissapointment. Knowing nothing's that easy.
The feeling of your first kiss. So built up, if only it felt as good as the last.
Your feeling of knowing everything, but in the back of your mind you know there's one more thing you could learn.
Your feeling of screaming, but when you finally did no one heard it.
All the times you cried, and all the times you lied about it.
The times you laughed, and all the times you wish you had.
The regret that solves nothing, and only brings on a headache.
The wishes you make, and how stupid they are.
Count the number of times you desired your death
and how many of those requests you were glad not to be taken.

3 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 12 December :: 9.35 am
:: Music: Keane - We Might as Well Be Strangers

Run
I abhor the realization of your existence.
If only I had never met you.
If only I had never let you
venerate me, the way you dared.

I loathe that I comprehend your presence.
If only you had never met me.
If only you had never let me
infatuate you, the way I did.

Fabrication.
Indecent.
Putrid.
Remorse.
Wretched.
Concealed.

Everything is over, so sweetie move on.
Get over it doll.
Darling, let it all go.

Making things worse will only make you toss and turn.
You're too selfish to stop if you're getting the satisfaction you yearn.

We're all waiting for the day you mature.
What will it take? We're so unsure.

Well, as long as you're having a good time.
People like you sell out in dozens for a dime.

4 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 11 December :: 9.00 pm

A stupid school poem I had to write. (Putting it in here to print out and turn in Monday since we can't fucking use hotmail). I had to write about my room, pretending it was alive. Lame, eh?

You spend the day asleep, and closed up.
Even though the light shines in.
Cold, distracting, alive.
You sigh in the night.
They tell me you sing loud songs,
I trust them because I hear it creep under your door.
And they tell me you tell stories,
I know this because I've read the words.
And they tell me you're cold as ice,
I know this because I've felt it as I've entered.
Your walls, painted over dozens of times.
Your favorite color's changed throughout the years.
Pink to black.
White to red.
The ground; your feet, has always stayed ocean blue.
You're small, and contained.
Making the memories clutter up your shelves.
You house an innocent victim.
Built strong on every side.
Protecting, and consoling.
Keeping her secrets locked in the plaster.
Stains and broken drawers serve as reminders
of better times.
Worn out, and old.
You're still alive, and loved.
Being so used only proves your strength.

8 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 7 December :: 3.33 pm
:: Music: Straylight Run - The Perfect Ending

She sets her books down on the counter, and sees a beer can. Obviously placed by her low life alcoholic father. She all ready knows what this entire night is going to lead to. She sits at her desk with her headphones on trying to block out the screaming. Every day it's the same thing. She could tell you minute to minute what will happen. She's lived it all before, too many times. Her bottom lip becomes numb caused by biting on it to keep from breaking down in tears. It seems that no matter how loud her music is she can hear every word. The violence over powers it. Her ears start to hurt, and her head starts to pound. It's bullshit. 'How can someone be with someone for 19 years, and be married for 7 years and live like this?' she thinks to herself. How can that be love? If you love someone you don't treat them like this. There's no fucking excuse for it. Her mother doesn't deserve this..she's fucked up because of it.

So am I.

3 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 6 December :: 10.45 pm

They opened their doors to the cold car, and sat down. Not a word was said on the way home. The silence wasn't unfamilar, but for the first time it was awkward. She stared out the window, resting her hand open on her leg. He just stared straight ahead at the icy road. She waited for him to hold her hand, but realized the wait was only killing her. She wrapped her fingers up, and slipped them inside her coat. She hated it. He always held her hand. Once they got to her house they both sat on the couch. He shifted his body away from her, and she buried her head into her knees.

She was weak. And so was he.

She hated being so vunerable. So weak. Giving in so easily. But she did anyway.

(I'm going to finish this later, maybe make somewhat of a short story.. who knows.)

6 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 6 December :: 10.27 pm

I knew a boy with cuts on his wrists, I think he hated how everything is.

:: 2004 6 December :: 10.20 pm

You could have.
The silence was so strong you could have shattered it with a whisper.
But you wouldn't. And you didn't.
The tension was so alive you could've kissed it with your lips.
But you wouldn't. And you didn't.
The sadness was so weak you could have crushed it with your hands.
But you wouldn't. And you didn't.

2 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 25 November :: 6.45 pm

She knew.
As she sat in the car, she felt alone;distant.
She stared out the window at the snow, which she wished could all melt away to show the grass she never noticed until covered.
She was miserable knowing she had to spend the day with her family. Her family wasn't terrible, she just didn't like spending time with irritating people.
She ignored the constant, dull conversation in the car. Once she felt the warmth of his arm around her everything seemed all right. Like a fish dangling from a hook;helpless she clung to his side. He kept talking, as her emotions seemed to stir inside herself, barely breathing she laid her head on his shoulder.
She had a pounding headache, a stomach ache, and body pains keeping her down. She would die to hear him say, "Honey" or "Baby." Which any other time would seem corny, but when he said it.. that was the last thing on her mind. She could stare into those eyes for a life time. Everything was different with him.
She'd die for waking him up in the mornings. Kissing his structured face until he woke up.
After thinking about him so much, she only wished to stop. He loved her more than life itself. She knew because he told her. And he showed it, with his kisses and his eyes.
He could read her like a book. She knew it, because he told her.
"You're beautiful."
She knew she was. Because he told her.
And his words.. well, she'd die for them.

Searching

:: 2004 27 June :: 1.28 pm
:: Music: Jamison Parker - Home

What if everytime I said "him" I was implying the fact that you knew I was talking about a girl. And every time I said "her" I figured you knew it was a man? When I was sad, I would laugh and when I was laughing I was angry. When I was happy I would frown, and when I frowned I was angry. When I was hot I'd shiver, and when I was sleepy I'd wake up. I wouldn't eat unless I was full, and if I wanted to speak I'd write.

What if every time I wrote, I wrote like that?

Searching

:: 2004 6 June :: 4.03 pm

My inspiration: Don't do anything I wouldn't do, even if you don't know what I wouldn't do, because I can tell you now.

I'd do anything.

You say you know me. Did you know my strength? I don't mean the little things, I don't mean the muscles. What do I mean? The words, the thoughts. I have the power to make someone sad, happy, excited. I have the power to change someone. I can lie, and you will believe me. I have the right to lie. I have the right to be honest. I can put a smile on your face and in a split second make it dissapear. Reading my words, you'll never know me. Does anyone really know anyone? I would like to think so, but that would only be another lie. Another secret whispered, "I'll never tell, you can trust me." Trust no one. If I could give everyone one message that would be it. Don't let anyone in, until you are ready to die for them. Because in the end something's going to die. Fade. It will be gone. Whatever you had isn't going to last forever. 'Live life like it's the last day' everyone says. For once listen to your own words. Quit throwing out shit you are guilty of not possessing. Be yourself. 'Cause I can't be you. Teach yourself. 'Cause I can't teach you. Tell that person how you feel, not being afraid of what they say. Say what you want before wondering if you'd sound stupid. Laugh. Cry. Open yourself up to the people who care. Don't hide. Being lost gets you no where. No one is alone. You always have yourself. I'd like to think that's enough, at many times, way too much. Don't be afraid to fall in love. More importantly, don't be afraid to fall out of it. Lose touch, but don't lose memories. Forgive. Everyone has regrets. Let them rest for one day. Let them know it's ok. Give them closure, because leaving someone with nothing is the worst thing you can do. Let go of your hate. It's not worth it. I can tell you, it's not worth it. It eats at you, poisons you. In your happiest moments, it will be there. Do you know what I'm going to do? I could do anything. Guess. Guessing will get you no where. When you're sleeping, dream. But don't let that be an escape. Dreams are nothing. After all everyone has to wake up. Break some rules, take some chances, be a kid. Don't grow up. How dull. Paint every room your favorite color. Smile when someone cries. Laugh when you're angry. Let it go. Let it all go.

4 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 15 May :: 3.29 pm

This is all i got, good enough for now.
That's why we all keep breathing; to reach the moment in our life when everything is right.

3 Lost | Searching

:: 2004 28 April :: 9.28 pm

An intoxicating drink. You hate the taste, but keep drinking just to get the feeling. One sip, and you're hooked.

A mans heart; a stranger to his own body. His lungs breathe in air, poisoned with a cigarette. His smile drips of beer as her lips taste of liquor.

Her hair falls into her face as his hand, burnt from a joint, cures the shadow of her eye lashes. She coughs. He breathes in, throats dry. Tounges touch. She cries.

She's a lush and he's a lavish.

3 Lost | Searching