Wise men say, only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you..

 

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sameen

:: 2004 13 August :: 8.25pm
:: Mood: full
:: Music: salt shaker

just had dinner- i'm stuffed, that's for sure.

well week no. 1 is over. not that it was such an event-making week, but yeah. i'm glad it's the weekend tho. i was excited 2 c everyone, but i didn't even get 2 c that many ppl. this year, ppl who i have classes wit- they're in a lot of my classes, as opposed 2 last year when it was more spread out and i saw more ppl. i guess in a way it's good cuz i'll get close wit those ppl, but i was close wit those ppl neway. the classes all seem like they're gonna be hard. maybe not necessarily HARD, but if u want an a, then u're gonna have 2 work for them. not like alg 2 last year, when u get pay attention 4 the review she did right b4 the test [which, in mind, was exactly LIKE the test] and get by. or morone helpin us out in english. shit, and we'll actually have an accomplished social studies teacher. i always take a long time adjusting. strangely, i always do better second semester. so in a nutshell:

strategies 4 college success:
wudn't know cuz i haven't had the class yet, but shiit, 6 classes r enough- thank u. best part is gettin up late, stretchin my arm, and bein like hahaha i SHUD be in school now.. but i'm NOT!

english:
the lady seems nice, but as everyone has said, boring. but she seems like she knows what she's doing and she'll get us to ap, which is what matters i guess. i dunno, i've always liked english. and sometimes it comes naturally 2 me, but sometimes i get TOO laid back, and that's when i get screwed. but i mean, why is it SO important neway. i don't get it. i mean, i get y math is, but i mean.. unless if u wanna be a journalist or something, i dunno y there's such an obsession wit it. science seems much more imp. sorry goin on a tangent. but i like the class cuz there's liz, rachel, lawrence, sunil, and anand in it. it's one of the classes where it's definitely mixed wit the nerdy ppl and the.. not ? i duno.. i'll let u decide which category i fall under.

us history:
yeah he's already called me the "mistake by the lake" lol and the whole class laughed at me : / it's my parents fault we lived in cleveland.. ok... newayy it's already managed 2 bore me and i alreayd feel overwhelmed. i'll take the blame 4 it, it was probably my fault, cuz i didn't follow through wit the readin assignment, so i was kinda lost in class 1/2 the time, but still- how does he expect us 2 get all that reading done?!?! even peter fell asleep and that says something...

chem:
i'm glad 2 back wit ms swanson [yes i still feel partially guilty 4 giving up ap chem- just 4 that strategies 4 college success class, which bein in ib is practically preparin u 4 college, but still..yeah... but i'm kinda glad i did, cuz i dunno if i wud be able 2 handle it wit ap bio. i duno if i shuda just sticked wit ap chem and social anth. o well, guess we'll never know... but the environment was already laid back and relaxed [besides that test..] and since it's not ap, i can tell we're gonna have time 2 just do nonsense and crap. good times. small class tho. ms swanson is really nice tho...

spanish:
see, i like mrs halcomb herself. she's a very nice, lively lady. u don't ever feel really bored in her class or nething. it's just the gradin itself is hard/strict. but i mean, it's gonna be like the ap. so yeah. i like her tho. and everyone is in that class, so it shudn't be like last year. and it's mostly ppl from our grade, actually, which is also nice.

bio:
well not much 2 say since he's not there. but i really hope he has changed his teaching style. i HATE bein the ones to be experimented on, especially on this class. last year, gov.. whatever, don't care about that class, but i mean, bio actually counts.. we'll see, had fun in there, yeah- not much work accomplished tho. i mean, mr morone, himself, is a great guy, but anyone who had bio wit him freshman year can explain what im tryin 2 say..

pre cal:
i feel dumb already. how is that possibly, i already feel lost in math. and it's not even ap calculus or nething. i just need 2 review and look at the book and not expect everything 2 come 2 me naturally. i mean, i guess that's y we're IN school. but i mean, i think i can get an a in there. mr power is nice. like the bloke [i wish i had a british accent]

so that was this week, in a nutshell. what can i say. not much else i guess. i hope this weekend is accomplished, but fun.

3 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 12 August :: 6.34pm
:: Mood: smiley
:: Music: I Want it That Way-BSB

lol..amy and her old skoo songs..
the bus was really funny today..we listened to old music..thot bout the old days..i miss being little..no drama back then..stratch that..yea there was..but none i had to deal with..lol..newayysss..second day of skoolio!!
i'm beginning to love it..:D

u.s history: there's alotta people in that class..i can already tell itz gonna be boring as hell but i got my amycita right next to me to keep me company!!..:)..and both ashley's are in there with me too..and caitlin and a bunch of other people..so its all good

trig: wow..what a class!! that's gonna be fun..everyyybodyyy is in there..cept my amara!!..:(..i think its gonna be a fun class..all my buddies are in there..lots of socializing..dr. baum is cool too..so far..dont wanna jinx it..lol

biology: this class is pretty small..but amara's in there..so im happy..so is val and rach..and katherine too..i hope morone jr got better with his teaching skills..it seems like he's more prepared..:/..hope it turns out good..

social anth: sam's in this one too..:D..we did pretty good with classes this year..mr davis is ok..not like other ppl sed he was like..carlos and amy r in here too..

spanish: this class is gonna be really fun too..everyybodyy's in this one too..it sucks we're gonna have mrs levine as a sub for two weeks tho

driver's ed: ally's my driving buddy!!..lol..that shudd be fun..can't wait

english: schilit's on the iffy side..she calls us "chickie poo"..lol..yea..weirdd..

my luches worked out for me too..so im straight for that..hope this year is a good one!! and i hope it goes by fast..x0x0

take my hand..


sameen

:: 2004 11 August :: 6.43pm

Today was the first day of school [*take not of subject]. I mean, I guess it all right. US History has already managed to bore me, but Mr. Hall seems like a good teacher- at least he knows what he's doing. He said last year he had an 87% passing rate, that's pretty damn good. But there's a lotta people in my class, so that'll make up for it, if it does in actuality turn out to be boring. Then was Spanish. It was fun too, cuz EVERYONE is in our class. Going over the handbook was kinda boring tho. I have second lunch.. both days, I think [500's in second lunch, right?]. Mrs Halcomb is nice, but SUCH a stickler for the rules and her class itself is hard. But, I guess the way she grades is how the AP grades, so it's no good havin another teacher who lets u slide, but then u don't pass the AP. Lunch was all right. Some child thought I was a freshman- I do NOT look like a freshman. What an insult. It's switched now.. freshman year people thought I was a junior and this year people r gonna think I'm a freshman. Anyway, then was Pre Cal- it was all right. I mean, Mr Power seems nice and I don't think I'm gonna have THAT much of a hard time gettin an A, most people I know got A's last year.. It was nice goin to school late tho. I think I made a mistake by dropping AP Chem tho. I feel really.. guilty, I dunno y. I'll talk to Ms. Swanson tomorrow. Tomorrow's English, Chem, and Bio. Great, sciences BACK 2 BACK. I think odd days my worst class will be Spanish and even Biology. Well I'm off to do HOMEWORK [how dumb.. on the first day..should be used to it, after last 2 years tho.. ]

1 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 10 August :: 6.42pm
:: Mood: happy

my sammi is hereeeeeee!!!
we just finished that frickin bio packet!!..finally!!..took a lil while..but we got thru it!! thank u sammi for ur help!! wuv uuuuu!!

1 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 10 August :: 12.52pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: Lean Back (Remix)

last day of summer (it shudd be fun and exciting right??)
nope..lol..im here trying to do some of that bio stuff..not working tho..lol..listening to some music..i found my book..lol..it was in tatie's house..i took it to the pool..and it got all wet..lol..dont kno how tho..neways..i havent been reading that..oh well..sam q called me today..she said happy birthday..:)..i talked to her for a bit..now im here..bored and hungry..i think sammi's coming over to help me with the bio packet..damn i cant believe how fast summer went by..itz gone..lol..i guess im kinda looking foward to school..only for the socializing part tho..lol.. see you guys 2moro!!..x0x0

take my hand..


playmate101

:: 2004 9 August :: 11.24pm
:: Mood: groggy

i went to nikki's last night! <3
it was supposed to be a cheerleading get 2gether... however that's not how it ended up. me, chelsea, nikki & angie were the only ones from the team. then i met Sam Conn who went to WMS, and met megan kristen & katilyn. nikki's house was COMPLETELY empty cause she hadda move out the next day... well... we decided to throw a party with her dad's permission... of course he didn't care. there hadda be 200 kids there according to her dad. omg it was awesome. chelsea n i walking down the street & chelsea throwing a backhand spring while drunk lmao. then being out back n having a cart wheel contest... all three of us = chelsea, me, & lil bella all falling on our asses lol. omg we had so much fun... but then chelsea passing out on the bed & people started making out on the bed... not knowing she was already sleeping in it lmao. sucked that everyone got kicked out kinda early like around 12:30 ish cause the neighbors were threatening to call the cops. and then... Rodrigo being drunk and keith, me, and angie being hungry lol. i hadda blast. i felt bad for angie cause she didn't look like she was having fun. SET! lmao chelsea. dancing with nikki n sam was fun too. but the argument btwn katilyn and nikki was outrageous. but we went to bed around 4am and nikki's dad woke us up around 7am. damn it. we cleaned up and got donuts and then sam's bro picked up me, sam, chelsea, and kristen. i can't believe kristen doesn't remember falling off the bed when nikki pushed her off lmao. but we just hung out and ate food at sam's. then johvan and derek came over. hung out... showered... my mom picked me up around 3:30pm. chelsea, kristen, and sam were gonna go get trashed at the drive thru, and invited me... but i was supposed to go shopping at the mall... but my mother was too tired. damn it. but whatever. that ended my summer just the way i wanted it, although i feel bad considering what jonah probably thinks of me. idk why it matters, but he's always kept me outta trouble. until now... but we're even. he got messed up, so did i. ha. anyways... time for bed... night night. soooo tired. xoxo

take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 9 August :: 3.44pm
:: Mood: cracking up!!
:: Music: Should of Known Better-Monica

lmao....
well it was a nice bright sunny morning this morning..so we were gonna go to christie's pool..china wanted to go because she leaves tonight..so we got all ready..it was about 9-ish this morning..right when we went out the door..it started pouring raininggg..like pouring..lol..so chi got pissed and went outside in the backyard..so i went outside with her..then talia followed us..so the three of us were out there just messing around in the rain..lol..i felt like a little kid playing in the rain..then we started playing hand games..like numbers and all those other lil games we used to play when we were little..lol..and we were doing this while it was pouring raining..lol..it was fun..then it stopped raining and we went to the pool..we had fun over there to0..we raced each other in the pool and played water tag..then chicken..i won in chicken..that's my game right there..i always win..lol..so now im home..juss chillan..bout to jump in the shower..we just got home from the pool..talk to all u guys laterrrr..luv u..x0x0

1 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 8 August :: 8.39pm
:: Mood: ecstatic
:: Music: My Place-Nelly

my party really DID turn out to be "off tha chain"..lol
ayyy..i had such a great time at the party last nite..im soo0o0o happy all you guys were able to come..it meant alot to me that you guys celebrated my special day with meEe..:D..i hope u guys had as much fun as i did..thank you all for my gifts to0..they were greattt..im waiting on all the pictures that were taken..the picz from the digi cam came out really cute tho..but my dad took 4 rolls of film..so i wanna see those..wowww..i had soo much fun..i cant get over it..lol..we partied hard..the DJ played all my music..he did good..gotta give him props..he played baby got back..lol..that was hilarious..my mom got kinda crazy..but thatz how she always is..meli and eric were soo cute together..lol..my dad was a little on the tipsy side.,but he did good..he didnt embarrass me too much..except when he cut in on me and emir's dance..did any body catch that??..lol..sameen-my mommy thinks your a really nice guy..lol..she told me to tell u that..sammi im so happy u danced..lol..the party took a lil while to get pumped up..but after me meli and ricarda started dancing and then junito and shawn got there it started poppin off..briana-my cousin likes youuu..lol..he's a player though..lol..but yea i had soo much fun..me n meli got to dance to our song..Obsession..then we all made a big circle..and danced to all these sean paul songs..lol..and tried doin all the dances from the videos..haha..that was greatt..we did really good tho..lol..my cousins were actin a fool..they're really koo tho..WE DID THE CHA-CHA SLIDEEEE...that was hott..then the electric slide..lol..and the macarena..carlos got down to that one..my feet were killinggg me way before the night was over..so i took off my shoes..so did every1 else..lol..then when i danced salsa with junito..he wanted to lead..so i sed ok..then he frickin killed my toe..omg..lol..but we had alotta fun..i didnt get to have my own cake..:(..that was the only downside..lol..but i think there's leftovers..so i needa look for it..lol..what else??..i read the picture everyone sgined last nite..you guys all wrote really nice things..i appreciate it..i was supposed to give everyone a picture..but with all the running around i forgot..i will definately give them to you guys at school..thanks again for coming i hope you had as much fun as i did!!..love you guys!!..x0x0

4 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 6 August :: 2.41pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Dirrrrrrrrrrrrty-Christina Aguilera

my mouth is filled with peanut butter...
right now im eatin a peanut butter, banana, n marshmellow sandwich..my cousin natalia is typing this 4 me cause im eatin..lol..anyways im so hyped about my partayyyyy...when my mom gets home from work imma go get my nails did..gettin acrylics..:D..yesterday i ran into my buddy Carlos while i was gettin my locker and my schedule changed..my locker is number 136 in the 400 hall..carlos got 137..im all tha way on tha bottom..grrness..neways the whole crew is kinda near each other so thatz koo..i cuddnt get into history 6th hour..so i kept it for 1st and now i have drivers ed 6th period..not that bad..i can't wait till tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! c all u soon..much lovee!!..x0x0

take my hand..


sameen

:: 2004 6 August :: 10.45am
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: radio

I felt like I cheated u woohu readers cuz I just copied and pasted my livejournal post. I do that quite often. Sorry. So I'll write a new post. I wanna get a job. I dunno where tho. I'm really nervous about it. But I really do need 2 get one. Anyone have any ideas as to where I should get one? I was thinkin about maybe Blockbuster, Office Max, or Target. I would be happy at any of those places. I wanted to be Pharamaceudical Technician before, but u have to be 18 2 b one, I guess cuz of legal reasons... Anyway, main point- I need to get a job. I'll only work 1/2 times a week tho, cuz of school. Cuz school ITSELF is gonna be hard enough 2 manage. Then Key Club. All that kinda stuff.

All the excitement of driving has kinda died down. I dunno.. it's not as great as I thought it was before I was gonna get it and a few weeks after I get it. Prob cuz I don't actually have my own car. Just a license. And, wit my parents, it's not like I could always be out, just cuz I wanted to... I think most parents r like that lol.

kailannie's party is tomorrow. i have 2 get a haircut and a shirt. i hope i get 2 c a lotta ppl who i haven't gotten 2 c 4 a while.

well that's about it 4 now...

2 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


sameen

:: 2004 6 August :: 1.31am

Heyy... it's been a long time. I missed home. I got back yesterday. The flight while comin here wasn't as bad as it was while going there. U know how it seems longer GOING someplace compared to COMING from someplace? I dunno. And the layovers at the airports weren't as bad. When we were leavin Dhaka, one of our suitcases was too heavy. It was 42 kilo's [I dunno what the conversion to lbs is..] and the limit is 32. Even tho some of our suitcases were 36/37.. he [the person that was checking us in] let that slide, but not wit the 42. So we had to take things out and stuff it into our handbags and we opened another suitcase and stuffed things into that. And it was really full. And sure enough, the chain broke, so there were clothes and stuff coming out of it when we arrived in Miami. I don't like British people. The people at Virgin Atlantic were rude to us both ways. I don't think people out of the U.S. can stand Americans. But I mean, me and my family aren't really American.. well technically me and my sister r- but u know what I mean.. right? Anyway, it was sad leaving everyone. My aunt actually went to Bangkok that day. So she left before us. But I think my grandparents and aunt will come this winter of early 2005. And possibly my other aunt if she can save enough money. I know my mom really misses my grandparents cuz when she was young she never got 2 spend time wit them. I mean, my mom got married when she was our age. I couldn't ever think of that happenin 2 me at this age. I dunno... these Eastern societies just work so weird. Besides things like that always happening, it's just SO depressing going to the east. There is such poverty and SUCH a difference between the upper class and lower class. There's hardly any middle class. I mean... I just can't describe it. It's a COMPLETELY different world there. Everything.. I mean EVERYTHING there is ENTIRELY different. For people who aren't used to it- it would definitely come as a culture shock. I mean, there were floods with the dirtiest water- some of it even blue from toxins and stuff and ppl were bathing in it and washing their utensils in it. But.. it's not like they have any other choice. And the way the servants r treated... it's awful. My aunt's servant stays overnight 6 days a week JUST so she can give her child lunch. I mean, things like this that we never even have to THINK about. That never even crosses our mind as a possible situation. And it's like.. what did we do to be born into the lives we were. That could have just as easily been us. I mean.. we didn't do anything for God to put us into the lives He did. Nothing special. Nothing out of the ordinary... So in a way it makes u aprreciate things, in America. It's such a powerful country and all the other country's r really dependent on our country. The news always talks about the upcoming election [everyone HATES Bush]. Tv there sucks. Everything is so old. It's like stuff from 2000 and 2001?? And on-line is slow and u have a limited amount of time. Like 1000 mins each month. I don't think I could stand that. And obviously things there r hard to find there. Just all these little things we take for granted. Like shampoo, soap, our snacks, etc. Sorry.. I'm ranting and raving about that. But all in all, it was a good trip in the sense that I got to spend time wit all my family and see my aunt who I haven't seen in 11 years. I got close with everyone, which is the reason why I went..

Anyway, it's nice to back. I had Taco Bell yesterday night. That felt good lol. And then my mom cooked this morning, so I had her food after a long time. It's not that food there is bad, but it's just different. Different species of veg's and stuff. And I couldn't eat outside cuz I didn't wanna get sick- I know sounds paranoid.. but there, it really isn't. People who LIVE there get stomach problems lol. Today I had to go 2 school to do a whole bunch of stuff. And me and Amara had to get gas.. that wasn't fun. It sucks havin 2 pay gas wit cash. Cuz u have 2 go in and tell them and everything. Need to get a debit card. And then wit the rain.. I duno it just took a long time. So then I went 2 the IBO- God, do I hate Ms. Landaker. I had Ms. Kelly first and then since I was switchin into Strat. 4 College Success I had 2 go 2 Ms. Landaker. She is so sloww. And I dunno.. just really inefficient. Annoys me. So here's my new schedule:

1. Strategies for College Success- Colle- I dunno the name.
2. Ap English- Schillit
3. AP US History- Hall
4. Chem II- Swanson
5. AP Spanish- Halcomb
6. AP Bio- Morone
7. Pre Cal- Powers

I feel like I settled too much for Chem, or lowered my standards? I would've taken AP Chem if it wasn't only offered first hour...And I wish I could've gotten farther in math. Comment if u have any classes wit me. I haven't had a chance 2 really check wit ppl. And then I got my locker. It was the bottom one. So I went back 2 get it changed. Luckily, I knew one of the guys, and he did it for me. And the colonel wasn't there. But I switched it and it was the bottom one again lol. They told me if u divide it by 4 it's bottom and none of us checked lol. So then I felt like a dumbass for goin again. But hey.. they didn't check either. It was 132. Not that that is really relevant. But I got 133. So it's all good. I saw Mr. Morone- it was nice seein him again. He's a good man. I respect him. Once again, random. And I saw Liz, Sunil, and Allison- that was nice. I saw Greta 2 while the locker fiasco.

So that's about it. Sorry this was a long entry...

take my hand..


playmate101

:: 2004 6 August :: 12.52am
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: screwed // paris hilton

home sweet home!
after driving straight from Illinois to Florida, i am finally at home. in time for practice 2morrow, then shopping, then saturday having orientation and going to kaila's party! before school starts, i have to hang out with Alex, Jonah, Britt C, Brittany, Dominic, Jackie, Danielle G, Brett, Travis & Joey. I c Danielle B on Saturday!!!! YAY! plus Pretam, Anand, carlos, Kailannie, Sam, everyone! <333

3 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


playmate101

:: 2004 3 August :: 12.10am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: every little thing i do, never seems enough for you. // NSYNC lol

x posting. **
yesterday was fun. i went to ULTA (this big makeup store), Borders, and Carsons (to look at the Coach purses) with my aunt. Afterwards, we came home & i went to the Cubs / Phillies game. cubs won! yay!

today = woke up early, headed north to Six Flags Great America. Hit every rollercoaster with the exception of DeJavu. we went on... Batman, Superman, Raging Bull, Vertical Velocity, Logger's Run, Ice Mountain Splash, Rapid, Demon, American Eagle & some stand up rollercoaster. omg we hadda blast, now i feel like i am permanently on a rollercoaster. we got $90 worth of Fast Lane Passes, so we could do all the rides.

its now 10:42pm here and uncle jim & daddy just came back with White Castles =D

anyways... 2morrow we finally get to go visit gramma Emily's grave. i'm happy.

i got calls from brett & travis last night. they were in front of my house. damn and joey was with them too. o well... i will see them when i get home. i have to call millions of people when i get home. Ashley E, Jonah, Brett, Travis, Alex G, Brittany, Danielle G, Britt, Ryan, JB, Jackie, etc. yay! people missed me! <3333 anyways, i g2g cause i feel kinda sick. =/ hehe

1 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


boricuababy

:: 2004 2 August :: 6.23pm
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: Yeah-Usher

it's my birthdayyyy
the big one-six!! hollerrrrrr!!..finally..whew!!..took long enuff..lol..people are already turning 17..im such a yungin..haha..well guys..count down to the party has begun..lol..i left my celly at my dad's house..so if u called and left a message i still havent heard it..lol..it's pissing me off..i wanna hear wha messages people left..thanks to everybody tho that've wished me a happy birthday..i got my stereo system!!..it's hott..lol

6 and hold it tight. | take my hand..


playmate101

:: 2004 1 August :: 1.50am
:: Mood: drained
:: Music: autobiography // ashlee simspon

has anyone ever reassured u, but u were never comfortable?
heyyyy.

today was a long day. woke up & showered and headed downtown. walked from the train station to navy pier which was a good 2hr walk. we had like the whole family = 18 people with us. but when we got to navy pier, my sister found this place that embroidered plain hats. so she got one, n so did my brother. then my dad decided to get 5 for their paintball team. what a long time that took because it had my mom getting pissed off and everyone was hungry and grumpy. so when my dad finally finished he was pissed at my mom for being bitchy and idk what happened from there... my dad walked off. then he came back. we tried finding the rest of the family aka grammy & aunts & uncles.... but they didn't save seats for where they decided to eat at. so that pissed my mom off more... we all were walking to find a cab because daddy was soooooo pissed. and then in the middle of nowhere my parents started arguing in the middle of the sidewalks with tons of people walking around. so my mom walked off. and my dad was yelling my name, but i wanted to go with my mom... so my dad walked one way with my sister and brother... my mom walked another and i sat next to a cement brick wall and cried my eyes out because of my parents. then my dad came back & we found my mom. once i found my mom i didn't wanna let go. i was hugging her with all i had. then we settled... and got a cab.... and went to Gino's East Pizza. that's the best deep dish pizza i think i ever had. we finished dinner & caught the cab back to the train station. the trains were packed. i was kinda hoping that gramma & etc. wouldn't make the train.... but like... i wish stacey did. cause i love her. but everyone else... idk they just piss me off. cause they don't like me cause they think i'm too spoiled. w/e but everyone of them had to run to the train which i guess was funny torture. its freezing up here. we were soooo cold tonight. but i'm so emotionally exhausted.

i'm tired of my parents fighting at every family outting we have. and it gets ridiculous. tonight... it was so horrible... all i wanted to do was run away and pretend like nothing was wrong. I needed a shoulder to cry on. i had nobody to call that i could rely on. and i couldnt really call anyone because my phone... was at uncle critter's house. i don't want to call someone and have them say "awww i'm sorry" or have someone say "that sucks" or "that's gay". i just want someone to let me call them and listen to me. i can't think of one person that i can call that will listen to me anymore. i wish i could call jonah and just talk to him. i think he's the only one i can rely on. not because he is my ex boyfriend, and not because we had a relationship. its just because he is someone i can trust and talk to without a problem. he was always a great friend. and since i know jonah doesn't want to hear it anymore because we're over... i wish jb and ryan could come over right now. i miss them too much. my brothers. its sad.

i never realized how much people actually make their own families rather than stick with the ones they're given to by birth. i mean... i consider everyone in florida... like LOS people... my family, and up here... i don't even know these people... they're just labelled my family. i mean my dad even admitted that he believed jim & gail were more of an aunt and uncle rather than trixie and sean or paula and joey. that's just the way it is.

i'm just emotionally worn with no1 to burst on. this is why i'm so laidback. i get it now.

but while we were downtown... i enjoyed the lights, the noises, transportation, the people, etc. everything about being in the city was phenomenal! like the stores/shopping beautiful. (the boys downtown and on the trains were hotttt) gosh i wish i lived in a complex in the city. <33333

1 and hold it tight. | take my hand..

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