I wanted to believe in all the words I was speaking, as we moved together in the dark. And all the friends that I was telling. And all the playful misspellings. And every bite I gave you left a mark. Tiny vessels oozed into your neck, and formed the bruises that you said you didn't want to fade, but they did, and so did I, that day.


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You are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me.

recent entries | past entries

:: 2005 4 January :: 6.37 am
:: Music: Dresden Dolls - Coin - Operated Day

I got a new username for my main journal because this name is lame and I hate it.


Add me, sluuuts.

9 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 29 December :: 12.37 pm
:: Music: My Chemical Romance - I'm Not Okay (I Promise)

Ba ha!
Ok, so I have a story for my dearest Kate.. and whoever the fuck else reads this.

Well, around like 2am Kate and I decided to only communicate by writing words on our stomach then taking a picture and sending it to eachother. Yeah.. it was stupid, but we were bored and it was late. Anyway.. so this morning my mom asks about my rash (ya know the rash I got from having all that sex). I tell her it's gone, but she asks to see my stomach, so I'm like oook whatever. So I show her and completely forget about all the writing on my stomach. And in nice big black letters, it says "Well, fuck me!" And my mom is all.. *GASP!* "Stacy! What is that?!" And I quickly cover it up, and I'm like.. "It said.. puck.." So she buys it, and is then like, "Well, the meaning is still there! Wash it off." And there's the end of my lovely pointless story.

9 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 28 December :: 1.17 pm
:: Music: Death Cab for Cutie - Song for Kelly Huckaby [Facts Version]

I got bored.. so deal with it.
Things I hate, are stupid, or annoy me.
Read more..

This list could go on and on. Don't worry..I'll add more eventually. :)

10 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 28 December :: 10.19 am
:: Music: L.A. Guns - Time

Hey.. sorry to everyone that tried talking to me yesterday on msn. I guess it somehow signed me on. I checked my chat logs and I had like 6 people pissed off or confused because I didn't answer.. heh. Sorry.

3 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 25 December :: 3.47 pm
:: Music: Switchfoot - You

I got a lot of socks..
like eight pairs.

That's about it.

6 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 23 December :: 10.07 am
:: Music: Bright Eyes - Burn Rubber

Let me try this again.
A lot of these are old and I don't really take quotes anymore, but I decided to post what I have anyway. They aren't very good this time, I'm slack'n]

Read more..

11 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 8 December :: 7.29 pm

I dare you to say something to Brads face. You won't. Guaranteed.
Some lines from one of Joes updates that I was told to read:

"And that whole seeing brad after school thing? That's just lame. I don't need to see some douche after school every single day. If he can't cough up the balls to actually go to school instead of applying for a GED or dropping out or whatever the hell he's doing, he shouldn't have the right to hang out with all his little groupies after school. That's just my personal opinion, though. :)"

I won't ever understand that kid. He is so fucked up. Obviously it's either a jealousy thing or he's really fucking nosey. I'm going to go with both. Oh, and here's a reason why he's a hypocrite; Joey. He's one of his best friends. He's fucking 21 years old and he still visits the school, and all his little "groupies" hang out with him. Joey failed some years. Actually I'm pretty sure he got his GED.

"...he shouldn't have the right to hang out with all his little groupies after school."
Then either should Joey (wait..it's ok if he's there after school because he brings Joe home and anything that helps Joe is acceptable), Perry, or anyone that isn't in school anymore.

And Joe is lacking credits he needs. But wait, that's okay because Joe is ALWAYS right about everything and even though he does the same shit he looks down on people for it's ok for him to do it. It's clear to see that Brad being at the school has absolutely nothing to do with Joe. Yet, he complains anyway. When is that kid going to learn? Soon, I hope. For his own sake. Anyway, I don't really feel the need to go on any further. You all know Joe's an asshole, I have nothing to prove.

But hey.. that's just my personal opinion. :)

24 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 8 December :: 4.39 pm

"I may be stoned out of my mind, but I don't know what I did wrong."
-My Dad

1 kid | you worry too much

:: 2004 5 December :: 4.15 pm
:: Music: Straylight Run - Another Word for Desperate

So, my grandma bought me a shirt.
It has a snowman on it and it says ..*tries not to burst into laughter*..
'Make me Melt!'
It's terrible.
It's one of those shirts I make fun of.

I'm so going to wear it.

3 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 26 November :: 9.03 pm

Good things never last.

:: 2004 23 November :: 1.44 pm

KATEAMUS.. if you check thiiisss.. I need your phone number, and I'd like to know if you want to hang out today after school.

Leave a comment, punk.

16 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 18 November :: 6.31 pm

So.. I saw a dead squirrel in the parking lot after school. Its guts were all hanging out, and it was nice and bloody. Its head was smashed into the ground, and its body was all stretched out across the cement.

It's nothing exciting.. just made me happy.

15 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 10 November :: 6.58 pm

I'm falling apart.
I don't care if you want to hear me bitching, skip over it if you don't want to hear it.

I hate how my dad doesn't love me.
I hate how my mom loves me, but is too damn miserable to ever show it.
I hate that my brother hates me.
I hate that I lost almost all my friends.
I hate that I let people get to me. Everyone keeps asking me why I let them get to me. If I had a reason, I'd make it stop. I have this, "fuck everyone, I don't care what you think" attitude that is entirely too fake. I do care what people say. I can't stand all these people hating me. I can't stand people talking about me.

These past three days I have been breaking down for no fucking reason. My mom yelled at me, I went in my room and cried. I walked to the middle school after school, I cried. My dad called me a slut, and so many more words, I cried. I don't cry. What is wrong with me?

I hate how this easy life is so hard for me to take. There's so many people that have it a million times worse than me, yet here I am falling apart.

When I heard Sam didn't want him at her party I couldn't help but be angry. How all these people can just turn against someone for NO fucking reason kills me.

The fights that exist shouldn't.

I hate how I have NO ONE to turn to. My dad was drunk, like every fucking day. And he was screaming. He isn't the funny, haha, drunk. He's the violent, screaming drunk. I had to go somewhere. I went through my cell phone. I have 30 or more names on there. And I couldn't find one fucking person to turn to. Not one. And half of the people aren't my freinds anymore.

I hate to be hated.
I hate that I don't understand.

I don't want to be the sarcastic bitch anymore, yet I don't want to be the little depressed girl. I don't know what to be.

I don't get why you're all such terrible friends. I really don't. What is your reasoning? How hard is it to just be there and be understanding? My group of "friends" is by far the saddest excuse of friends I have ever seen. When it comes down to it none of them are there for you.

None of you can have a mature conversation. You have to call eachother names and be assholes to eachother. Just talk it out. If you are so sick of drama, stop creating it.

All I know is that if I had enough guts I would have ended this all tonight.

And with reading this, I know nothing will change. You'll just bitch, and I'll be your next topic for your lame ass gossip discussions.

34 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 21 October :: 3.46 pm

Ok, my journal is going to be 'friends only' now because I want to keep certain assholes from reading my posts.

Thanks for your time, kids.

1 kid | you worry too much

:: 2004 20 October :: 10.22 pm

You have to take the bad along with the good.

The good seems worth it, so I'll deal with the bad.


you worry too much

:: 2004 18 October :: 8.39 pm

Yet you still don't know what you're talking about.
Of course you all make it your business once more.

I love how fucking intelligent you all are.

Do me a favor and prove me wrong by not being so God damn predictable.

:: 2004 17 October :: 2.09 pm
:: Music: Elvis Presley - Mean Woman Blues

Homecoming was nice.
Probably the best dance I have wasted $10 on.

I'm glad I went.

3 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 16 October :: 3.14 pm
:: Music: Blink 182

You got served!
Read more..

8 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 13 October :: 6.05 pm
:: Music: The Distillers - City of Angels

Care to help kids?
I have the 'Music' yearbook spread to make for next years yearbooks and I need some help on choosing the bands I get to feature.
I need a band from each genre
Classic Led Zeppelin
Emo/screamo The Used
Indie The Killers
Country Kenny Chesney and Johnny Cash
Techno Chemical Brothers
Alternative Muse
Jazz Louis Armstrong
Punk Green day
Political Rage
Ska Mustard Plug

Also, I need any interesting concert stories, why you choose to listen to certain music, and what'd you do to meet your favorite band. Feel free to make it humorous, if it's good I'll quote you in my spread.

45 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 12 October :: 8.54 am
:: Music: Elvis - Love me

Hey slizuuuts.
Todays guesses :
Courtany Love - Around 5 people
Brody Armstrong - 2 people
Vampire that escaped from..something -Mrs.Martino
..*uneasy glances*..

All in all, turned out all right.
And YES the lipstick is supposed to be smudged. *hangs myself due to other peoples ignorance*

Anyway.. it's only Tuesday. That's simply not cool. I can't wait for the end of the daaay.

3 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 11 October :: 9.52 pm

So this is what I'm going for, for tomorrows 'celebrity' day. Or at least attempting. (- the crazy dots on her face from the magazine..) And I can't pull the hair off too well, so it will just be somewhat messy.

Brody Armstrong [lead singer of The Distillers]

Let's see how bad I can do..

5 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 11 October :: 3.16 pm

If anyone needs to talk to me, call my cell or something.

Msn is being a cunt again..

10 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 11 October :: 9.14 am

Man, could second hour be any more exciting?
So there's this store called, 'Stools and more.'
They have stools and more?
It's insane. I thought the stools were enough, but there's mooore. *gasps*
Does that mean they have tables too?!

2 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 10 October :: 12.21 am
:: Music: Frou Frou - Breathe In

Well, that's a bunch of bullshit.


4 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 9 October :: 4.34 pm
:: Music: The Killers - Andy, you're a star

I took this survey because Ron made it, and well.. he's a pretty cool kid. And I'm terribly bored, like.. shooting up McDonalds kinda bored..

Read more..

2 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 2 October :: 12.37 pm
:: Music: The Faint

My mom is a fucking bitch.
She grounds me on Red Flannel Day, an hour before I'm leaving.
She fucking flipped out on me because I "lost" the cell phone, even though I know exactly where it is. I honestly don't think I have ever got in that big of an argument with her. Ever.
"Where is the cell phone?"
"..In Kevins car.."
"Where is it!?"
"Kevins car!"
"Get it! Now!"
"Ok, I'll run right over to his car.."
"Get it!"
"I can't."
"I want it, now! Right here!"
"I CAN'T!"
"I want it!"
"Ok.. that's cool.."
"You don't get to use it anymore."
"That's fine."
"You can't use it!"
"It's not yours anymore."
"So Kevin is running up our minutes?"
"He's not using it. It's not even on!"
"I want the cell phone here right now!"
"Oh. My. Goooddd. What is wrong with you? I fucking hate you."

This went on for about a half hour.
Then she grounded me. For saying 'I hate you' and swearing.

She made me say I'm sorry.
She says I can go to the parade, but I'm grounded for life.. riiight.
In other news, she is still fucking insane.

you worry too much

:: 2004 25 September :: 10.23 pm
:: Music: Tears for Fears - Mad World

I have a few things to say.

I honestly don't understand any of you.

I don't have to explain myself to anyone. And I won't.

It's not your buisness.
It doesn't affect you.
I'm sick of your non-stop need for gossip.

The only reason any of you care is because of the gender. You pretend people can't just be friends. I am allowed to have one of my best friends be a guy, as much as he is allowed for one of his best friends to be a girl.

Get the fuck over it.


Oh and if you're one of the many who wants to make this world a better place and keeps saying, "Someone has to do something about it." Quit talking about how someone should and you fucking do it already.

Stop talking about it.
Stop pretending you know what's going on.

And please, stop fucking talking about me. I'm sick of it, and sick of you.

I'd be absolutely floored if even one of you actually said something to my face. Come on, surprise me bitches.

I guess everyone just needs something/someone to talk about, huh?

I can't believe I trusted you. You entirely take for granted that I could trust you. Throwing around these chat logs, telling people what I said. Where do you get off thinking it's ok? I can't believe you'd do that. Especially after a few days we got over a fight.

Out of all the people. You truly dissapoint me.

Fuck you.

17 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 24 September :: 10.13 am

Feed me. Feeeeed me!
Ok.. I have noticed something that I must point out.

[I can't swear because these are school computers, and I got called down to the office the other day for using a "bad" word, so work with me here..]

Anyway.. on to the point of my rant..

I'm so sick of people complaining about not being invited somewhere. I go to tell a story about something that happened when I hung out with a person, and in the middle of a sentence I get interrupted by someone saying, "You didn't invite me, wah wah wah." You're simply being selfish and only thinking about how you were 'left out'. Awwee..poor baby. I don't have to invite everyone I know everywhere I go. Let me tell the effing story, so you can effing laugh. (God, I hate not being able to swear.)
Get over the fact that you weren't there.

I also don't understand how you can't comprehend that I find it rude to just invite people to someone elses house.

Quit being immature a holes (that's terrible) and get over it.

Thank you.

Have a fun day at school slizuts.

Do it!

5 kids | you worry too much

:: 2004 23 September :: 8.48 am

I wish I felt that way all the time.

:: 2004 13 September :: 7.42 pm

Yeah..make your little post about what you think you know.

You're such a hypocrite.

You hate me for something you're doing, that I didn't even fucking do.

If you only knew.

If you would just fucking listen and not decide I said what you wanted to hear.

If you want the truth don't fucking block me then get all pissed off because I didn't get to finish my sentence.

I'm sick of caring about you.

And I thought I could trust you.

Ha.. right.

I just wish you realized that what you're hating me for you actually do.

(For that other special person.. just pretend I don't exist in 6th hour, please. Because pretending you didn't exist worked out just fine.)

"God, people can't just let shit go."

So true.

1 kid | you worry too much

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